You can sense the sincerity in my breathe when i speak of my tragedies..
i wonder how life would be if i was born living lavishly?..
born with riches, and jewels, a chandelier and marble floor...
curtains, and high ceilings and a kitchen with French decor..
some of us start off with torn sneakers.
others born with nutritionist, and fitness teachers,
no i'm no preacher..
and no i'm not bashing the privileged..
but why pillage the fallen village, ?
so let me finish.
the human experience.
go to school for 20 years, work for another Thirty.
at best you'll retire at 65 and thats early..
Barely paid your house, finally own your vehicle...
only to enjoy it for a couple years and you see it go??
cus then you get sick, and your dead at Seventy..
who can uncover lifes secrets who has the remedy?
I think its out there somewhere but nobody is telling me..
till then, ill stay humming this silly melody.
"All lives matter!"
...Yelled the Jew before he entered the burner..
Said the slaves, marching with Turner..
murmured, the young Aztec girl raped by a pervert..
sobbed, the young Taliban, in the shop where they lured her.
All lives matter,
...Wrote, a Japanese man while he attended a camp..
preached a Muslim teacher when they made fun of her stamp..
sang a Haitian boy, starving..it was more of a chant..
funny how you can eat turkey, Native Americans CANT.
All Lives Matter..
said the Muslim grandfather, just catching a plane..
said the young white women, enlisted in the army for change..
I say all lives matter, with pride and have my fist out...
but with no papers..according to Trump ill be kicked out..
my life matters, all lives matter..
but isn't it sad...?
its not the white thing to say...but some lives never have.
Inscribed, in my heart..
bible verses, in cursive i know my purpose..
cursed are those who lay curses, and purchase purses that cost more than the life of a person..
But its all Gucci..
New Jordans on my feet, so they might shoot me.
Ironic huh,? after all the shots Michael took...
seen so much misery i might write a book..
Name it: When Life is Shook...
battle depression, my blades sharper than my foe though..
Yet they wonder why i never tend to smile in my photo,
they wonder why i hate social media, and society..
they wonder why im so mysterious, maybe its the Mayan me,
maybe its the eye in me..
i used to think God himself was denying me..
now i know that God never lies, he just lies in me.
not religious though, this isn't my confession to faith..
I've sinned to much to get passed the heavenly gates,
Besides, i saw heaven once, splitting an 8th..
probably the reason why im up still, riddling late..
cus truly my lifes a riddle,
So i write what i live...
So glad at 22 i havent had me a kid..
cus i barely know myself, and i still have to grow up..
how dare i ever preach truth, and be a father that dont show up?
But now im just rambling, i vent so i could sleep..
i know this isnt poetry..but poems take me deep..
in my mind, and my emotional ocean i hate to dive in..
but currently im swimming, ill tell you when i've arrived in..
They never see the hollow me..
deleted twitter, but i want you guys to follow me..
Usually up late,
worrying about my luck, wait..
there's a starving child somewhere..
meanwhile i just ate..
Pissed, cus my phone bills high, And my ex girl is taken...
meanwhile a small girl in Nepal still feels her world shakin...
Going 80 on the freeway, i just wanna bowl now..
While the folk down in Philly prayed the train would slow down...
Bothered by the shade of a new building...
while people in Haiti are still building..
while i buy building blocks for my nephew, hes 1.
while the people down in Baltimore burning buildings for fun...
burning building for fun?
Whys the CVS big, but the school with no funds?
but they say the solution is, taking the guns...
they took the guns in Chicago, but left fatherless sons.
Eyebrows on fleek but societies bleak.
the devil takes a seat in a heavenly street..
now were all cursed, but im watching netflix on my sofa..
Chilling bumping Sosa, living by the park where they raped my neighbor Rosa..
