They say that over time, it dissipates -
it will drain from you, evaporate like smoke.
It will descend upon you, destroy you;
but will soon release you, and fade.

But with time it instead grows stronger,
demanding to be felt.
It knocks on the doors of my soul,
its urgency to be let inside unrelenting and ruthless.

Like an unpredictable storm, it lands and ravages,
leaving just fragments of a heart already rebuilt.
What is gone is the will;
the resiliency dulled, the courage spent.

It's a deep-rooted ****, an unrivaled opponent;
It's a malevolent fire that refuses to be smothered.
The Hurt:
a wound that permeates, and remains.

Do I look pretty? Cause I haven't been eating.
Let me back up, because I swear it wasn't intentional
it's just that it makes me angry
that I have to
and it makes me angry that you care
and it makes me angry that it makes me angry
because its all I ever wanted anyone to do.

I'm angry at school, and my friends, and my dad, sure.
but the worst of all is that I'm angry at myself

this one song plays in my head
but it's just one line repeating
again and
again
*I'll be hanging from a rope, and I will haunt you like a ghost

Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate.
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer’s lease hath all too short a date.
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimmed;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance, or nature’s changing course untrimmed.
But thy eternal summer shall not fade
Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow’st;
Nor shall death brag thou wand’rest in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou grow’st,
    So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
    So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.

Waking in the cool sand.
Tide coming in.
Moonlight and emptiness.
No not emptiness.
Life is everywhere you just can't see it
Sharks are feeding.
Stars are burning
Fish are hiding.
Waves crashing on the shore.
I Lay alone. My friends are somewhere else
I lay in the cool, powdery sand.
Soft and caressing.
I look at the stars and sing amazing grace softly
Without notice my eyes tear up.
I think of Pepaw.
God took you this Easter.
I think if what you stood for.
I think of Jesus.
More tears.
I think of my faults. My sins.
I realize I am strong.
Independent. Though I yearn for love I can wait.
I Can be happy with my flaws and body.
No more insecurities.
I never felt so free.
I am a changed person.
And soon everyone will See.