'dystonia' poems - Hello Poetry

Amanda Shelton Nov 2017

Dystonia

Amanda Shelton Nov 2017

Dystonia

I once was able to run
nine miles a day,
now all those miles
seem so far away.

I am like a tree,
I am rooted where I stand
I am twisted up in unforgiving knots.

I know you think you understand,
but the truth is you don't
because you can move
and use your hands.

I am stuck twisted and contorted
in ways you could never understand.

My back is bent and rusted,
my knees creak and pop,
like an old car,
but I ran out of oil for my joints
now there stuck in odd positions.
You can only imagine.

I hurt, my pain burns to the bone,
grinding ******* my every move.

I can't move like you,
I twitch and ****,
I shake and stutter,
my mind is full of painful clutter.

Dystonia since 1981,
I was born with a twitch, ****,
and a stuttering switch with every move I make.
My nickname is Mizztwitch.*

*© 2017 By Amanda Shelton

Dystonia is a rare movement disorder. It causes odd movements and positions. It can cause your body to contort in painful ways. Like my feet they want to turn in and upward. My hands and feet cramp so do my arms and legs. I have been taken to the hospital many times before because of Dystonia. It's unpredictable and doctor's freak out if they have never seen a patient who suffers from it. I think anyone who has a heart would. I have had nurses break down crying because they couldn't take away my pain. I am a very strong person because I have to be to live through everything I have.

#dystonia #movement #position #odd #rare #disorder

Amanda Shelton Mar 2021

Dystonia

Amanda Shelton Mar 2021

Dystonia

No compromising, I am
bearing the pain.

The pressures crushing me,
slowly contorting reality
into a lucide dream of
misty minds melting into
burning piles of sore muscles.

I am twitching, cramping,
infections know me well.

I am the nightmare that reminds
you walking, talking, and breathing
should be easy but I am holding
you down.

Pain burning, deeply now,
slowly the fog devours everything.

My mind is a valley full of
infections and shadows
from my passed struggles
with dystonia.

In disrepair, every gear
I try to turn, every string
I try to pull gets me nowhere.

This marionette of broken
porcelaine, and burnt painful flesh
stretches to its limitations until
I pop, oops! all the black glitter
falls out.

My heart is strong,
my mind is loose,
my muscles are neither
but I am accepting this
suit.

I hold the power, self reflecting
keeps me grounded.

Lord don’t drop me now.

I’ve gotten so far, I forgot
about the sacrifice because
of this broken device.

Once its fixed my life persists.

Dystonia!

©️ 2021 By Amanda Shelton

I am awaiting surgery to repair my Deep Brain Stimulator. This poem is my thoughts and anxieties.

Ayeshah Jan 2014

Him'aholic, His'aholic( The Addiction)

Ayeshah Jan 2014

Him'aholic, His'aholic( The Addiction)

Man,
there's a cold dark corner
in my room,
your voice calls
out when I'm curled up there
on the dank musty floor,
it speaks to me; I'm coming for you.
I hold to the
voiceful melody of your
softly
spoken sounds as you drown out
the drone of negativity
and the past men who lied
when they said
they'd always love me...
His'aholic.
As I lie on my bed
in the fetal position,
eyes closed
hoping
you'll walk in,  lift me onto your lap
cradled me in that protective way
only you're able to give me,
feel your fingers caress me.
Too many times I find
I walk in a stupor from the loving  you gave.
Gosh it feels so long ago
and my needs wrecking  my senses
once more can you do to me what you did last time,
just once more & I'll let it be.
I'm feigning...
My dystonia
is you- every time you come around
I get what I'll call
His'aholic,
uncontainable, uncontrollable
movements and twitches
twerking if need be, just to get
intoxicated one more time of off
you,
like the excitement a kleptomaniac gets
or the levels of high a shopaholic feels
my dopamine fired up every time
you do what you do to me
Him'aholic, His'aholic,
Your'aholic
my
infectiousness habits,
sweats & hot flashes-
Man
because of what you do,
mentally I'm gone,
once you take root in my veins,
in my lungs,
I forget all that's wrong with the world,
all those problems from my past
I no longer see any of those things.
It's a made up word,
less you count when
Kelly Price
used
Him'aholic for her album title.
Different meaning in
His'aholic, different in Your'aholic too,
but
that's a bit more personal and much more deep,
it a thing where
  well forget I said anything
hehehe.
I make up my own words in referencing to anything about you.
Man,
I'm  jonesing, longing and yearning
oh please oh please
note
the
oh please-
I'm begging you!
Your the unusual
"drug" addiction
I need to feed on,
You got me
craving, shamefully
shaking with it,
longing and in a dazed- hazy blur.
Because of you I'm a
mindless puppet, my strings
once connected to you
are torn.
The music doesn't sound right,
the dance ain't got he same
rhythm,
I feel sick when I can't have you
feel upside down,
when I ain't got my fix.
I got it bad & all I want is you
say what you want but just know
I got a illness
there's only one cure for
His'aholic
&
it's
you!
Always Me Ayeshah ®
Copyright 1977 - Present ©
K.A.C.L.N ©
All right reserved ®

