As the sun awakes,
I rub my tired eyes,
I slip on my slippers,
Then turn to face you.
You are still asleep,
Dreaming dreams of heaven,
Of love,
And us.
I start to move,
But a hand touches my hand.
So soft
So gentle
You have have awoken.
You say:
Please stay
And be with me.
I look down and see your face
Smiling so much
How could I say no?
Coming back,
I snuggle into you.
One small Eskimo kiss just for you.
I stay and lay
I listen and feel
The heart beat that we make.
It is just so real.
Then all around everything fades.
I wake up.
Its just a dream.
I cry and I look up to the heavens.
Please.
Grant me my dreams.
And I fall back asleep to dream once more.

This is where I go to think,
The isle of banished dreams,
A place long forgotten,
But bursting at the seams,
I come here to think,
I come here to wade,
In the waters of regret,
In here I feel at peace
But no not just yet...
I come here to banish all those pointless goals,
To let go of al those broken dreams,
This place is always locked from me,
But sadness is the key
This place,
This place, is always open unto me...

This place, I come to lose myself in fears,
In anxieties, in dilemmas, all those wasted years,
I come to think, and let my tears build the sea,
This place,
This place, is the true definition of me...

I come here to wonder,
To sit in the sand,
To wonder if I'll ever leave again,
I stare up at the clear night sky,
I wonder and ask "Father can I leave?"
Can I leave this place of sorrow,
where my tears build the sea?
Can I leave this place of tragedy,
where my doubts grew the trees?
Can I leave this place where my questions
and dreams are the sand
and litter this beach?  
Father can I come home?...

I sit here in the dawn of night,
Sitting, questioning, is it ever worth the fight?
I sit here and ponder,
and let the ghosts of my broken dreams
come to my aid,
I feel fractured, hollow, unmade,
I let the voices swirl around me and scream
in my face,
"YOU COULD HAVE DONE BETTER!!"
They bellow and shriek,
I hear all of them,
I take in their council,
I understand their speak,
They speak of my wrongs,
They speak of my failures
I've given them reason,
I'm the reason they're here...

I come here to wallow in my pain,
To wash off all hope,
To be clean once again,
I come here to question to ponder to search,
To want to be better so I walk and I think,
Think along the waters edge,
Along this beach of broken dreams and
fears,
I hope I don't sink,
I want to be better,
I want to be great,
These dreams, these morals, they have yet
to break
I cling to them dearly,
As I tear out my heart, and feed it to the sea,
I want it to drown there,
But it always returns,
It always comes back,
My heart is half the reason I'm here,
It takes you by the hand,
and whispers in your ear,
And you follow it without fail,
Through storm, through fire, with no hope of
prevail,  
I follow it too,
I follow it in and out of this place every time,
She controls it, "Your heart is mine",
She knows it very well,
It's the reason I'm here, this place
This hell...

I walk deeper, and deeper into this place,
To  find where I've hid it,
I must find that place,
It's new every time, but yet, somehow the same,
This thing holds my future, it is my fate,
When I find it I can leave this place,
I can't find it here, not here, nor there,
It's inside me and I must find it but where,
where WHERE?!
It's not a key, but it is of sorts,
It's more of a conclusion, an answer, to why
I'm here,
I feel it close,
Im almost here...

I'm almost here, it's very close, it's very near,
I've thought, and thought, for what feels like years,
I want to come back stronger than before,
I've done it before, and I'll do it once more
These voices I've unleashed that storm inside my head
and help me think,
They help me, they've shown me the way ,
The way back up,
From down here below,
Im leaving now to return soon,
But for now I'm gone,
Until the next blue moon...

I am not sure
What you are doing.
If you are trying to help or trying to ****.
You think you know me
You may be wrong.
To **** is death
And death is darkness.
Oh how our hearts have darkened
I now see no light.
You have taken it
You stolen it
And you have buried it.
Now I have no hope
No light
No happyness.
You said u knew me,
Well you were wrong.

I had a choice to make,
But I blew it.
I should have picked
The one that knew.
Being this hurt tells a lot
To me,
This is it
This is the best fit.
You knew it would work out.
You knew that everything would be
Alright.
I was suborn
Naïve
Stupid
And selfish.
I only can hope now
That it isn't too late
To make another choice,
The final choice.

So torn apart
So confused and cursed
Like blood in my veins
I'm hot and tempered.
To much to say
To much to cry,
Like rivers in spring
I flood with the cold.
What is happening
To my beautiful self
That I once knew?
What happened to my thoughts
That were ever so clear.
My heart and mind, like cat and dog
Fight each other until one is hurt.
Confused and scared
I don't know what to do!
Waves that crash
And words that speak
Hit me with darkness
and with fright.
I want to scream and I want to cry
Dear God in heaven
why is this here?!
Why is this now?!
I'm hurt and in pain
Does no one understand?
I am dying and no one is there.
Please God, will people only watch and stare?