to tell you
you are terrific lately

Just because
you are all over
the map
of all creation

your prowess
is not discounted
here

forgive
conditional bones

you would have
no defensiveness

if you could put
your whole live's
goals, plans
ambitions, desires

into a single day

However there is
just this here now

one

and each of such dailies
and who can sniff each
as just another flower
upon the scent
of paradise

is the hourglass set
just the once
drifting time
unforeseen

or can forgiveness be
found through the occasional
dispensation somehow garnered

re-topping the hopper

Conversation inhibited,
Yet also free of constraint,
Small talk a challenge,
In depth conversation my forte
And interrogation my ally
Bombarding others with quick fire questions,
‘You’re too deep’ it has been said more than once
As I reveal too much once again.

Misunderstanding social cues,
Eye contact a no no,
****** expressions a blur,
Tone of voice a trigger,
Hence emotions a minefield.

Literal listening,
Literal speaking,
Leading to sense of humour bypass,
Don’t waste your innuendos, irony and sarcasm on me,
Direct speaking is what wins the day.

Overwhelming sensory overload,
Confusion,
Misunderstanding,
Mishearing,
Tendency towards negativity,
Introversion,
A war of words
Inside my head
Pouring out my mouth,
Tearing me apart
And those whom I love.

Now working hard to change the script,
To be aware of the impact of deficiencies, defensiveness and quirkiness,
To remain level headed and mindful
As I alternate between tiptoeing and running roughshod
Through the labyrinth of life.

If the Sun calms down today, perhaps I can objectively state the fears of my dreaded fears, not in vain and maybe I will not be alone forever! It became a negative of many memories in my brain! A cherishing move takes hold of me, and it would be good not to let it go with the Goodness of an unconditional donor! In my room at night, the only contiguous falling reassurance — with every palm in turn, can only hesitate any human Promise — is the moment that can be evoked with a single act, when we gave estimated hands unconditionally to the other and he was so relaxed as to betray his word!
 
This is how a given, trusting word can only become a nodding, apostate Shadow! On my face, tattered, tired tears, like bouncing glass *****, trickle at a slow pace, Greek! I would love to throw out all the ingrained nonsense out of my brain! Immortal Dear unfolding, flawless figure as if he no longer promises me his redeeming unearthly charms! I still keep my restlessness to myself like the scream of an orphaned child!
 
Waiting for a new reverence for selfishness, I take part in disguised annihilation as I stifle my will to act every day, my heart attack tempers! I am a child even after all these years, and the fragments of the curved mirrors of my face are constantly wounding the Past with their testimony! - Can the lace bushes in love with my words burn someone with a warm glow ?! "I am pondering the depths of my expelled defensiveness, I think: what did I have to ruin so far?!
 
If the Sun calms down today, perhaps I can objectively state the fears of my dreaded fears, not in vain and maybe I will not be alone forever! It became a negative of many memories in my brain! A cherishing move takes hold of me, and it would be good not to let it go with the Goodness of an unconditional donor! In my room at night, the only contiguous falling reassurance — with every palm in turn, can only hesitate any human Promise — is the moment that can be evoked with a single act, when we gave estimated hands unconditionally to the other and he was so relaxed as to betray his word!
 
This is how a given, trusting word can only become a nodding, apostate Shadow! On my face, tattered, tired tears, like bouncing glass *****, trickle at a slow pace, Greek! I would love to throw out all the ingrained nonsense out of my brain! Immortal Dear unfolding, flawless figure as if he no longer promises me his redeeming unearthly charms! I still keep my restlessness to myself like the scream of an orphaned child!
 
Waiting for a new reverence for selfishness, I take part in disguised annihilation as I stifle my will to act every day, my heart attack tempers! I am a child even after all these years, and the fragments of the curved mirrors of my face are constantly wounding the Past with their testimony! - Can the lace bushes in love with my words burn someone with a warm glow ?! "I'm pondering the depths of my expelled defensiveness, I'm thinking: what did I have to ruin so far ?!"