I will never know,
If you lied to me
or if you really meant it
I will never discover,
How far we could've made it if I hadn't left it
I will never feel,
Your lips pushed against mine when I can't shut up
I will never see,
If you succeed and reach
your still-unknown goals
I will never be able to help,
When you're out of control and only my voice can calm your anger
I will never
have my first love back,
But it's better than danger.
Because when two people procceed with something they know will fail, they both just break apart and stay in their own jail.
                       -M.F.

Why did you have to do that, Melany?
Why did you have to tell your mother what you saw?
Why couldn't you just be a good daughter and just keep your mouth shut?

Everything I ever taught you has been replaced,
By a world with a so-called-moral base,
That you and I both know, will only end in disgrace.

This is all your fault, Melany.
If only you had understood that I was devastated,
and that I felt obligated,
Maybe you wouldn't be so isolated.

Why did you tell her I didn't deserve her,
Why did you see what I did as ****** up,
Why did you describe the way I touched her made her tremble more than
your mother ever did after getting beaten up.

Why did you try to stop me when I hit her, Melany?
You have to understand that when a slave is doing anything but their job,
you punish them until they say nothing but "yes, sir".

When something that belongs to you is not working properly,
you bang it against a table until it starts working again.

Your mother deserved it, Melany.
She deserved it for searching through my clothes instead of playing her role.
For crying for no reason, whenever I got home drunk.
She deserved it for begging me to stop when I had done nothing wrong.

Your grandfather has always taught us this and I don't understand
why you don't seem to understand.

How many times do I have to tell you, Melany?
Why don't you get anything, Melany?
You have to focus on school.
You have to focus on school because if you don't
you'll end up as a slave and you are nobody's slave.
You have a future and you have goals that you have to accomplish,
so why aren't you learning from me like you learn from school?

You know your trig but not my trick,
The one I try so hard to carve into your brain so you'll never forget.
You can do the math, but you don't seem to catch,
That what I'm trying to teach you will forever last.

I am your father, Melany.
I made you.
You exist because of me.
Remember that.
Pay attention when I talk to you.
Listen to me.
"Why won't you listen to me?"

You ask me the same question but it is only because you don't speak.
Your headphones are always plugged in,
and your personal life is hidden within,
You look at me as if I were a sin
And  avoid the conversations whose scripts are too thin

You can't let people hurt you Melany.
Don't let these boys hurt you.
Don't let them touch, look, or love you.
I love you and that should be enough.
Is that not enough?
Is my love not good enough for  you?

I love and miss you,
and I try so hard to teach you.
You have to lie when you need to, Melany.
Don't tell me that it's wrong.
You need to defend yourself no matter the cost,
you have to do it with no fear for loss.
You have to realize this world is cruel,
and the only way to succeed is to live by MY rules.

You need to obey, Melany.
You have to listen to me, Melany.
You have to be by my side, Melany.

I did this for you.
I did this for your teacher.
Your teacher needed love, Melany.
She needed love like you needed an ice cream on that hot summer day,
and I just happened to be cold enough for her.

You don't understand
You don't understand what I do for you.
You don't understand what I try to teach you
Why is it that you seem to understand poetry and calculus just fine,
but refuse to take notes on my view on life.

I loved your mother, Melany.
I loved your mother as much as I loved your teacher,
I loved your teacher as much as I'll love the next,
I love them all how I've been taught to love.

And

I love you, Melany, as much as I've ever loved anyone in my life,
You understand?

She has commitment issues.
So she'll wake up one day, shaky hands and all, and tell you she doesn't need you, much less wants you.
You can't fathom this idea and won't want to leave
But she will pick at your insecurities until all you want to do is get away from her

But don't fall for it
Don't listen
Don't give her more reason to be angry at the world

You need to reassure her that you didn't hug her broken pieces back into place
Just to let her fall again

You need to remind her that you don't want her "falling" in love with you because everything that falls breaks and you've been there before.

You need to show her that you love her and remember that she feels the same way. She wouldn't be with you if she didn't. So when she tells you she hates you, calls you an idiot and laughs at your attempt to be sweet, don't forget that's her way of saying "I love you".

She is a bird that hates feeling tied down; so let her fly, but make sure to always be there whenever the wind is too strong.

And when she throws all your clothes in a suitcase and tells you to get lost, empty it out all over the living room floor. Tell her to pick a hoodie, let her put it on,
and cuddle her fears away.

I've been trying to write a poem about you for weeks now,
So why not write one about how it's nearly impossible to completely describe the sparkle in your eyes whenever you know we're both thinking the same thing.
You often ask me to describe you with one word,
But I think that's unfair because you're so much more than just one word.
You are hundreds of unfinished novels,
You are a lifetime of mysteries that seem impossible to solve,
You are that song stuck in everyone's head,
You are a warm cup of coffee in a cruel, cold day.
You are every shooting star in the universe whose assigned wish is to meet someone like you.
You are my trying so hard to come up with metaphors because that is the only way I can even get close to how wonderful you are.
Our laughter and thoughts seem to be in sync and our tears seem to fall in a rhythm that only waterfalls have been able to master.
I'm a dreamer and you're realistic.
Some might think our differences won't let us get along but I think it makes us fit together.
My head is always in the clouds but you seem to understand the force of gravity perfectly.
I am always daydreaming:
Looking at the moon's imperfections and trying to relate to it,
Because maybe that way neither one of us would feel so lonely.
I do this while you consider the probabilities:
Thinking rationally through adversity and over-thinking equations
Because what chance is there of your wish coming true?
Sometimes, I need someone to pull me from my feet back to the ground, because if I stay up there too long I WILL get lost, and you know that.
But other times, though, you need someone to grab you by the hand and bring you somewhere magical, because escaping is also a way of staying sane, and I know that.
I am so clumsy, and that's why you're always beside me, making sure that I stay balanced.
And if I happen to fall, which I do sometimes, you're there to pick me back up (right after laughing of course).
But what blows my mind is how oblivious you are of your greatness.
you’re full of generosity,
which balances out well with my animosity,
And even though my mind has the capacity to move at rapid velocities.
You are still able to stop the possible monstrosities.
You understand me better than anyone,
And whenever the waterfall turns into a storm, you are the sun that claims that better days are coming.
So this is for you. I cannot quite find words beautiful enough to describe you entirely,
But I do know how to say thank you.
And no, this one isn't about a boy.
I'm talking about my best friend.