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hariny Nov 2014
i made myself at home with how warm your voice sounded
i only spent a second under your roof
and i never felt more loved than i ever did
i told myself a million times to never open up
to anyone that looked like home
and now that i found you
i am terrified of living on the streets when you are gone
someone asked me what is home and i almost said your name
hariny Nov 2014
you
the thought of you
used to bring a smile to my lips
but now the same thought
brings tears to my eyes

(h.u)
  Sep 2014 hariny
Alexandria Nefertiti
I need you to be sick
without me
Because this is what the thought
of without you
does to me.

I need you to mentally replay
our encounters conversations and videos
Because this is what I do
when I can't talk to you.

I need you to taste me before seeing me
because I always feel and taste you.

I need you to hear my voice
when I'm not around.
Because I'm tired
of feeling crazy
about you.

I need you to understand
that the little things you do
are always noticed
and they all have little shrines
in my mind.

I need you to know
that I'm an attention *****
and although I like to share
sometimes I want to be stingy
with your time.

I need you to know
that when you're upset with me.
I feel needles in my chest and I can't breathe
it’s an incredibly slow burn.

I need to know
Do you truly love me to
the depths that I love you?
Can your truly promise your desire and passion won’t fade?
Will you always be my best friend?
Will I be yours till the end?

Because if you can’t answer yes
to all of my requests.
Then my love is in vain,
And you should leave me alone
And hope for the impossibility
That my love will wane.
  Sep 2014 hariny
Q
I would put my hand into your chest
And rip your heart out, watch it beat
Because there must be something about it
That makes you so impossibly unique.

I wish I could keep you up until early morning
I wish I could talk until you forgot about sleep
Because that's when the deepest, darkest conversation
Is finally, finally let free.

I want to amaze you until you can't think
Of a single snarky phrase
And keep on amazing you
For years, and centuries, and days.

I want to let you break me
In all the ways I want to shatter you
And when we're both blood and dust
We'll grab the duct tape and glue.

I want to know you like no one has
Until I know every word you'll ever say
Until your mind and my mind
Become our mind in the best of ways.

I want to spend years memorizing
The way you say my name
Because, as much as I hate it,
The way you say it isn't the same.

I want to memorize your genome
I want to know all of what made you exist
Because when I can't sleep
I'll recite the entire list.

I want to sit with you in silence
Without a hint of uncomfortableness
Because there are words in every breath
That passes through your nose or lips.

I want to describe you in detail
Until a stranger could find you in a crowd
Because I'll never experience a pride
Quite like knowing you brings about.

I want to see your smile
And hear your laughter until I die
Because, come good or bad with us,
You'll still be what gets me by.

I want to frown at you
And cry and scream and shout
Because I'll never quit this fake smile
Until you shut it down.

I want to argue with you
Over the opinions you don't accept
Because I didn't know all your thoughts before
And I don't know them all yet.

I want to show someone
That this is what I feel
Because, when it's too dark to see outside,
I can't help but believe it isn't real.
At this point, I should probably just make a collection of the poems I've written about him, because this couldn't possibly get more pathetic.
hariny Sep 2014
you were like fire
giving me warmth when i was cold and stuck in the dark
but i was too wrapped up in the comfort you gave me
to realise that all this time
you were burning me alive

(h.u)
my mother always told me to never play with fire but i just could not help it

— The End —