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  Dec 2019 Eleanor
we might still be ignoring each other,
(is that what we call this silence?)
by the time it comes around.
i might still love you
and you might still not know,
but despite this heartbreak
and shaky hands of mine,
i will still wish you happy birthday.
Eleanor Dec 2019
i cannot - will not - pour my sunshine
into someone who does not regard me
as their sky.
  Dec 2019 Eleanor
only the feeble-minded
refuses to regard time
as restraint.
only with ear ringing, heart pounding
will you realize

its already too late.
my diffuser, oh how shortlived our love be ·
  Nov 2019 Eleanor
i have been doused in gasoline
the moment i fell in love ;
and you took a match to me
the day i fell in love ;
held it over my head ,
teasing teasing teasing ;
now i suffer ashes
oh the burning
burning .
  Nov 2019 Eleanor
how do you get through
the days that are
all tears and tissues?
—the days
of running mascara
and stuffy noses
song of the day: “all we do” by oh wonder
Eleanor Oct 2019
scared to fall,
but more scared
of never flying,
so i sit at the edge
and wait.
i need to be more okay with letting myself fail every so often.
  Sep 2019 Eleanor
i was born in fire.
i can not deny the heat in my veins.
but i am not ashamed
that every morning
i swallow the sun
so that the moon
can keep pulling
back the tide
and i let the fog
cover the sunrise
i drench myself in night
because i am left
not right.
cold water comforts my soul
the depth keeps me afloat
there is something beautiful
about a black-colored sea
but as fireborn as i am
there is no ounce of love
for the fire in me.
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