I'm getting hyped up on caffiene
and ignoring my problems just
kind of trying to forget about
everything that has happened
and everything that will.

I'm tired of feeling neglected
and turning my head away-
pretending that what you've
been saying hasn't made me
want to just set mysef on fire
and ignore my true desires.

I'm sick of running up into
my bedroom to escape inside
of my virtual worlds to ignore
the lectures my parents have
been screaming to me.

I'm so fed up with the fights
my best friend and I get into
they're pointless and make
me want to turn away but
I truly cannot because she
means too much to me.

I'm saddened and physically
effected by the way I think
and feel about myself. I'm
pretty sure if everyone
somewhat enhanced the way
they acted towards me I'd
simply crack. Shatter. Fall
to the floor in my own tears.
Because I do not deserve
such greatness nor do I
deserve the hate that I've
been recieving.

But maybe they'd be better off
if that were to happen, they
wouldn't have me around to
complain and dump my feelings
everywhere from the drain that
is my mind

The only person that I really
want to stay around for is
someone who I really adore
he is everything to me and
more, in fact I dream about
him a lot which is just lovely
like the smile that he shows
to me in pictures that I hope
will sooner or later become
mine, his, our reality.
He's amazing.