Deep breaths as I stand by the sea
Each step colder as I draw closer
Debating on what direction to take
Trying to ignore my feelings
As my head and I argue on the choice to make
My head reminds me of love and warmth
And the dream of a home built on mutual admiration
It then reminds of how every kiss and hug sparks butterflies and chemistries
But then I present my case
Telling my head that things are not what they appear to be
Calling my feelings as a witness
Testifying that sadness comes after every expression of desire
Loneliness comes after every proclamation of love
And yet a sight draws me closer
And I become addicted to the drug that is her
I plead for daily doses
Scratching my head as a result of the low supply
Dragging each dose like my life depended on it
And dying inside due to the toxic nature of it
I wake up in different mind cities
Hallucinating a perfect world
Avoiding the reality at all cause
But it’s just my mind that has been corrupted
Blocking my vision of truth
And so I plead with my head to see reason with my feelings
Begging for a chance for therapy
To loosen myself from the bounds of this toxicity
Cause with just a few steps closer towards the sea
There will be nothing left of me
For people see.

I long for myself
and for those I love
and for those I lead
to be like the
wild sequoias.

Let our reach
be high and vertical.
Let our roots
be firm and intertwined.
Let us be
strategically planted
in deep reservoirs.
Let our bark
be thick and resilient.
Let our seeds
be released
and germinated
when the fire comes.

Yes, let us be
an enduring grove,
outliving difficult
seasons and enjoying
the plentiful.

.
If you happen to find a poet
hiding shyly beneath a stone.
Gently put him in your pocket
and carry him safely home.

Show him love and kindness,
take time to get to know him.
And if you smile so sweetly
he will gladly pen you a poem.

For if you hold his real value,
and recognise his true worth.
He'll look deep into your soul,
to give you the sun, moon and earth.

© Pagan Paul (05/04/17)