My lungs keep me breathing, but am I really alive?
24 years later, and I'm just living to survive.
Because cowards end their life,
With a gun, pills or a knife.
And none of those are the answer I'm trying to derive.

My life has been flipped, in every possible sense.
I fear I'm becoming always mentioned in the past tense.
I work at night and sleep all day,
No one to hear what I've got to say,
I'm staying afloat, but at what expense?

These are my feeble cries to a unconcerned crowd.
I continue to chant "when will I make you proud?"
Because the people don't care
All they will do is stare.
As I cause a scene with a voice that echoes loud.

a couple months ago, i was okay
a couple months ago, i was poking a skateboard into my thigh
a couple months ago, i found myself in your arms, hoping you'd never let go
a couple months ago, you'd lie to your dad so you could spend the night
a couple months ago, we were in love

but now, i'm not okay
now, i'm leaving art class to cry in the bathroom
now, i'm chainsmoking marlboros, even though i know you hated when i smoked
now, i'm wandering downtown wishing i'd bump into you
now, i don't know if i can handle myself without you
now, it's not okay
but now, i'm still in love

and in that moment, i thought i was over you. that moment when i was kissing another guy, you weren't on my mind. but now, you never ******* leave. my eyes strain from staring at my phone, reading our old messages. i'm already sick, but the endless tears and migraines are making me sicker. i thought i could work without you by my side, just like i did before but this time it was different. i depended on you for months but you slowly crept out of my life. there are points when i think i'm over you but i see something and all of a sudden, you're right back in my mind again. it's been about a month since you broke up with me, but every single nights since then i've been getting ****** up so i'm able to forget i miss you. sometimes i wish i could die so i'd never see your stupid ******* face again but i know if i go through with it, i'm stuck with you forever.

and recently, i haven't been eating, drinking, sleeping because i know if i do, it'll remind me of you.

If you cry inside your bedroom
And there is nobody around to hear you
Do you still make a sound?

You are at the foot of your bed
The pieces of a broken mirror
Surrounding you like makeshift stars
You build yourself a galaxy to drown in
And maybe you cried for salvation
Or maybe you cried out of pain
Or maybe you cried on the ****** chance
That someone will hear

You are at the foot of your bed
The claw marks on your chest
Making you look more savage than ever
You howl at the moon
But it is so dark
And the sky is so vast
And the moon was never there to begin with

You are at the foot of your bed
And you know
That your house was built on thin walls
And you keep waiting for
A knock on the door
Or a voice telling you to stop
Or any indication that someone heard you
And you know, oh you know
It's never gonna come

If you cry inside your bedroom
And there is nobody around to hear you
Do you still make a sound?

Does it matter?
You are still alone

"What inspires you?"
He asks as her eyes begin to light up
She starts thinking about
all the worlds that her imagination
has led her to
and all the places
real, and fictional,
that she longs to see.
Her mind shoots across the galaxy
and she thinks about
Poetry and Space
High fantasy adventures with elves and magic
Her eyes sparkle with stars
that could be other worlds
Far Far away
Her passions bubble up
with volcanic heat
she pictures all her heros
from Athena, to Bilbo
and he says again
"What inspires you?"
she says gently
"Are you sure you want to know?"