Gotta remind myself daily...that im blessed to a fault..
because theres stillborn babies, whose heads rest in a vault..
boys in Africa begging for bread, while i toast my bimbo..
on the beach enjoying summer the waters too cold to swim though..
while in New Orleans they had to jump in regardless..
but all my worry is, if my sister can pass her BAR test..
So next time i wanna vent under my AC vent...
i stop and think, shit i dont even have to pay rent..
I dont gotta work doubleshifts and im never hungry..
plus a got a couple people who really love me..
Next time that i wanna complain..
Ill scale my struggle on a real measure of pain.
we was in the bando,
trappin, we were trapped..
cook named Orlando,
moved across the track..
used to be my neighbor, now hes got the paper,
owns a couple barbershops, got myself a taper,
owns a deli too, couple cleaners down the main street,
not long ago we were sitting in the same seat..
we was in the bando,
trappin, we were trapped..
kitchen hot too handle,
Found ourselves a rat..
polices, driving by increases...
Orlando had a thesis,
Moved in with his nieces..
"Theyll never catch me in here,
I live without fear,
only time i cry is with this tattoo tear"
A couple days later, cops broke the door in,
couple windows too, just to let more in,
they found a couple rifles, most of them foreign...
Cuffed Orlando, his niece, and his babymomma Lauryn...
multiple charges of distribution.
couple cases of murder...
money laundering, and weapons, his attorney would murmur...
They say my writing sucks, this is no place for this crap..
i dont do poetry, i just write reality rap..
and truthfully, nowadays reality lacks.
So i dedicated this to his daughter Natalie Max.
25 to life..
no chance of parole, bottle....
just cus he was my role model..
They say how can you defend him, when i yell free Orlando..
cus i still remember when..
we was in the bando...
like a desert, in the middle of July..
I wonder why..
Your arms stretch out, touching every grain of sand hidden...
keeping warm, even the most cold forbidden...
given a chance to,
be nurtured by the life the desert springs in summer...
an oasis, endless in its love, precious in its wonder..
warmth never felt this warm before,
even as a child under blankets when i feared..
and unlike the blankets, you would never disappear..
heaven is, the feeling of gentle protectiveness,
calmness and power..
ability to devour an hour..
simply spending time describing that one particular flower...
Because were not the huggy type, never one to show affection..
momma never kissed us but she gave us her protection..
never said i love you, but we never went hungry..
I got a job at 14 and she never asked for funding...
Quit a career, hopped the border left her favorite shoes behind..
all just so her seeds planted had a chance to see divine..
and even when theres happy times she never says its fine..
still she prays to God, in times of troubles every time...
what does heaven feel like? ......
that moment once a year when we embrace...
its almost mothers day, i can see it in your face..
Love endless and pure...
She'll never know, but all the good i do is for her,
and of that im sure, of that im sure..
Momma, I believe in heaven,
heavens my cure.
Excuse me, bae...
As i explain my vision...
I was drowsy probably drinking but i still recall the mission,
I had traveled in the future, saw you and I were married,
I know that we just met im not getting overcarried..
And lemme tell why its real..in case you dont believe it..
Back then i had a vision of our very first meetin...
And i remember it clear, the only difference was your outfit..
But the setting was the same, blue curtains, black couches..
I tell you,
im being more than honest when i say..
i see a future witchu,
i want more than just a bae..
You ask me how it is i have such visions of what will be...
But bae its such a secret, i just need your heart to feel me..
I know you dont want secrets, i wanna tell you, really...
but if i tell you how i know, you might just have to kill me..
You see im from the future..i just travel to the past...
so i can live it all again, and keep hoping this will last..
Truly just to feel your love all over again...
And thats the truth about our story i wont ever pretend...
She said..."but i thought we were together in the future..why is it that you gotta come back just to see me?"...
Bae, we were together in future...
but your contract ended early and God decided you should leave me..
so in the future, your my guardian angel..
Always had the heart of an angel..
so i came back for one last kiss and a thank you.
My Guardian angel♡