What's holding you back?
Rhetorically this one's always hard to answer
Not because it's hard to articulate who is master over you
But more of I'm I willing to break free.
Still pondering the echoes of faith moves mountains spoken to a slave that's been gifted freedom.

My pastor once taught that the stomach is a better slave than a master.
Slavery keeps you in a constant beat
The drumming don't change coz festivities means more work.

Harder is freedom.
So buying or being gifted freedom doesn't mean the chains are down.
You have to transform your mind to inform your zeal and drive to do and to will.
Easier said than done I know.

I honestly don't blame the pharisees hardness
They bought the slavery and it wrapped it's chains around their brains to work in an old system.

We have been given this gift of salvation.
Price paid fully no more condemnation
But trying to jump with weights will make you feel the jump isn't necessary it's work
Not realizing each jump is freedom lived and expressed
Only thing required is shading
Letting go of the familiar chains
Embrace freedom coz your master no longer has dominion or authority over you.

Yes redemption was for you.
Step in and step out
We Are Free!!!

Years ago I set down my pen and paper
Gained courage to do life
And well, didn't life happen.

I'm smiling while thoughts race
through my nervous system sending signals to my brain
It's happening!!!

Yeah I'm paralyzed
Can't move
The bed has me chained
Refusing to let me go
It understands.
The rivers of tears she's collected
Watching passion, giggles, prayer to mourning.
How could it let me go.

Spit hit the fun and the grace I was hanging onto waxed thin.
The scars are exposed
My mind feels bipolar coz the journey of grace has my heart
Constantly on the surgery table.

The cutting is necessary sure for to remove the tumor you must allow the blade to work it's magic.
Often not talked about the process to recovery.
Not enough talk around navigating with crutches.

Even the brilliant minds go through it.
I see the end and it brought me back to pen and paper.

If you'd have asked me how
I wouldn't have been able to tell you
But He touched me
The energy I used trying to prove a point
I redirected it to seeking Him
I surrender.

I couldn't keep going back to
He leaves the 99 for the 1
I needed to see draw near to me as I draw near to you

Yes He touched me
Soaking my face towel in
Regrets and repentance
I felt a warm embrace

Every year I crossover
It humbles me coz who I'm I
That He favors me this way
Filled with gratitude on my knees
For He didn't allow the suicide to go through
Didn't hold my past against me
And everyday renewing His mercies
What a privilege!

So in the deep...
I'll trade my fear for trust
Guilt and shame for gratitude
Regret and reproach for thanksgiving

I said once make sure when you look back you can do it with a smile
But I'm also allowing you to look
Back with a cry coz you've made it through.

The mountains before you are now so far behind you.
The darkness that was palpable now gone to be forgotten
Coz light don't negotiate with the dark.
Finally you can breathe out and breathe in fresh air.

Pull your head out the water.
You're safe.
We're here now!

I put my heart a way in a lock and key
Threw the key in a well
I never thought there was a force so strong
That could pull the key to
Open me up again
But he has managed.
L. O ...wow
Who would have thought,
The aloof beauty has some warmth left in her
I'm still in awe
Still scared but this time
I'm more scared of regret than jumping the cliff
I pray that the ground won't
Stretch it's lips this time to
Kiss my pretty face..
All I want is to fall in his arms,
Embrace his sweet heart as though it's mine.

Baby I don't just want to love you.
I want to hold your hand through and through
You make me feel like a small teenage girl

@niamornimo

What do you do when you're at the edge
That place that you keep
Landing in...
Over and over as though a melody?.

When waves of emotions stir up
As tears fight,
Trying to escape my eye lids
Maybe wash off the pain in my eyes.

Religion, relationship, career, purpose
Nothing makes sense
I'm at a loss here
What's with me
Do I enjoy the roller coaster
And why is it always painful

This knife stuck in my
Heart
Stuck., as my molten blood
Burn it down,
Melting it from it's metallic state
Consumed completely into dark
The horror.
The voices, the mock,
The evil laugh,
Of him winning
Ha!...you're a seven remember
The mass that should
Predict the future behind you doesn't measure up,
Your face is pale,
Your eyes dilated,
Your knees sharp...decide whether you wanna be a girl coz ha!
Your short fat fingers ugh! Pathetic!
What was God even thinking trying to put up all this?
You're the definition of mess.

At that dark corner
I smiled,
I chuckled and in the middle of a chuckle  
I broke a tear
And laughed hysterically
For the sick joke.

Striding slowly to the mirror.
I see my reflection
I'm not sure what they saw
When they were saying all that
Coz I don't see it.
I see a reflection of God
Maker of the heavens and earth

Can't believe it broke my heart
Listening to their empty
Pouts
Maybe I forget how perfect
His work is
I hope I'll snap in time
To appreciate the rhythm
For the hallelujahs we to raise

Coz everything He created was good and perfect
So next time you
Find yourself doubting
His master piece
Consult The spirit that
Hovered over the waters
When the earth was with no form
Helping the Father complete His work
Which was affirmed good.
Not forgetting Him breathing life into
You and placing you
Where He called good and perfect.

Let His words flow out of you
Changing the slow rock rhythm that keeps living you hanging on the edge
And dance on those sharp
Thorns coz even though the snake
Bites you,

The poison won't harm you.
Maybe you're a small girl which
Is perfect coz you have a big God.