The dust on the floor
Stepped on and ignored
In a pile by the front door
Tracked around and stomped on and  forgotten
I feel helpless and weak
Not sure if I know what I’m doing here anymore
My story has been much to deep
I have sank to the core
The past I had is gone afar
Happiness I once knew
Took off and flew
Like a bird spreading its wings
Flying through the air with no need
Careless and carefree
Able to love whom ever it may need

Would you buy me a yellow bicycle?
If you loved me perhaps you would
Tie me down so I can't float
I get restless and its hard for me to stay
I try not to slip away into the unknown
My soul is youthful
I'm hard to trust
I may spin out of control
But your the one
With slivers in my veins
I taste the pain
Consuming all my truths
With not a choose to choice

The birthing ground is overcome with disease
Plucking poetry from the sea
Whiskey fed shutters pounding against me
My flesh spasms
My arms spread wide out following my track marks
You'll be so proud of me
I will let you love me

I don't need  to love me not tonight
I placed my fear of death into a jar
We can float upon the magic dust
A night we will never forget
I see footsteps in your eyes
Put on your bird tongue
With your beak , peck away at my yellow teeth

His skin was always so baby soft
I would sleep next to him when I felt like I was fallen apart
We where not attached at birth
In fact you couldn't wait to be away from me
You severed your life cord  
I did not nest in your  soul
I had to leave
I didn't try hard enough
Perhaps  when you where a  baby I held you like a gun
I'm your  trigger
Allowing the bullets in my head to erupt
I feel so much hatred towards the boy in a mans body

Hollowed slivers rotting the irises of living things
Meadows of erosion swallowing throat scars
Stranded in a blinded world
Immortality poisoned and blistered
Bittersweet xanax only last so long

Ancient spirits, whispering into the wind
Angels staggering, claiming sorrows
Burning winds stroke the willow trees
Illusions of Galaxies concrete flaws
Blinded birds hatching sunsets
Bones of disease devoured and shamed

An angel in the stomach of poetry
Eating  the spirit that makes me bleed  
Betrayed lips that force me to drink
Blinded hands deprived of touch
The distance of my creed

The wars of love
Stripping my skin
Leaving me useless and afraid
I found my tooth on the clean kitchen floor
I miss filling your mouth with mine
With blood on my face we made love
You sepreate my flesh, blindfolding my mind
An incision seeping scars

As the bird dipped his wings  into the stream
The womb will freeze
He sighs under the hollow sun
The blue bones turn and shift
Remnants of the  cord upturned and gray
As he  crawls gathering strings
With shivers his tailbone is contorted
A putrid button descending down
Motionless melting lungs fading remains
Silently the limbs lay
The feathers spread dancing with pain
As the suffering begins
He reflects the time regretting what could of been

Through a gentle path
Beneath a sanctuary
The soul full of harmony
The smooth river rain
Sweet season you relax
Let be let it sing
Thick mountain dusk
Blossoms into a secret spirit that will seed and then vine
A wild life yet pure
See it shine
Climb, thrive and never wither under this fight
Remember this delicious decay
Linger only as we kiss
Born to bleed poetry
Devour and bring them peace

My hips sweep against your body so light
Tracing the contour of your face
I don’t want to waste time
Let's make this right
My sweet full lips travel to another land
It’s foreign to me but it seems so right
My hands linger in between
I beg and I need
May I borrow your body?
What about your mind?
Can I make it mine?
Drink it up wrap it around a vine
Intertwine our minds let them love
Shall we never be unkind

I felt you  put me on a pedestal
Until the  day you pushed me down
A bridge of bruises spans our time
I kiss the floorboards of broken promises
Pieces of my tooth dance across the floor
Yet, I handed you my spine
A rope of glass shards I can't hold on
The sky is corroded with my pain

Hide me in the sea
I will crawl out of my skin,  so I can finally breathe

Purple stamped sunbeams beneath the arch of the earth
Quivering tears reveals the rays
Grazed willows laced with sun kissed skin
A bloodshot galaxy sputtering stars tucking the darkness in

You unravel the layers of my youth

Taking something that should not want

Looking to find my little pearl

I still like swing sets and baby dolls

My blond ponytails dance on my back

You hold me I  bruise

I shall not mutter a word

In a world full of languages I cant speak    

For I cant see clearly let MY youth be washed away    

I go to embrace the one whos suppose to  protect me

YOU

The rain came and washed it away
All, including the shame
Pieces of you that I can’t claim
The rain came and led me through
Into the night where I did not have a fight
Nothing left to offer
I carry this burden that feels like steel
When our fingertips met I could feel something real
You may think that I don’t see
But were one step away
I have drained all that I use to be
Now I don’t want to feel
I go to the side of the river
Kicking my feet in the pain
I don’t belong
Whispers that come alive
Slip inside this mind of mine

Puddles of blood,  making the leaves red
A muted soft rain flowing
With sparks of stars
Blackbirds are shy tonight
Purple blotches on her face
As her lifeless body lay
With  trauma on her face
I need to cage my mind
What did I do ?

