i watched him become - in my unbecoming.
still, I lay - unraveled.

hello, Melancholy.
old friend.

I am tired.

She said "I'm falling in love."

I said "I'm falling apart."

i do not believe in god
but i do believe in poetry
and for me
maybe poetry is prayer
and the universe
is an unwavering ear
in the shape of a god

on the canvas. I was
wet and dripping like a feral
kitten. My creator didn’t lay me
out in the sun. And so, my colors

run. The red and blues
look purple. The mother’s milk
curdled. Throwing me up as *****. And so,
I left a stain. Beaten by the brush

I lost my sense of touch. Now
I’m oily. I’m a spill in a broken
frame. I hang on the wall as
a flower. None admire me. But I haven’t
nerves to leave.

Honey, I love you - but why do I hurt you.
Honey, I love you - but why do I fool you.
Honey, I love you - but why do I lie to you.
Honey, I love you - but why do I hide from you.

but Honey,
nothing make sense.

how can I even begin to love you,
when I don’t even love myself.