A Child Whispers to Himself

Someday I will wake up in the morning
And not be wrong
Someday I will look outside the window
And not be wrong
Someday I will not make up my bed just right
(or maybe not make it up at all)
And not be wrong
Someday I will open the refrigerator
And not be wrong
Someday I will choose my clothes for the day
And not be wrong
Someday I will say something I think
And not be wrong
Someday I will toast a slice of bread
And not be wrong
Someday I will read a book because I like it
And not be wrong
Someday I will visit a friend of my choosing
And not be wrong
Someday I will admire the pictures I like
And not be wrong
Someday I will play in the leaves with the dogs
And not be wrong
Someday I will order from a menu
And not be wrong
Someday I will eat my dessert first
And not be wrong
Someday I will hug only people I like
And not be wrong
Someday I will buy the coat I want to wear
And not be wrong
Someday I will smile at the girl next door
And not be wrong
Someday I will write poetry openly
And not be wrong
Someday I will say, “That’s a pretty car”
And not be wrong
Someday I will say, “I like the fog and mist”
And not be wrong
Someday at the store I will buy some little thing
And not be wrong
Someday I will use the shampoo I like
And not be wrong
Someday I will take long, hot, soapy baths
And not be wrong
Someday I will tell someone about my dreams
And not be wrong

Someday…

Someday I will leave this unhappy house
And not look back
And not be wrong

whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong
oh!lots of things (she says this real quiet, not 
quite a whisper, and you wonder and think for a 
while about it
is she sad? you dont think even God knows,
or whoever made the World)
when I'm Old, I will create the world anew
sweeten flowers and trees and leafy things (or, 
or, or,
bury all the seeds,and wait a thousand years
for them to grow tall and big and Strong)
how dead are you how dead are you how dead are you how dead are you how dead are you how dead are you how dead are you how dead are you how dead are you how dead are you how dead are you how dead are you how dead are you how dead are you how dead are you
stamp something on it! make my death 
certificate official! i'm in love i'm in love i'm in 
love i'm in love!
she screams! and she thinks that finally, God, or 
whoever made the World, can hear her!
i'm going to put stickers on everything!
(you believe her)
and will the trees grow strong again? and will 
they breathe?
the forest is on fire, but
i think it's only in your mind
your teeth are missing your teeth are missing your teeth are missing your teeth are missing your teeth are missing your teeth are missing your teeth are missing your teeth are missing your teeth are missing your teeth are missing your teeth are missing your teeth are missing 
your teeth are missing your teeth are missing 
i believe you this time: she says, quiet but not 
as much as before
she is painting Doors and Walls and Ceilings, all 
in gold
gold on gold on gold on gold on gold
wow! are you a work of art? can i take you 
home?
do you want to go home? or, i guess,
do you want to go to the mountains or the sea 
or the forest or a lake or even the sky, maybe?
tell me, i'll take you there i promise! wherever
you want to go
free of charge.
- where is the boat going?
and she says, gosh! anywhere we want it to!

Something's wrong when I fall asleep at 9 and wake up in the afternoon
Something's wrong when I spend my day confused not knowing what to do
Something's wrong when I start doing things I never knew I could do
Something's wrong when your face is the only thing I can draw
Something's wrong when poems are the only way to say what's true
Something's wrong when life's so beautiful yet it seems so blue
Something's wrong when I close my eyes in my prayers and pray for you
Something's wrong when crying is all I do
Something's wrong when everyone looks and asks "what's wrong with you"

Something is wrong and that thing is you
Something's wrong and it's the way I think of you
Something's wrong and it's the time I chose you
Something's wrong cause I know it won't be true
Something's wrong but I'll hold on to you
Something's wrong and it's dreaming of you

Something's wrong and it's loving you.

Was it wrong to dream so big?
Was I wrong to care so much?
The stars they stay align.
It almost seems unfair.

(Was it wrong, was it wrong)

Was it wrong for me to stay?
Was I wrong to speak that love had no name?
The streets seem empty tonight.
I almost feel alone.