made up some these words and no disrespect to anyone with a real illness/addiction. Thanks for reading even if for YOU it may not make sense.
It was fun and I did a play on words. Besos!

Courtney O Nov 2020

Dystonia

Courtney O Nov 2020

Dystonia

A contract with a God I signed
A contract with the wide skies
I was a knot - all tense and *******

And I came happily undone
and it feels this twitch is the toll
Hey you ******! Whoever you are
I am neutering you, I am keeping you down
I'm marching for the Sun
Was it Prometheus or was it God?
I paid the price full for those
hidden magic pills
This is the small penalty for being free
Dystonia - for a perfect fit

On how I feel about my neuroleptic created dystonia.

#mental #health #neurology #dystonia #illness #god

Amanda Shelton Mar 2021

What Is It Like To Have Dystonia & Autism?

Amanda Shelton Mar 2021

What Is It Like To Have Dystonia & Autism?

Imagine chewing a large piece of gum,
now after the first 25 chew’s
spit that out.

Now imagine yourself being
small enough to swim in a
glass of water, now place
your tiny self into the gum.

Try to run! Come on, run!
You can’t.

Then you try to move but
the gum is pulling your
body back into itself.

You build muscle and you find
away to move but you’re still
stuck.

You find out you can break parts
of the gum but you have to move
quickly.

From there you learned to
flop yourself against the walls
you can wait there for assistance,
like a fly in a spider web.

Now you understand how
I feel.

Also, I feel like a
beached whale, or an
overstuffed panda bear.

Let’s do the MizzTwitch shall we?
Wahwahwah! Twitch, twitch, twitch!
Yeah buddy! ~~~~~~~√

© 2021 By Amanda Shelton

I am dealing with my Dystonia until I get another surgery to repair the batteries to my deep brain stimulator. I am also waiting for my pain pills to be refilled. It should be ready tomorrow. I have to wait up to a month for my surgery. I thought about this poem while taking a shower. Its hard to move without a working device. I am half android a bionic woman. Dystonia ***** but technology is awesome, together they are legendary 😎

Nallely Martinez Nov 2019

Gourds of Fondness

Nallely Martinez Nov 2019

Gourds of Fondness

Ah, Aphrodite whom's namesake leaps bounds,
Yet Artemis who is among the careful to arouse.
Delightful Persephone in her garden of souls,
Blessed creation like that of Demeter's lavenders.

Perhaps it is Hestia's hearth that which warms our hearts,
Or the bright light of the moon that which Selene croons.

Even Hera herself rings love under wedlock,
All but for Harmonia and her accursed dystonia.
Give forth to sweet Psyche who lies on sweet wings,
Illuminated by the truth that is Hecate's rule.

All of these Goddesses who've experienced love and joy,
Somehow Athena cultivates mere tactical ploys.

I wrote this during a phase of when I was very deeply delving into obscure Greek literature and myths. This one is rather chock full of them and can seem rather convoluted. This is probably one of my older works.

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