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  Dec 2014 Mikaela Vega
Edgar Allan Poe
Thank Heaven! the crisis—
  The danger is past,
And the lingering illness
  Is over at last—
And the fever called “Living”
  Is conquered at last.

Sadly, I know,
  I am shorn of my strength,
And no muscle I move
  As I lie at full length—
But no matter!—I feel
  I am better at length.

And I rest so composedly,
  Now in my bed,
That any beholder
  Might fancy me dead—
Might start at beholding me
  Thinking me dead.

The moaning and groaning,
  The sighing and sobbing,
Are quieted now,
  With that horrible throbbing
At heart:—ah, that horrible,
  Horrible throbbing!

The sickness—the nausea—
  The pitiless pain—
Have ceased, with the fever
  That maddened my brain—
With the fever called “Living”
  That burned in my brain.

And oh! of all tortures
  That torture the worst
Has abated—the terrible
  Torture of thirst,
For the naphthaline river
  Of Passion accurst:—
I have drank of a water
  That quenches all thirst:—

Of a water that flows,
  With a lullaby sound,
From a spring but a very few
  Feet under ground—
From a cavern not very far
  Down under ground.

And ah! let it never
  Be foolishly said
That my room it is gloomy
  And narrow my bed—
For man never slept
  In a different bed;
And, to sleep, you must slumber
  In just such a bed.

My tantalized spirit
  Here blandly reposes,
Forgetting, or never
  Regretting its roses—
Its old agitations
  Of myrtles and roses:

For now, while so quietly
  Lying, it fancies
A holier odor
  About it, of pansies—
A rosemary odor,
  Commingled with pansies—
With rue and the beautiful
  Puritan pansies.

And so it lies happily,
  Bathing in many
A dream of the truth
  And the beauty of Annie—
Drowned in a bath
  Of the tresses of Annie.

She tenderly kissed me,
  She fondly caressed,
And then I fell gently
  To sleep on her breast—
Deeply to sleep
  From the heaven of her breast.

When the light was extinguished,
  She covered me warm,
And she prayed to the angels
  To keep me from harm—
To the queen of the angels
  To shield me from harm.

And I lie so composedly,
  Now in my bed
(Knowing her love)
  That you fancy me dead—
And I rest so contentedly,
  Now in my bed,
(With her love at my breast)
  That you fancy me dead—
That you shudder to look at me.
  Thinking me dead.

But my heart it is brighter
  Than all of the many
Stars in the sky,
  For it sparkles with Annie—
It glows with the light
  Of the love of my Annie—
With the thought of the light
  Of the eyes of my Annie.
  Dec 2014 Mikaela Vega
Edgar Allan Poe
By a route obscure and lonely,
Haunted by ill angels only,
Where an Eidolon, named NIGHT,
On a black throne reigns upright,
I have reached these lands but newly
From an ultimate dim Thule—
From a wild weird clime that lieth, sublime,
  Out of SPACE—out of TIME.

Bottomless vales and boundless floods,
And chasms, and caves, and Titan woods,
With forms that no man can discover
For the dews that drip all over;
Mountains toppling evermore
Into seas without a shore;
Seas that restlessly aspire,
Surging, unto skies of fire;
Lakes that endlessly outspread
Their lone waters—lone and dead,
Their still waters—still and chilly
With the snows of the lolling lily.

By the lakes that thus outspread
Their lone waters, lone and dead,—
Their sad waters, sad and chilly
With the snows of the lolling lily,—

By the mountains—near the river
Murmuring lowly, murmuring ever,—
By the gray woods,—by the swamp
Where the toad and the newt encamp,—
By the dismal tarns and pools
  Where dwell the Ghouls,—
By each spot the most unholy—
In each nook most melancholy,—

There the traveller meets aghast
Sheeted Memories of the past—
Shrouded forms that start and sigh
As they pass the wanderer by—
White-robed forms of friends long given,
In agony, to the Earth—and Heaven.

For the heart whose woes are legion
’Tis a peaceful, soothing region—
For the spirit that walks in shadow
’Tis—oh, ’tis an Eldorado!
But the traveller, travelling through it,
May not—dare not openly view it;
Never its mysteries are exposed
To the weak human eye unclosed;
So wills its King, who hath forbid
The uplifting of the fringed lid;
And thus the sad Soul that here passes
Beholds it but through darkened glasses.

