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345 · Feb 2018
Vanished
Jessa Feb 2018
I search for you
Among the dreams
But never once
You were there
I traced
The scent of you
In this bed
But bitterness
Has washed away
The fragrance of passion
So.....
What's left for me here
To reminisce
When I have nothing
To prove
That you were once
Belonged to me

-Jess
341 · Feb 2018
Rambling of Darkness
Jessa Feb 2018
Suffocated
In this heavy air
Choked
With more lies
I shut
All doors to my heart
You won't find me
For the window to my soul
Has been closed
There's nothing
You can see in me
Just this pure darkness
With the voices of nightmare
Run away
Because I might stain you
With my sins
Don't turn back
For I might burn you
In my hell
Just spit your shame on me
For this curse
Gladly ...... I'll carry to my grave

-Jess
329 · Aug 2016
Living with Memories
Jessa Aug 2016
Standing here
At the crossroads
I don't know
Which way to go
I'm lost
Scared.....
But alone
This journey must go on
So I take a step
Moving forward
But it's too heavy
For I'm dragging
The past with me
Reminiscing us
For it's what keep me going
And I'm still
Carrying your name with me
For my strength
Lies within those alphabets
Forgive me
Because I couldn't let go
But please allow me
To live with our memories

-Jess
319 · Sep 2015
Faded Memory
Jessa Sep 2015
Just like the wind
The laughter we had is vanished
Into the air

Just like ashes
The pages of our story turned into dust
Scattered all over the place

And just like the mist
The memories we created
Gone forever killed by the sunrise

-Jess
305 · Feb 2018
Phantom of the Past
Jessa Feb 2018
It seems like
I'm the ghost of the past
That keeps haunting your night
Because you still
Search for me
In every dream
In every thought
Even in your nightmares
How I wish
For you to let go
How I pray
For your restless sleep
To come to an end
But I guess
This won't be over
For I'm still holding on
To old promises
So will you gaze
Upon the stars
And resuscitate me
Soul to soul
Heart to heart
For I yearn to be
More than a phantom
In your life

-Jess
303 · Nov 2016
You Will Never Know
Jessa Nov 2016
Do you know what it’s like
To live with misery
Nightmares within reality
A constant fight
To stay awake so you won’t be killed
By insanity

Do you know what it’s like
To swallow **** from time to time
And not being able to puke
So it becomes your food
From day to day

My soul……
Has become the nest for wrath
My heart…..
Turned into the blackest pit of hatred
Tears has been dried
And I speak in silence
For this voice of mine
Has been sacred long after
My tongue stopped uttering a word

I’m not strong
Nor I’m weak
I’m barely hanging on
Helplessly here…..
Waiting to be invited
To rest…… for eternity

-Jess
297 · May 2016
Another Ashes of Love
Jessa May 2016
Opened up my heart
Just to be hurt
Once more
What a fool I am
For believing in lies
And now  
I'm trapped again
In this painful solitude
Grieving over
Another death of love
Scattering
The ashes of burning pages
I sealed my heart
With determination
This time......
It's gonna be forever
For I've thrown
The key
Deep inside the ocean of sorrow
Never to be found
So never again
I could be killed
By the tongue of a man


-Jess
295 · Feb 2018
Will You.....
Jessa Feb 2018
I long to hear
You whisper my name
With passion
Though I know
That kind of ecstasy
Would never be mine
But.....
Will you pretend
That you love me
Only this one night
Will you try
To hide your sympathy
And show me
A little feelings of affection
Not too much.... but just enough
Before we say goodbye
For eternity
So tell me.... will you?

-Jess
293 · Feb 2018
Toxicity
Jessa Feb 2018
Not a holy woman
Nor the devil I am
But still
Loving me
Has become your sin

Not a heaven’s man
Nor the demon you are
But still
Living with you
Has become my hell

Blood on my lips
Poison in your tongue
Still we kiss
Still we taste each other
Venom we are
But never a monster

Is this love
When our chemistry
Reacts disastrously
Or is it passion went wrong
When too many particles
Involved in our destiny

Toxic we are
But I guess
We’re addicted to misery
High with doubts …. Maybe
But still we drown
In the sea of love

-Jess
292 · Apr 2018
All Over Again
Jessa Apr 2018
Every time
These eyes peering
Into yours
I couldn't help
To fall in love with you
Over and over
For there's such truth
Within the window
Of your soul
Where I can see clearly
That my name
Was engraved beautifully
On your heart
How your smile
Melted away my fear
To take another step
In this journey of love
Hold this gaze
A little bit longer my love
For you'll find a home
Within me
A throne with a crown
Which I preserve
Only for you to reign
Because....
I have no regret
For falling for you
All over again

-Jess
288 · Aug 2016
Memoir of Love
Jessa Aug 2016
Holding the pillow
Close to my chest
For my heart
Has shattered into pieces
Knowing.....
I'm losing you
Realizing......
You're fading away
From my life
Gone with the wind
But the memories
Stay with me
Scriptures we wrote
Will never be erased
For we left our souls
Within those words written
A memoir of love
Between you and me

-Jess

— The End —