I can't
I can't keep living like this
every breathe I take is too harsh
too sharp not to give my lungs papercuts
too abrupt not to startle my heart like,
"wow, you really made it this far,
you're really going to keep breathing?"
and with a sigh goes the life from my eyes

I'm empty
when I want to cry I feel nothing
when I want to feel nothing I feel everything
either way I sit in the shower
watching the water pull hope, motivation, energy
down the drain with it
and with the water goes the light from my eyes

I'm lying here, feeling nothing.
I'm lying here, too exhausted to care
too tired to deal with the fact
that this is what it's like to spiral downwards
too lifeless to care about this life anymore