with a foot firm on clean ground and
another in the ocean,
stretch fingers clear and
hold back hold back- am i really so
rusted out? this
salt erodes
my corrosions,
nobody will
make sure i've got
any vital sign
and still
can't figure out how to cry.

sharp wreathes like
all these 'could's hang,
thick like enveloping
void or city walls or
another jigsaw port i bind to:

why are my insides so
untouched yet torn in rend? i only
feel in whispers from the other
side of an endless warehouse, or
in railway spikes driven through
the side of my skull.

wound down, held back,
and made of iron filings,
wishing for nothing but
nothing.

all these hours to burn;
still, it is i built of but scar tissues.

Have you felt that thing.
When you're with someone,
its like an explosion.

Something just changed,
it erupted and changed your course.

Looking into their eyes,
its no longer just an ***** in sockets
but browns flaked with yellows
in an unending ocean of desire and love.

And its so wonderful you can't explain it.
They say its love but sometimes you think its more.
Something no one else on the planet but you two feel.

Its the most wonderful thing in the world.

-Alicia Hubert

I released your love some months ago,
but before I knew it you had come fleeting back.

Like a bird with a broken wing,
I took you in and cleaned you up.
Fixed some parts and nursed you back to health.

The beginning of this new relationship dazed me.
I lost my mind in the infatuation of my personal reality.
The man I had cried over for months,
the one I yearned for and wrote about everyday,
returned to my arms and was as warm and loving as ever.
How did my dreams come to life?

With any dream though,
I had to wake up.

It took two months.
Two months to wake up from the daze I lived,
two months to switch my emotions
from being lost in the daze and snapping into reality
faced with confusion.

How did we go back to who we were so fast?
How did the problems of our old relationship catch up to the future?
How did we go from pure bliss to groping towards each others neck just to make each other stop talking?

Why am I turning to the internet for advice on what is wrong?
Why am I finding truth on sites that say that this is an unhealthy relationship?
Why are we getting 9/10 on questions that ask if your relationship is unhealthy?

Baby.
You dazed me with your love and compassion that moment you came back to me
but you shortly followed it up with my head spinning and my mind slammed with confusion.

We do not have a time machine so why are you trying to bring up the past?
I'm looking for happiness and you're tearing it down.
If we don't fix this were going to **** each other emotionally.

I love you and I honestly think that I'll love you till I die.
But darling that doesn't mean we have to be together till we die.