By a route obscure and lonely,
Haunted by ill angels only.

Where an Eidolon, named NIGHT,
On a black throne reigns upright,
I have wandered home but newly
From this ultimate dim Thule.
  Dec 2014 Mikaela Vega
ephemeral
you didn't realize it, but our souls were intertwined. when you hurt, some part inside of me felt that same pain; even more so than you did, because it hurt me to see you hurt. and when you were smiling, my heart filled with warmth and happiness, because I knew how much you deserved that moment of serenity and joy. but when you changed, and disappeared suddenly, all I felt was nothingness because when you left, you took a part of me with you.
This doesn't have much of a structure, but I like it.
Mikaela Vega Dec 2014
waiting, enter, music
enter, music, fans
music, fans, dance
fans, dance, mosh
dance, mosh, break
mosh, break, band
break, band, leave
Mikaela Vega Dec 2014
Today I awoke to the piercing sound of lightning striking a dead tree outside my window. I look out the window to see it has caught fire, and I wonder to myself how this violent downpour isn’t stopping this incandescence brightening my room. I step outside my house, and as I take my last steps down the porch, I  plunge feet first into a pool of dark red blood. I keep walking.. Cold, tired, and scared. I can barely see through all the fog. Through squinted eyes I make out a dark figure sitting on the bench beneath my tree..and in his hand, a single red rose. As I inch closer to this man I notice he is tearing apart the rose, one petal at a time. With all the confidence in the world I walk up to this man and stand in front of him. He does not look up, in fact he keeps pulling the petals off, and as I observe my surroundings more I notice that when the petals hit the ground, instead of staying in their original form they turn into a small puddle of blood. This man only looks down, in fact my presence has absolutely no effect on him, like he can’t see me.. Ash falls onto both of us, but he does not move..I move on, drenched in blood, ash, and dirt, and rain.

In veils of black, nighttime screams in my face. I walk up a dirt road. Never before in my life have I felt so emotionless, so dead. Walking on this lonely dirt rode I stumble upon a graveyard. I can barely see the top of the headstones over the fog caused from the cold. I walk throughout the graveyard, and wonder why it seems so familiar. I take a better glance at the headstones; I see many names of people close to me. The feeling of being alone hits me like a ton of bricks, but I do not weep for these people.  I just keep on my journey and do not look back.
Basically this is what comes to mind when I think of depression.
Mikaela Vega Dec 2014
Pierced through the heart,
An arrow from you,
Hypnotized by those things you do.
Drowning in love,
I gasp for air,
You tell me you love me,
You say that you care.
I grip my chest,
To hold my heart,
With you our love will never part.
I take my heart,
Hand it to you,
I say baby I love you.
Do to it what you want..
But break this poor heart is one thing you cannot.
She gets a tear in her eye,
And says baby id never try.
We kiss and we hug for over an hour,
But to hold this love takes a stronger power,
It takes the power of life that we cannot chose,
The one thing so easy to lose.
I looked at her as she fell to the floor,
Pushing my body into the door,
Breaking down with so much pain,
Now that shes gone there's no more to gain.
What to do and where to go?
When the river of love can no longer flow.

Laying in my bed sad and sorrow,
Knowing I wont see her tomorrow.
I wear a smile to hide the pain,
How life will never be the same.
Without her my hearts not whole,
Now all is left is her body, without a soul.
The next morning I wake up to the crack of dawn,
Burst into tears knowing my one true love is forever gone.
Now that i'm empty i'm dead too,
there's not really much left for me to do.
my life was based on her life..
the only one who could be my wife.
( A collaboration with Monica H.)
Mikaela Vega Dec 2014
Forbidden because a number,
Wanted still the same,
How to finish this picture,
If you don't add a frame?
A painters dream,
No longer there,
For this picture is forbidden,
Nothing in life is fair.
Little by little,
The painting comes together,
The artist can see it coming,
Starting to feel better.
How can something like this affect the value?
Any painting of any age,
Is still a painting,
Colors on a page.
The artist doesn’t care anymore,
Paint on the paper,
Draw out love and let your worries turn to vapor.
All you have to do is add the final touch,
I wait here patiently,
Now all you need is to add the frame,
Together we will be.
You have painted courage, devotion, strength...
your angel from above,
those things are what make
our forbidden love.
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