was that a boy
running down the lane
in that awkward skedaddle
ah! but no
he comes closer
growing sure of step
increased gait
and exposing his personage
the masculinity
now dripping
of confidence
a trail of heat
down into bliss
and alas,
turning into fires
between my cheeks

I wonder if I really am kind hearted.
Most people think it’s true,
But maybe I’m just afraid of being mean-
Maybe I’m afraid of being you.

Words meant for you, I told someone else.

When I should be in your arms, I find myself lying some place else.

-


as a kid
i felt along
the walls of a
perceived dark
confinement for
escape

imagining that creatures
were taking swipes at me
with their claws and tentacles

knowing —full well— that
discovery of a light switch
would end this game of
nightmares


YEARS—


my illusion of exploration
has been reduced to ashes
from decades of rapid
illumination

just as well, i cannot afford
to trip my way through
the darkness anymore

still

some nights i will turn the
lights off and imagine myself
searching cautiously along
pitch black wooden panels

thinking next time i might
miss the switch &
instead

discover artifacts from
a lost childhood...



s jones
2021


.