With cigarette stained lips
And smoke rings in her eyes
She cried her numb tears from the marrow of her bones
Something she didn't know she could do anymore
And as the salt stained earth of her skin rippled in rapture
Her throat sang gospels of ash and devils
The pink in her hair grew red as her wrists
The night fed her euphoria and shadows in her tear drops
The last of them spilling on the blue grass fields beneath her bed
And they bloomed into trees of white sand and salt
She grew devils under her sheets as she lay restless
Stray dogs howled to the nothing in particular of her song
As the gospels wore thin
And the house began to wheeze with fright
Its old creaking beams wrapped around her as she lay alone
In a bath tub
In the bedroom
In the kitchen
Alone

I didn't want to remember
but never tried to forget
and I almost didn't leave
yet I wouldn't go back
I wish I hadn't chosen
but wouldn't change a thing
I'm constantly humming a tune
yet without a song to sing
Feeling so claustrophobic
but afraid to venture outside
I'm sitting here hopefully
yet dwelling on goodbyes
I refuse to release more tears
but my eyes are brimming still
as I linger in warm thoughts
always confused about how I feel

I never,
never,
meant to hurt you,
and then the door
slammed shut
behind you.

How the Sun and Moon,
have spent so long
together,
keeping their rhythm,
Without ever screaming,
or shouting.

Water runs over stone,
it refines,
fluid, burbling brooks
run over
and never does the age old rock
refuse to be perfected.

She dances,
endlessly, outside
of time, parallel to us,
and he watches,
adoring gaze,
never bored of how she moves.

And I marvel
at that, complete love,
but I do not envy,
for we might scream and shout,
and slam doors,

but the light
at the end  
of the tunnel
will always be you,
and it's not exactly functional
but it's there.

listen to your mother when she is old;
'the truth is sorrow poisons you. desire
hearts
and lips. rooms are filled with
beautiful treasures.
men falter - how small is your strength?

hold the heart,
eat honey,
know your soul.

do not let your heart turn away.'