I have forgotten how to love myself
I don't think anything has changed
But I know they say
You learn to hate
Those you've been around too long

I think I'm here to stay
So should I just find another way?
Maybe the lack of change
Is the false whisper of comfort

There are chains on my ankles
And they are cutting through flesh
The one I hate put them there
Swallowed the key
Probably to feel less empty

But what about me?
But what about me?

There is an echo
It's the voice of a selfish fool
Who needs help
And doesn't know what to do
We have too much in common
Something has to change
But these chains

I wish I could wake up early
And greet the morning
"Hey, how you been doing?"
And it would ask me the same

I wish I could wake up early
And tell the sun
That I'm really trying
And that I'm sorry
For always lying to myself

I wish I could wake up early
Escape the darkness
That I keep serving
I don't know how much more
I can give

I wish I could wake up early
I wish I knew how to live
I wish I could better myself
I wish I had something else to give
I wish I could catch up to my dreams
I wish I knew what they were

Run away
Run away
Run as fast as you can

No more of these days
No more feeling trapped
No more rattling in the cage

When the door's been open
Just turn the other way

No more rattling in the cage

Run away
Before the death throes
Run away

Run away

I see your rhymes
Playing in time
Crafting the tunes
That are on your mind

I see your structure
      Building a home
            To live in your own
               Architectural bliss

I see your simplicity
Abstraction
Emotional beauty

I see your poems
Penned out of passion
Attempts to plagiarize
What's in your soul
If only I could know them
Year by year
The poems and the emotions
And what's really going on here

How can I be a writer?
When I never write

How can I be a painter?
When I never paint

How can I be a musician?
When I never play music

How can I be an adventurer?
Or an activist?
A chef?
Or a celebrity?
A hero?
A philosopher?
A lover?

How can I live?
When all I do is ask questions

I thought I knew you
I called you a dark friend
Because we would always coexist
I thought I knew where you had your walls up
Where I could live as long as I
Didn’t get too close

Yet here I am
My face pressed against the plexiglass

Where I’ve reach out before,
I find my fingers crumpled
You are closing in, I know it
You are no dark friend
You are a suicidal maniac
Bent on destroying us both
The walls are caving in
And I’m bloodying my knuckles
Trying to get out of here
You can’t live without me!
But you don’t care,
And I know you’re ready to keep closing in
Until I either suffocate or am crushed
Together, we’ll fizzle out of this world

You need to be stopped,
But you’re moving too fast
I can’t get a hold of anything
If you won’t let me out of these walls

At least let something in!
Or just leave some room for me
Before you **** us both

I know that I’m dying, dear
So please don’t let go

Hold me tighter
To keep together the years
They’re running to the ground

Please catch me, my dear
I keep tripping over the time

Please squeeze out my fear
My anxiety, depression, and doubts
Because when you hold me
I remember I’m here