the monotony
of frap
after frappuccino

after frap,
sloshing flavored syrup
up my arms
and fingers sticky with caramel--

we run like hamsters
round & round
and don't stop
'til we're dead--

the rain streaks the house,
mist thick with sticky-sweat
like the furrow of your brow
amidst the drone of fellow worker bees
buzzing furiously in the hive, hollow--

this work we do,
this constant give

and

give,

to the corporation of fools
and zealots destined to become sheep,
however fully compensated & empty, too--

oh to have wings,
but be afraid to fly free
fast, strong & able
as a mind without a doubt, cellophane-
clear and successfully damaged
to take threatening direction,
to find the golden ticket
amongst racist Oompa-Loompas
but walk away from the true reason for being alive--

c'est la vie--

life goes on

well you already knew that--

the uncomfort,
t i g h t
             n e s s

like we're always
on different planes of pain,
but rarely inter-
secting,

this erratic strain to relate
when we're making excuses
and avoiding the issues
but kissing anyway--

h e l p l e s s
                     n e s s--

-LNM

it hurts
and I chew my lips
until they’re gone,
history–

though that’s what
lipstick is for,

to press to your
collarbone and hope
it’s enough,

am I ever enough–

this dull pounding in my chest,
gets heavier, harder
so I reach out to you

I hope the demons
will accept me,
allow the gifts I bring
to reside deep within
your chest, like the bones
of your ribcage
but they blanket my words,
reduce my efforts to cinders

like the day she left me
all alone,

always alone–

--LNM

we sip
berry blood wine
under the full goddess moon
eclipsed radiance
and I wonder about
our future--

I need dependable solace
yet comfort, the faith to
speak and not nag, to be really heard--

done with fake promises
and unfulfilled needs,
a new untread path
with brambles and semi-clearing
to unearth my passion,
my desire to grow
& love again--

--LNM
(02.11.2017)