What was that thing you said?
No I am not afraid.
Goodbye just means another day,
In this dark emptiness.

Was it wrong for me to run so fast?
Was it wrong to say everything alright?
Seriousness is not another cover,
It's just another ploy to hide away.

(Was it wrong, was it wrong)

Was it wrong to cry?
Was it wrong to finally be strong?
Everything I knew,
I knew nothing.

Here the ocean divides in two.
Let happiness float deep below the waves.
The reality is better set far away,
Don't ever get close enough to feel,
Maybe then you'll fall apart.

Was it wrong to dream so big?
Was I wrong to care so much?
The stars they stay aligned.
It almost seems unfair.

(Was it wrong, was it wrong)

Was it wrong for me to stay?
Was it wrong to speak that love had no name?
The streets seem empty tonight.
I almost feel alone.
What was that thing you said?
No I am not afraid.

Goodbye just means another day
In this dark emptiness.

Em S.

I dont know
Never really did
The pain, the stress
The hunger for the truth
Blinded me from knowing
Whats wrong with me

I say I hate
I say Im angry
But thats my escape route
To keep me from realizing
That deep down inside
Im really hurt

Could this be
Whats wrong with me
Could it be
That im not looking hard enough
Not truly searching for
What all could be my problems

Like a pillars foundation
I have flaws
Some easily fixed
Others more complicated
But I still dont know
Whats wrong with me

Could it be
That I was never loved
By the one person
Who gave me my breath
Or cared enough
To say goodbye when she left

Whats wrong with me
I cant love
Without questioning it
But when Im with you
I still doubt it
But not so much

When I say those words
It pains me
Because I never felt this way
And Im scared
That I wont be able
To protect you from even more pain

Whats wrong with me
All I do is push and push
Never letting people close
Ending up alone
Without anyone to turn to
Yet I still manage to live

Every second is unknown
Every breath is questionable
Yet I still dont know
Whats wrong with me
That even your smile
Still makes me feel even more alone

I know that maybe knowing
Whats wrong with me
Is far from my reach
But I will know in the end
Since I have more time
I will spend it knowing I will succeed

Look me in the eye
Tell me you love me
Tell me you will help me
To discover exactly
Whats wrong with me
Tell me I'll never be alone

My mother abandoned me
She was the first
Just not the last
So dont abandon me
When I need you even more
At this time of despair

I've been hurt by those
Who were suppose to love me
And those I thought I loved
But the emotions are real with you
So please don hurt me now
Hurt me when I've learned more

I know I may say
"I'll never hurt you"
But I know that at times
We hurt those we dont want to
So until I've learned
Whats wrong with me, support me

Hold me close to your eart
Build me up when I fold
Dry my tears when they come
I only have this one life
And half of it will be spent
Figuring out whats wrong with me

So maybe if the truth
To all her lies
Comes and meets my ears
Maybe then I can know
Whats wrong with me
And hopefully you'll be at my side

**** it I love you
Maybe I really dont care
Whats wrong with me
As long as I have you
It doesnt matter
The past is the past I have to let it go

But the pain will remain
The anger and the hatred toward her
It's who I am
I just cant let it ruin me
Or determine my future
The future I wish for you to be apart of

Maybe I've known
Whats wrong with me
I just never accepted it
So the truth
To whats wrong with me
Is that I bottle my emotions

No that cant be right
Maybe there is more than one thing
That is wrong with me
So I wont rest till I know
Every inch of my heart
And why is it that Im confused

Syptoms to my disorder
Confusion, extreme anger, pure hatred,
Boredom, tiredness, and love for you
So I got a broken heart
And you fixed some of it
But it dont tell me nything

Another day, another month
Maybe even another year
And I still wont know
Whats wrong with me
So in the end
I might as well give up on knowing

The truth to who I am
What I am
Why I am the way I am
Why I think morbid things
Will never truly ne mine
So Im just another John Doe

Whats wrong with me
I've never been optimistic
I can barely love you
Without thinking
Your going to wake up
And realize you deserve better