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You've made me have these feelings
Which I simply can't contain
Even though our relationship
Was simply so insane

The bed sheets on my bed remain
From the last time you were here
Which I know you may find gross
But it makes me think you're here

I look at my phone every chance I get
Just to see if you've left a simple little text
But my home screen remains empty
Which gets me slightly vexed

I know it's only been a day
But my feelings of you still come back
They linger around
Like a fly that you can't seem to smack

I sit her dwelling on the cute memories we had
Just like the time we shared a bubble bath
But I know that to you
It was a way to avoid my hidden wrath

You had me hypnotised
From the ******* that spilled from your mouth
The way you said you worried that one day I'd be gone
But you've just made us go further down south

Because lying is the thing that I simply can't stand
But congratulations as you've got the win
You have now gotten rid of me
Even though you remain under my skin

So go on enjoy you're freedom
Because soon you'll see what you had and sit there all glum
I know this is really ****** but I have to vent out somehow
  Jun 2014 Monica Garcia-Suarez
Sara
i don't want to walk with you
or to pillow talk with you
i want just you

i don't want to die with you
or to get high with you
i want just you

i don't want to curl up with you
or to be love struck by you
i want just you

i don't want cute dates with you
or to wake next to you
i want just you

i don't want to get to know you
over dinner, then to owe you
i want just you

i don't want commitment
or to have to admit that
i want more than 'just you'

though it’s a shame love has hurt me before
it's getting much harder for me to ignore:
the fact that i don't really want 'just you'
it's all the little things that i don't want to want to
2018 edit I definitely just want to get high witchu x
  Jun 2014 Monica Garcia-Suarez
Sara
Let me start by saying
I don't believe in love
But please let me explain
that it's just a rule of thumb

I say I hate the world
as I have a fear of rejection
I'm slightly socially awkward
especially when showing affection

However, beneath the surface
is another side to me
which i hide away from the world
for only a few to see:



I act like I'm the best
because I feel like I'm the worst
I shake my fringe and lower my head
when I'm uncomfortable or hurt

I have a tendency to overthink
and I get jealous easily
and I find it hard admit
as I'm afraid of people seeing all of me

I don't like to tell people these things
as it makes me feel vulnerable
just like I'll only sing to you
when I am feeling comfortable

I know you know I say 'shut up'
when what I really mean is 'yes'
there's a reason I'm telling you all these thing
that I probably should confess

I wanted to let you know me
but I was unsure how to do it
so I had to write a poem
or I'd be too awkward to get through it

So I have to tell you in a poem
how I really feel
before I change my mind
and the truth is never revealed

I say I'm really good with words
when actually, I'm just average
I'll say one thing but you'll know I mean another
if you watch my body language

I say that i don't give a ****
and that is sometimes true
but you can tell I'm lying
if I can't look at you

I've said I don't believe in love
yet I believe in fate
and I guess I like you quite a bit
so I'll tell it to you straight

i don't like expressing emotions
so forgive me if I'm blunt
but listen close to this
because I'll only say it once

-

I like the way you sing to me
though sometimes out of tune
I like the way when we lie down
you let me be the little spoon

I like how we don't have to talk
when we lay side by side
I love it when you tell me
that you miss me late at night

I hate your slow replies
but that's only because I'm needy
I like how we think we're really cute
when others think we're cheesy

I like the way you're patient
and how you hold my hand
i like the way you're respectful
and the way you understand

I like how we feel comfortable
when we're around each other
but i have to admit you're super annoying
when you steal all the covers

Your eyes, I've noticed, do this thing
where they go really soft
and i don't know if you knew
but you do it quite a lot

I like the way that sometimes
in your kitchen we'll slow dance
And normally I'm quite wary
but with you I took a chance

i hate the way you outsmart me
and how you're often right
I hate the way you cross my mind
every single night

I laugh at the face you make
when my hair falls in the way
I find it funny how we insult each other
at least five times a day

'Beauty is in the eye of the beholder'
is what we both live by
but I know I won't feel worthy of you
however hard I may try

I've said I don't believe in love
as it's a common misconception
but maybe I'm starting to think
that every rule has an exception
You loved me when
   I was loved by everyone else

but when I was lonely,

*you only made me lonelier.
I sit there with bloodshot, swollen eyes
A tear stained face
A trembling body
A runny nose

Look what you've done to me,
Is this really what you wanted
Y'all smoke to enjoy it
I smoke to die
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