I long for the day when your name no longer brings me pain

i am not sure who i am
i am not sure what happened
i am not sure where i am  
i am not sure when things will be alright again
i am not sure how i got here

Oh but God ******* ****** we laugh at the same things and have the same songs stuck in our heads and being with you feels like being wrapped in blankets sitting in a window seat watching a thunderstorm but I remind you of last week’s newspaper and a sock that’s missing its mate I’m dust under feet and you’re ******* sunlight

If I take an ibuprofen will it it stop the pain in my heart?

but why does breathing feel like a burden?