Don't flatter yourself. You aren't any special a human being. But, I fail to explain this to my heart, for it beats at an opposite tune to my disagreeing. I have had conversations with it, deep and intense. It refuses to budge and has a strong defence. I rest my case every single day, for I am a poor Prosecutor. The Judge, my mind holds its hands up, every single time.
Guess, the heart wants what it wants.
Court dismissed.

Don't look at this as a poem
Because it doesn't hold the depth or breadth
Of passion and emotion contained within a poem.
On the contrary, this is just a series of free-form thoughts
Scribbled onto a page.

To begin, I remember that first time
That I caught sight of you,
And you know as well as I
That it would be a lie if I said I wasn't taken.
But, I've always found that beauty isn't the jewel in the crown,
That it's what's found inside that brings happiness alive.

It all began that second time around,
Your first tower day, mine to be around you,
The first time that I got a breeze of who you are,
And you were a fresh gust of life, an amazing sight,
Even if my guess set you years too young.

As time has moved across this summer,
You've never ceased to inspire wonder in every way,
Watching the depth of your personality bloom the more I knew,
Bringing with it an increased maturity and age,
Changing the view and altering the light
In which I perceived you, this magnetic girl.

Bringing me to the "and now" part, as our days have wound down,
As you're being drawn along towards the door
That leads you out of town, city, and state,
I realize that I've only seen the summary
Compared to all there really is to see of you,
And I hate the thought of what I'm missing out on.

When all is really gone and said and done,
I barely know you.
I've spent hours with you in the tower
Guiding you towards new responsibility,
But that's not fully me or you.
Being tied to this mentor-mentee formality
Has slowed my feet in regards to you.

So as you go off to bigger and better things,
Remember, that if you ever want to get to know me,
That I'd very much enjoy the opportunity to know you better,
Possibly at some point when you come home this winter.

With all that said, know this,
That becoming friends with someone as smart and caring, as compassionate,
- not to mention goofy, silly, funny (read genuine) -
as you,
Is the greatest gift given this summer.

So with this fall, I wish you luck - the best of it,
Though I have my doubts that you'll need it
Seeing as how successful and able you've been
In every walk of life you've met yet.

             With all that,

                            Best Wishes,

                                                       ...

It will come to everyone, at some stage in their life, an instant stoppage of time, where images blur and fade away only to convescale into tight focus stabbing deep with a sharper pain.

That one thought that paints a thousand pictures of silent screams that no one heard. That instant when you knew all the words you spilled are only piling up as a mound of dirt.

A moment of clarity as clear as the centre of a bubble. That one moment in time when you ask yourself...
am I really that unloveable?

that will be the whisper of a small voice inside an empty space. It's the same question you'll ask of the mirror while looking at the same face.

That one inner warning that hits with piercing clarity. It will come to you, rest assured, when your lost and alone and you don't want charity,
you won't want pity or useless platitudes spilling from dead lips that leak poison from inside. You just want one person, just one, to hear what you say and hold your hand and not try to hide.

That one moment in time should not be a reoccurring event,
but when it is, the shock is less, you become just that little more hardened, and less hell bent,
to share your life and your feelings
and your heart.
It really is a lesson that should be learnt from the start.