Full moon shining silver light
Over head it named tonight
Underneath swirls of grey
Outside the doors have called my name
The twilight spoke in a golden tongue
Over and over it must be done
****** fingers captivate
Condemning the beast to demonstrate

New strings visible on naked hands,

A sense of the poignant moments,

Memories intertwine like these strings,

They loop forever forward



My memories don’t serve me well,

An excuse to repeat mistakes of the past,

I request time for an audience, to stop its duties,

But it won’t heed my call, I am forward-bound



Blaring music from the ends of the room,

The revelers enjoy and soak in the atmosphere,

A confetti clouded room with youthful ebullience,

The disco ball spins around forward



The sky glows tonight,

Thunderstorms and fireworks dance together,

A night to celebrate your existence,

For another year, you move forward.

My words don’t appear like my mind visualizes,

A speech-impaired philanthropist swings inside,

Tonight, the hailstorm rides the waves,

I am not on the same page, inside.



My thoughts wander on that plane,

An unforgotten tune lingering in the rain,

Leaving this mere mortal on this plane,

How I wish I can leave this pain.



I need the cover of the Carpathian mountains,

And beyond in the realm of darkness,

Ambient sounds and the tragedy of dropping rain,

I need to leave this page, struggling madness.



Before I leave, I need to confess,

That what the heart had desired for long,

To be on a journey, with my obsessed,

I wish you were on the same page, forever after

What may come, with fire or water,

The Earth can swallow me tonight,

I perish with all that remains, written on this page.

Atrocities bind my humans,
A death race to finish the rat race,
Vicious vigilantes cover your demons,
The premier guides you to your dream ace.

Red stains on the brown sand,
Earth that once sheltered and shimmered,
Skies that rained onto land,
Artillerymen break the silence of the sacred

We push through floods and quakes,
Dancing with grief as we all bilk,
Life plays out like a bowl of flakes
You dunk the spoon and spill the milk

Have you not heard?
No use crying over spilled blood

The sands will dance on your grave,
A ravaging scene of thoughtful revenge,
Grains of sand will fill your grave,
A tormented scene of destined revenge

The broad daylight will be your silent killer,
No more will you hear of the plague,
They light brown winds of a thriller,
A plan that was deemed too vague

The sands have shaped your silhouette,
A deep dark brown dot of an existence,
Lands before time have had this dragnet
You have been dusted out of existence!

Tones of green for envy
Red for passions fire,
Blackness for obscurity
And rougeness for desire
Yellow colours buttercups
In happiness and glee
But whiteness for the purity
of your heart's charity.
Pink depicts your girliness
Gold means you are rich
But grey brings out the trouble
When, occasionally, you're a *****,
Tangerine for tittiness
And gingerness your ****....
Oops! Now I'm in deep do-doos
For I've painted...quite enough!
M.

Love
It's like a peaceful white dove
Attacking you and ******* emotions at you from above
It makes you go crazy and insane
And when you've been defeated and ripped to shreds,
You feel like disappearing and pulling the trigger on your brain

Bound.
For hell,
Oh life is swell,
ain't it?
piece of art, tainted.
Convos with Satan,
Can you feel the cadence?.

Can you smell the melody?
Can you touch the tunes?
Can you taste the frequency, grab you some silver spoons.
Grab you a piece of advice, from the man on the moon.
Falling under the depths, ill have to handle it soon,.

Convos with Lucifer,
Lord of the Flies..
How'd he get my number?
probably family ties..
probably hearing the cries,
probably feeling surprised,
The light within me, forever will shine.

But for tonight,
i converse with The Anti-Christ..
Actually giving me some mad advice.

he said,
"I advise you, don't you ever find bliss..
If one day you do, you'll forever be ******.
Instead, stay in this chaos and revel,
Truthfully your bliss might become your hell."

How can you ask for sunshine if its always sunny?
How can you laugh at something if its always funny?
.......
suddenly i realized the ******* was right.
Only if hell bound, do you realize that heavens in sight.


-afj

Suffering from keeping feelings bottled up inside.
Suffering from pride.
Suffering from drinking bottles and using them as guides.
Suffering from lies.

Suffering from failure, I've used one too many tries..
Suffering from cries.

A nomad in disguise..

Walking along the common folk hoping the tears dry.
On the edge of a steep cliff ..just hoping my fears fly..

hoping they spread wings, and glide over the plains..
pass thru all the Midwest and land somewhere in Maine..
Like....
Why doesn't my destiny manifest?.
I'm done living as an observer and analyst..

I often wondered why the dreams of mine seemed far..
Finally learning memories are more important than dreams are..

& thats word to the wise,
Though the wise will dispute my claim..
But you see, dreams come and go some never are seen again...

Yet memories, are stored, in the storage room of your mind,
Where you can see, your feelings played out though the brain is blind,
where you can nurture, and torture your own self at will,
where you know exactly where your skeletons are hidden and still....

Would you rather lose memories or dreams?
Perhaps i suffer from this dilemma, or so it seems...



Why not keep both? Asked Alexis one day...

A month later, the Fates music decided to play..
...
without warning, her life& dreams taken away..
now all i got is memories,
memories to suffer and pray.


-afj

You are not real
anymore,
you are not mine
forever;

instead, you are
disintegrating
as I strip apart the memories
and shake out
the sadness -
not a real
sadness, but an emptiness
I may never understand

so I'll write until I do,
or until I've erased
the last traces of you