He Remembers


The breeze blows the curls that frame her face
He watches from a distance
Notices her fingers brush the gentle wisps out of her eyes
He remembers her touch

The waves crash against the rocks
He remembers her voice
Her face turns up towards the sun
He remembers the softness of her skin

She pulls a flower to her face
He remembers the beauty of her body
The smile covers her face
He remembers the spirit of her embrace

She tucks the flower behind her ear
He remembers she never shows fear
She rises gracefully
He remembers her body beneath his

She walks towards the ocean

He remembers glimpsing just a touch of her soul
She picks something up off the sand
He remembers her tender heart

She looks out over the sea
He remembers her laughing softly

She walks into the crashing waves

He remembers how easily she hurts
The waves crash upon her
He remembers the harshness of his words
She suddenly is covered by the sea

He remembers the tears that he caused
She lets go for she remembers what she has done
He remembers what he has done
She welcomes the water to spin her into darkness

He remembers the anger he felt
She feels the life ****** out of her
He remembers her plead for forgiveness


She feels the release as she dies


He remembers he could not forgive
She is pulled from the water by another
He remembers the love he felt
She is covered with a blanket


He remembers the soul she gave
She is turned on her side
He remembers her at his feet


She is lifeless

He stops remembering
He runs to her
Her body is so still

He breathes his life into her
She continues to be lifeless


He yells at her to live
She had given all she could give


He breathes his very soul into her lungs


She hears him faintly through the daze


He begs her to return
She feels so welcomed in this darkness


He tells her he is sorry for his harshness
The sea sputters out of her mouth
He pulls her close


She lives by the breath of his soul to hers


Written By Niyahlove All rights reserved

She remembers peeking through the blinds as her mom pulled out of the driveway every summer morning
She remembers attending the same school for nine years with the same people
She remembers how her grandparents basement smelled like smoke and after her grandpa died, it no longer smelled like smoke
She remembers sticking her head between the railings in her cousins house and getting stuck
She remembers her grandpa teaching her how to play basketball
She remembers being afraid to go to sleep because she thought she would forget to breathe
She remembers losing her friend in 9/11
She remembers learning about what death was
She remembers asking if there was a playground in heaven
She remembers asking if she had to come inside when the street lights came on
She remembers sitting in the back seat of her dads truck, thinking that the moon was following her
She remembers getting a concussion during basketball when she was a freshman and not remembering anything after that
She remembers coming out and how her parents didn't accept her
She remembers falling in love and how it hurt like hell
She remembers her parents fighting and covering her ears
She remembers wanting to die
She remembers when her memories were too painful to remember

Now there he is, dying
In old age he suffers
from liver damage he dies
Though he suffers

He smiles.

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles

There once a night
This is the night she dies
He cries
She smiles

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles

There once a day
The day of their anniversary
It was there last
Though he know
He smiles