The sword that places the scars
The **** upon the wars
Buttons on your mouth
I'll unsnap them
When you can talk

Your made of dust and nothing more
I can blow you away in a minutes time
Don't get to comfortable
You'll be gone soon  
Hold your breath
I may be back

Don't worry about me
I have just enough oxygen left

Can we be free?
Have unity
No war just peace
Accept others for who they are
Let everyone be real
Hold hands in church with the person next to you
Watch children grow,  teach them morals and beliefs  
Let them  become the future we need
So we could be proud
Educate one another about our backgrounds
Be proud of our color
Not to be ashamed of our mothers
Love and embrace
Let everyone have a chance to be strong
Go visit lost souls
The older man down the road who just lost his wife
Lost his essence, lost his soul
Volunteer your time to help someone in need
Be kind and be true
One day we will all leave this earth
And reside in a home together
Why not get along now
Lets recover

A sunflower  moon
For me to see
Hugging rocks and eating the trees
Kissing the roots
Inhaling the sea

You **** me
With dust that is
You made me hiss and spit
In the moments I hated myself
Dressed to go and a discover a new drug
Sparrows and doves eating me alive
This tree is such a pretty color of pink
I'm sinking in this ocean of lust
The veins are my path
So refreshing and free

Refusing to miss my gear
I undress and I inject
Floating into the clouds the mystery of my way
My fingers catch the highs and lows
Following the crave
As my eyes seem to fall away

Needed to find the last crumbs
I want to be erased fly into rainbows
Talk to the storm tell them I'm all alone
My mind needs a rest
I shall remove it and lay it in the dirt
Where worms can fulfill there hunger that they need
I have not a thing to say
Lets go for a walk paint the town
Is that snow? Make a snowman for me
My head is spinning no it's being eaten by a man
A small man that fits in my hands
He is white and soft
My best friend he knows how things go

Your are hideous and offensive
Why tell me in this state?
One more foolish speed
The little man helps me again
Open my mouth that is covered in blood
I lay for awhile all is still
I hang on to that little guy

He never left my side
I feel cold and lonely
I swirl around there is no sound
Inside I'm screaming but there is no air
I cease to function
I'm confused I'm lost
My eyes have returned yet I can't see at all

I know your alone
But your heading home
Rest your weary soul as your lifted

I often wonder why you were so sad ?
Your no longer an addict with needles in your arms
I hold your hands study your fingers for the last time
Caress the scars on your arms
Pray out to someone that this is wrong
Your little girls
They miss you so
We send you balloons and love
You'll always be a essence of us

I take one then I take two
The feeling is setting in letting me loose
The tears subside my skin starts to feel fine
I take another its so warm
Put my lips on a bottle that never seems to last
Not sure why today
Inside I’m dying of the past
The metal taste on my tongue
Coated white until things start to appear
Will this be the last time my head starts to scream
Devouring all the carnage that I dream
Is this it?
I must ask

That day the moon cried
As your feeble bones were lowered into the ground
I watched all I could do was visualize in my mind ***** needles
That you needed more than I
Lines that traced your body searching for the truth
That was never found
I know you looked into the mirror but could see no reflection
Your sick teeth stained with fear
The weeping willow that began the flood  
It was contaminated
You were just a walking shadow
No fury no sound    
Eyes that didn’t see
You were invited to leave yet you stayed
The pages of my bible are now torn
Inside grieving as you disassociate
I want to purge your name into the sky
I feel so solemn
I feel so lost
Strangled by my own hope
Poison kisses and the hush tones
That I refuse to own  
Caught in deaths net
You did not die alone

I have threaded a thousand sorries into my spleen
My limbs are brittle as the galaxies ache
Unmeasurable stars have fallen from the universe
Bow shaped atmosphere rebirths the sun
Cosmic beauty with a sideways smile
Moon travelers chorus with unidentified sounds
You're my secret ingredient ,my windsock
I would reside on the outskirts of the solar system just to gaze at you
Cauterize my brain rocket it into space, I'm a lifelong lover of the stars anyway
Microscopic cells launched into the stratosphere

