GRAMPA THE SOFT BALL PLAYER
                ………by Jerry Howarth
                             5/26/16
Grampa is a legend in the softball world
He was voted into the Softball Hall of Fame
When ever  Grampa was scheduled to pitch
It  broke the attendance record every game.

Grampa was a  fast ball pitcher
For the Perry Baptist church team.
He was having fun, just messing around,
But with every game Grampa picked up steam.

He began to experiment releasing the ball,
making it curve left & right, drop and rise,
He even learned to make a  slow pitch,
Making it difficult for the batter’s eyes

Grampa had a favorite trick he loved to play  The crowd thought it was super great!
The ball started out fast then changed slow
“How slow did it get Grampa?”  “So slow
the batter swung three times before it crossed the plate.

Well Grampa’s pitching became so well known
The  major leagues began competing with                   many others,
Offering Grampa  Millions of dollars.

Grampa developed a fast ball so fast that…
“How fast was it, Grampa Parson?”
It was so fast it was beyond measur’n.

Now Grampa had what he called his
Roller coaster pitch that no one could ever hit
It was such a crazy pitch, he had it patented
So no one else could copy and use it


Grampa was now playing  on a professional team, making over a million bucks a year,
His agent made a deal for $20,000 a game
Every time he pitched a no hitter


Every game he played was a no hitter,
Thanks to his patented pitch
At $20,000.00 a game
Grampa was getting really, really rich!

But back to Grama’s special  pitch,
It was greatly irritating to every batter
They were determined to knock that ball
Right down Gramp’s kooka-defrater

Hear the crowd yelling, whistling, and clapping
Coming up to bat is the world home run king!
Here it comes, that, fast, slow pitch
The home run king gives three mighty swings.

Three strikes an yer out, the rules of the game
It’s the first time in the history of soft ball fast pitch, that a batter strikes out  on
just one pitch

This poem cannot end without a mention
About Grampa batting power  
That’s right, Grampa hit a ball so hard,
It sailed about a thousand miles or so
It broke out a window in the Trump Tower.
YEAH It did! And broke Donald’s  favorite champagne drinking glass.

Well this is enough humble bragging about
When Grampa G. E. Parson was a Grandson
And I hope the reading of this poem
Was a lot of fun !
                              -Grampa G.E. Parson