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 Jan 2018 Nayana Nair
Laura Duran
If I could dance with you
Just once around the room
My dreams would all come true
....to dance with you

If I could kiss your lips
Eyes closed, hands on your hips
It would make my heart skip
....to kiss your lips

If I could hold you tight
In my arms, through the night
All in my life would be just right
.....to hold you tight

I can't dance with you
Or hold you the whole night through
I can't kiss you tenderly
....it's just not meant to be

But if I could....I'd be whole again
 Jan 2018 Nayana Nair
Laura Duran
I can scream
I can cry
I can curse the sky
And still, nothing will change

I still cry though
I can't help it
I still ask why
And still, nothing changes

The pain is still the same
It doesn't lessen
It's ever-present
And still, I go on

I still cry though....I can't help it
One of those nights that find the morning without a wink of sleep.
 Jan 2018 Nayana Nair
Laura Duran
I didn't want to kiss you
I didn't want to melt into you
I wanted to be strong
I wanted to push you away...
But I couldn't

I didn't want to cry
I didn't want to break
I wanted to be angry
I wanted to hurt you
But I couldn't

I was weak
I kissed you back
I cried as you held me
I want to hate you so bad....
But I can't...I just can't
I Was Told**

Well, I was told,
but who listens
when a heart is on fire.
I was warned
but you turned me to ash,
and I burnt so passionately
in your arms.

There’s a fiery madness here
found in your silent words
and I was warned
your touch would freeze
my heart in frost bitten sanity.
But it doesn’t matter
as this madness swallowed me whole
and I need to know
are you real;
do you care?
Or am I
just the ash falling
from your fingertips,
like a smoking cigarette
still burning in madness.

Aztec Warrior/redzone  12.8.16
.....thanks for reading.... music is  "Madness" by Muse
For Mom:
(b. 1925; d.2016)*

She held on to the sunlight
longer than anyone thought.
Palms swayed as she breathed
in all her strength,
all her power
until it all calmed
peacefully,
serenely.
Night cooled
as barren
descends, now
a dark that sings no stars
or sweet songs of life.
Her last breath
carried by crows
brushed across my cheek quietly
as I did not get to her in time.

As my sorrow fingered with my heart,
I saw the hungry abyss descend with her smile,
Still I heard in her whisper,
“do not mourn for me,
like our ancestors before,
I have found the balance
in natural tones;
in the music of stars
and in the songs playing
on Owl’s wings.
Do not mourn for me, my loves
I am alive still in the flow of worlds.”

There is a weight
taller than Denali;
heavier than Big Mountain;
I carry it with me
in my back pack
next to my jeans and dreams
as I follow her tracks,
smiling with her life.

Aztec Warrior/redzone  12.29.16


For all of you who "liked" and or commented on this poem I thank you from the bottom of my heart... your words are a comfort to me and my dad (I showed him the comments)... you have touched us deeply... I hope all of you the best...

And Nagi, you are wonderful in your kindness and a special thanks for shinning a "light" on this poem....

Curt
....thanks for reading
music is from Dax Johnson,  "Rain"

https://youtu.be/87FQtVebYtc
 Jan 2018 Nayana Nair
Angela Rose
He made sure I knew just how lucky I was to have him
But he never hit me
He played games with my emotions repeatedly
But he never hit me
He made sure I didn’t leave the house in a skirt above the knees
But he never hit me
He knew the words to say to make me feel so small that I could not breathe
But he never hit me
He tossed me in and out, in and out, until my mind was in an out of control tizzy
But he never hit me
He messed around on the side late at night while I rested in our bed
But he never hit me
He made it clear that I wasn’t to go out at night with the girls
But he never hit me
He told me over and over again just how hard it would be to find anyone else to deal with me
But he never hit me
He fell asleep safe and sound as I laid in bed trying to catch my breath through tears
But he never hit me
He needed to have the password to every device, app and account
But he never hit me
He knew the power he held and used it over my head to weaken me
But he never hit me
He made jokes at my expense in front of friends and family and we all giggled together instead of cringed
But he never hit me
He assured me the women he texted were coworkers or colleagues but I could never know what they spoke of
But he never hit me
He made it clear that my interests and goals were not of pertinence
But he never hit me
He knew the exact words to say to take my entire day downhill
But he never hit me
He broke my heart over and over and over again until it was minuscule shreds
But he never hit me
If you or someone you know is suffering from domestic abuse please contact 1-800-799-7233 this is the national domestic abuse hotline. Abuse can happen to anyone, man or woman. It does not make you weak to seak help. <3
sky
i.

drunken in my pockets,
the day whispers to the trees that
pin to you, albatross
of a wind-swept sea loosening
feathers and heart-beats in
short, death-caught seconds.

ii.

gorgeous girl of height,
your caves are bright mysteries
your light an elephant's graveyard
of grey.

iii.

bitter note of earth,
you anchor birth
to our eye sockets, unwrap
mint and honey from the hills.

iv.

uneasy mistress,
dark daughter of sight,
sunk into all the corners of the world
you break like string,
you break and i break with you.



v.

vignette of ivy-coloured dreams,
sunny trail, you break my heart and
glue it back, sigh and sigh like a viking raider
conjured out of porcelain
and rose-water.

vi.

warrior of distant planes,
dense harbour of a lonely city,
landscape of water, unravelled
in an instant, a velvet
ribbon tied into a bow.
 Jan 2018 Nayana Nair
S Olson
Overcome by this inverted lightning, i storm
into an abbreviated tomorrow, where i flood
into the dreamscape of today, eyes raining

down and inward. i sleep forth into the world
of waking, overcome by the temperament
of this mummified mouth. clawing the dragon
now hungry for my golden intimate currency

our love hides at the ends of my fingertips.
Fire nibbles the soles of my feet through
to my own heart, crumbling me clouded

where i go blind. i am sorry, marooned
on this island, where the corals reach down
from the sky. where stalactites rip the sails
of all incoming boats, the dragon survives

in an ephemeral artery, or in some capillary
where his teeth reign over whatever empire

smothering into, he becomes my face

to she that saves me. i have learned to love,
in that love has shown me it is beyond me;

where
the dragon follows my fingertips to your hair,
you walk beside me. where i am given i,
but awakened, beneath a golden sky

the dragon suckles everywhere

that i am saved. by the weapon of giving,

we carry an honest love
between our outspread palms

richer in treasure is
the continental freedom of having
washed ashore together.
Make this want wither,
O Rain!

Dig a brook hither
In my vein,

And plant on either side
Of my pain -

Swaying thousands
Of bluebells.
LazharBouazzi (December 15, 2017)
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