When you feel like having no fear,
only then will you realize
what is that thing called life
and that your biggest fear
is leaving your mother on the other side

On the other side of the land,
in another country
She is alone there,
doing the laundry

You call her through the phone,
see her sitting there alone,
You want to touch her—
But you can’t.

And you realize that year ago you could,
but you did not

It is the reality of child trying to grow up
a child thinking that is mature enough,
but is not

They say, Oh, what it is like to be a mother?
But Oh, God,
what it is like to be a child?

ive never understood why it happened
maybe i was misbehaving
maybe i was bad
maybe he just wanted to
to hurt me and make me sad

wheather it was my misbehavior
or his ***** second nature

i grew up mature
never a child
always an angel
never able to speak out

using my own words against myself

"i was too young to ask for that."

i never would have anyway.

-LJS