can you just **** my brains out
and pretend to love me?
I'd greatly appreciate the distraction
the feeling of being wanted
your affection
DEVOUR ME PLEASE
make me feel
anything

anything but this brokeness
this twisted ****

do anything you want to me
just need me
need me
need me
need me

**** the pain away
till I'm numb
till I bleed
till words ceast to exist

cause I can't stand these thoughts
**** me into oblivion

I don't want to care anymore
I don't care anymore

Im ever so *****
I need you bad
Every time you **** me
It feels so rad

I leave  stains on your neck
There's  whispers exchanged
"She's a ***** and a wreck "
There's no hope for change

I leave my own mark
It  claims you as mine
At first a deep red
But  it fades over time

The sign of my love
shown on your skin
Only way to your heart
In this hell that i'm in

Please understand
The disgrace that i feel
But there's nothing to do,
It's my only appeal

These men,
They don't mind sharing us.
They just don't want to know with who.

The moment of
utopia
Where ragged breath is
  broken
And for a second,
gravity consumes the both of us

Making love,
a sweaty pit stop
between the sheets.
Politicians,
librarians,
directors,
janitors,
authors,
qu­eens,
kings,
moms,
you,
me,
All guilty of this bittersweet act of sticky significance.
All willing to tangle our limbs every night.

Father mosquito
drank my blood
and promised me
that there was a lot
to live for:
***, money,
women, love,
food, water.

But *** is only worth
the ten seconds
after I ***:
the ten seconds
where my body breaks
but not my heart.

And money is an idea
that belongs to someone else.
So, the money I have
never really is mine.
The things I need,
I'll never have.
The things I have,
I'll never need.

I do love the softness of women,
Father Mosquito.
You have understood me
once.

It's just underneath
my skin.

But you say love
and no love
is as important
as self-love.
No lips stitched into mine
is worth the feeling
unless I understand my worth,
and you're currently
*******
it
dry.

What happens when food
loses its taste?
And water is no longer cold?
What happens when
my body fails me?
Drink my blood
since it is yours, too,
father.

It's just underneath
my skin.

She kissed me
not because
she wanted to
but because
she could.

We fell in
love.
Not because
we could
but because
we wanted to.

We made
mistakes.
Not because
we wanted to
but because
we could.

We thought
we were
perfect.
Not because
we could
but because
we wanted to.

I vomited in
the bathroom
of a
Baltimore
7-11
because
sometimes
you cannot
hold it in
much
longer.

Her hands shook
as she held her
mirror
because
sometimes
your reflection
can only
tell you
so much.

My body shook.
Her body stiff.
And when
the bodies
move
the hearts
stop.

She lied some.
I drank words.
The veins
in hands
are maps
to imagined
consciousness.

Really,
it's just
a
*******
*****.

Music to
my ears.
Nervousness
between
blinks.
Noise to
my brain.

She said,
"I love you"
not because
she wanted to
but because
she could.

I said,
"I love you, too,"
not because
I could
but because
I wanted to.