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles

There once a night
The night his son
Had a son
He is very happy
He smiles

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles

There was once a day
The day of a wedding
The wedding of his child
He smiles

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles

There once a night
The night his son
Goes to college
He is sad

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles

There once a day
The day his son
Have gone to school
He is proud

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles

There once a night
A Night like no other
The birth of his son
He smiles

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles

There once a day
They knew
He is a father
He have a son

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles

There once a night
A sad night
They fought
A misunderstanding

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles

There once a day
The best of his days
The day of their wedding
He is very joyful

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles

There once a night
The night he proposed
She said yes
He remembers

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles

There once a day
The day they met
She was beautiful
She still is

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles

There are more memories
He could not remember
But in his heart
It stays forever

His quiet thoughts
He thinks
He remembers
He smiles
He dies in peace

She remembers the day the stick turned blue, “wow for **** up the spout”
He remembers her smile when she told him.  Smile, really?
Then there was telling her parents, “okay we'll make this work”
Then there was telling his parents, “You threw your scholarship away for this *****, you're a *******”
She remembers the morning sickness
He remembers the hangovers
She felt warm inside when he said it was her choice
He felt like dying when she said she was keeping it
She framed the first ultra sound photo
He deleted his Myspace page
She noticed the day she started showing
The same day he noticed the legs on the waitress
She was snickered at behind locker doors
He quit the team
Her mom brought home baby shoes
His mom circled the classifieds
She got peanut butter cravings
He got hand gun cravings
It's a girl
It's a girl
She remembers finally talking again after four months
He remembers being cornered after 3rd period
She wanted to pick names
He wanted to hang up
She remembers their second first date
He remembers how nice she was
This could really work please kiss me goodnight
We'll see how this goes please don't kiss me
The doctors say the shadow on the ultra sound could be nothing
What if the thing on the picture is something
She prays for the health of Amelia
He begs God to do something about this
They have such a bright future ahead
He had such a bright future ahead
She goes to Goodwill for maternity clothes
He rings her up at the cash register with a kiss
She remembers buying baby clothes at the mall
He remembers how cute the onesies were
She sees him smile
Amelia...good name
She's due next week
He packs his cleats to make room for the crib
She packs to move into his house
His dad packs for a motel
She's still craving peanut butter
He's still craving the waitress
She ate peanut butter
He ate the waitress
She's in labour
He's in traffic
Hold my hand
Ouch...Okay breathe honey...ouch
There's no crying
Nice, quiet baby
Amelia's dead
I'm not a father
She cries into her shirt
He leaves the hospital
She cries into the onesies
He returns the crib to Wal Mart
She burns the ultra sound photos
He grabs his cleats
She gets a hair cut
He quits his job
She returns the diapers and shower gifts
His new Myspace says “single”
She shops for a prom dress
The waitress finds out he's seventeen
Her mom hugs her as she falls asleep
His dad pats him on the back after wind sprints
She can't stop starring at him during prom
He wonders if she went to prom
She writes Amelia in bubble letters on a piece of paper she hangs on her wall a reminder of what's important
He buys a Costco pack of condoms and tacks one to the wall a reminder of what's important

You just started to build an immortal throne,
Legacy,
Heirdom,
What’s been and what to come.  

Even if none remembers.

Your fame might be forgotten,
But the earth remembers the foot sole that touched it,
The print has been made,
With your soul as its name.

Even if none remembers, your time wasn’t wasted it was just spent
Even if none remembers, your time wasn’t wasted it was just spent
Even if none remembers, your time wasn’t wasted it was just spent.

On whatever made you survive till the end.

Tailored bricks by tailored bricks,
A start,
A home,
First love and hatred to come.

Even if you forget that custom made second.  

Your domain might be conquered,
A dragon takes a seat on your treasure heap,
Lungs filled with tar and sot,
Your dust is still a part of the earth as you rot.

Even if none remembers, your time wasn’t wasted it was just spent
Even if none remembers, your time wasn’t wasted it was just spent
Even if none remembers, your time wasn’t wasted it was just spent.

On whatever made you survive till the end.

The end,
Bitter but also sweet.

The end,
Your enemy and friend.

The end,
Not a punctuation but a semicolon.

The end,
Not a closed window but a new door.

Even if none remembers, your time wasn’t wasted it was just spent
Even if none remembers, your time wasn’t wasted it was just spent
Even if none remembers, your time wasn’t wasted it was just spent.

On whatever made you survive till the end.

maybe she remembers

maybe she remembers
all those loving words
we whispered in each
others ears

maybe she remembers
all those nights that we
stayed up

all those nights that
turned to morning
before we ended
them

I remember
I remember them all
I remember them and
tears come to my eyes

not just for losing them,
those wonderful nights
that turned to morning,
but for the fact that I
lost them, caught up in
blind hormonal rage

my words were nothing
against the anger you
rightfully threw against
my fragile mind

and I was crushed
my mind fell into pieces
as I was reminded not to
get ****** in

I cried
I’d never cried like I did that day

because I did
I got ****** in
like I knew I
shouldn’t have

but I don’t regret it

she probably remembers;
I told her I could let her
go then,

and I did
but it was hard
too hard
but I did it

I’m better for it

maybe she remembers me
I hope so

maybe she remembers
what we did
and
what we didn’t do

we’ll never be the same.
neither of us,
I remember why
and maybe she remembers
too

He sat on his bed, thought of her and nothing else...

