these rustling leaves
         — as if the wind is saying hello to me
i can smell the creek from afar
      — and it jolts a memory in my mind
cold
        sad
              almost drowning
i was barely ten
but i was glad i was alive
but i won't be anymore if it happen again now

i can easily run away into the woods
     and
            make
                        all
                              my
                                      fears

                   d i s a p p e a r

i just wanna start again
with nothing to worry in my head
and make it as clear as this cold, running water

oh, what a time to be alive.

here's to a part of me
who could recite A to Z without taking a break
and another one that has to stop to think
what comes after G
G stands for "get well soon, i hope it won't tire you up", said me to me.

sometimes i talk too fast
i can't even breathe properly
my friends ask me what am i saying
because all they hear is wrecking noise in voice
i want to crawl into my system to fix what is wrong with me
to make me less complicated
and more tolerant to coffee.

tick-tock-tick-tock
it is always the end of the world for me
i already start writing my own obituary.
but guess what?
i am not always like this
sometimes the ocean in me is calm enough for me to live normally,
i just wish i get to know
when the next hurricane is coming.

sometimes it's lonely to be on your own
sometimes it's lonely to be out there
who's gonna hold your hands when it gets too cold?
and who's gonna console your broken heart?

but everyone has their own demons to tend to,
and it's okay to be alone sometimes
but don't get too used to it
because loneliness is addictive
and no one can save you from yourself when it's too late

---- sometimes