He remembers sophomore year. He remembers the salt spray
and the moonlight that bathed them.
He remembers her handwriting as she wrote his name
on the soft sand beneath them
He thought of love, and nothing else.

He remembered the end of sophomore year and how he hurt her
He remembers the very words he used to deny her
"We're just friends" like a bullet the words pierced the air
towards her chest. His cold voice assured her that she was nothing
special.
But the young mind is stupid and easily confused so much so
that when he said they were "just friends" he meant that
She was the everything that came to his mind
when people talked to him about love

He remembers Senior year, when they got back in touch.
He remembers the empty conversations they shared
filled with "How are you?" 's and "Have a nice day" 's
that killed them both each time the phrases left their lips

He remembered sophomore year again, at the beach
he remembers her soft, freckled skin and the moonlight
as it shone from her eyes.
Like diamonds born through heat and pressure.
He remembers she was beautiful.
She didn't think so but he did, he knew it.

He remembers she left
and he remember it hurt.

He tells us that she's the everything he knew he needed.

"I don't love her" he says.

"Yes you do" we told him.

your happy remembers you
i left the letter on your pillow so that you could read it
you don’t want to read it
you throw it away
you tell it that you are done with it
especially when the cat doesn’t come home
even a cat  remembers your happy

     and i remember your happy
when it came home in your smile
when it held your hand as you laughed
when it whispered in your dance
when it snuck into your room at night

    sometimes
your happy calls your celular phone
it will buzz on the kitchen counter
and i will remember how it helped you smell the grass
and how ants used to crawl up your nose
like pioneers
in search of new places
new territory
to divide and conquer

    your happy left a note on the front door
it used the clear tape from your desk
it must have stopped by while you were gone
wondering
when will you return?
and you say that you will never

    your happy is still looking for you
it sent a telegram to your car radio
it wants to sing in your breath
it wants to dance in your feet
it wants to tell you that it missed you

    i stopped at the home of your happy the other day
to tell it you were gone

    your happy remembers you
it remembers the smell of your hands
it remembers the feeling of your head on its chest
it remembers the sound of your hair in the wind
it remembers your toes on the pavement and your hand in the cats hair

    your happy will never say goodbye
even after you are gone
it will leave a message in your shoulders
it will tell you

    your happy remembers you
    your happy remembers you

To this day he remembers the first time he saw her
Her wild eyes gazing back at him from across the room
And he immediately knew she was different
Deep inside him was an awareness of the inevitable
But he was hypnotized by her grace
Her majestic movement, fluid as the tide, drifting towards him

He remembers the first time his somber gaze strayed to her lips
And her euphoric laughter; a contagion
She was always high on the simple fact of existence
Never taking a moment for granted
And living each as if she expected it to be her last

He remembers her kisses, sweet as honey
Her lips a deep burgundy like red wine
The late star speckled nights that turned to lazy early mornings
Sunrises and sunsets
Magic and madness
She was his world
She was his sense of belonging

He remembers the day he found her
Curled in a corner
When he came home early from work
Tears streaming down her face
And the irreversible marks of a sharp edge
And fresh crimson on her wrists
Her cryptic mind always a mystery

He remembers her last breath
On that ordinary Saturday afternoon
While he grasped her in his arms
And begged her not to leave him

He remembers his heart shattering like a million glass shards
As he watched ever so quietly  
Her pale eyelids close
And her soul fade away

She stares past as her life flies by,
some memories sweet
while others dissatisfy.

She remembers she was 8
and her dad pushing the swing
with muscular ease
as her hair swayed
with the honey-suckle breeze.

She remembers her 15th summer
racing on through
bringing with it raging hormones
and ***** boys.

She remembers bitter tears
shed on mother's caring shoulder
when Robert said that they were over.

She remembers prom and
mistakes she made
and the boy who never again
glanced her way.

She remembers the agony
9 terrible months later brought
for a tiny, screaming baby
and she remembers the love that grew
in spite of the pain.

She sits on that bench and
quietly remembers her child’s firsts:
teeth, words, steps that grew into strides.
and her only regret: only the man
with his godawful pride.

She climbs on the bus
gently grasping the hand
of her bright eyed
and well-loved child.
And this child,
this child,
who is wealthier than most
for the child knows only of
love.