Fingers dancing across the ribs of truth
The sternum of strength
Gritting my teeth whenever I think of you
Hollowed out heart
Whiskey hot on my lips, where you use to be
Your still my favorite taste
A tinge of you still exists

Why did you try and save me ?
All I wanted to do is forget
Why did you pull me out of the tub?
Throwing away my pills, when I needed them to feel
Losing my clothes and your trust
I acted like a ***** for drinks ,never had to pay
This is a shame that will never go away
Let me silently submerge into stillness
I will not flail my arms or cause a scene
Nor will I inhale for life

Electric dancing with a marching band
Argus eyes with a sneer
Incisive wit with undertones of crazy
A love affair with the sky
Crying out for the moon
Shafts of sunlight crossing the skyline
As my dreams go to sleep

I creep past the sunlight
Reflecting on the broken miles
Strings of a perfect facade
Mixed with droplets of scars
Clutching on the wingtip of my hymn  
Repugnant moments spew out my drunken dreams
As an sequestered curse replays the tragedy

When I was a little girl, I  skinned my knees
I peel the labels from my beer
Bite my nails, flip my hair, lick my lips
What a ******* tease
Now skinned knees brings in money

Lady melancholy tiptoed delicately through a coast of pearls
Abroad this foreign land,unearthed a valley of intruders
A excursion into the map of my mind
Borderlines swaddles width and magnitude
Interconnection deficiency
Mothers peace fearsome journey
Discovering  hidden truths
Rituals, rites and symbols
Opened by lighting the temperance of truth

Thank for breathing
As tears drown my face
Cold bones now you are somewhere out in the universe
Did you regret closing your eyes?
I'm drinking to numb my brain
Helping me to accept my own way

Surrounded by the great lakes
Perhaps this is why I feel like I'm drowning

I did not mean to hurt you
Nor was it a surprise
That I shoved you away
When you begin to love me its so much to take
With you by my side I want to stand alone
I have an inner fight
Will I be alright?
I feel like I don't belong
The world made us collide in such a place
I try and love you
I try my best
Wallowing in the corner of my heart
I would rather be abused
Then admit that I need you

I ache as the harsh wind rips through my body
I indulge in my own sweetness and condemn my indignation
My tender existence and my delicate heat
I often wonder if I have faded out, like the colorless leaves on the ground
Frightened by the truth that love can bring
The reality of my existence
I know all to well

My ribs,a trap door to my mind
Woven weakness's, cage my hope
Bones of men fight the sunlight
I kissed the moon with cracked teeth
Comets weeping, undone
Snow drops,a psychedelic Violin
Swimming home in a cosmic orb

We are connected you and I
I held you with my spirit and mind
My heart is heavy I miss you so
I know that I don’t have to let you go
I loved you from the beginning and this will never end
I may not see you by sight
But in my heart you always take flight
You get to laugh and play
Mommy will be with you one day
I have envisioned you on so many nights
Fly with the angels my sweet tiny one
Dancing and playing within the clouds
Touching the angel wings as they embrace you near
Your always in my heart as you already know

I bleed out of my womb
Restless and incomplete
No token of contentment
A heart that don’t beat
Out in the distance you can hear the cry
The wailing of the babies
The forgetting of it all
Do I follow or lag behind?
Go into the water watch myself drown
Would I die?
Frantic to stay alive
Consuming the air as I try and shove it into my throat
Breathe don’t choke
What a callous soul you have here
Do you whisper yourself to sleep?
Let the demons control your dreams
Or I’m curious do you hear the screams?

Pitifully shuffling into a pointless destination
Trembling limbs stained grey from old habits
My purpose of life is decaying, following a map with no lines
Speaking with  liquid eyes, unable to face  the truth
These walls are so bare, our bed is stamped with your smell
Sleep has become minuscule and when it does come the dreams rattle me so
I'm lacking oxygen and I could give a ****
The smell of jasmine will not escape my nose
Everyday is a scar and you're just a ghost  that haunts my spirit
I'm back to my bottom shelf selection
You're cordially invited to my scrutinize my demise

Cotton teeth of the god of mountains
The dust of the golden sky
Burning heavy kisses
The ocean slippery from your roots
Breathing  with bursts of smoke
Infinite delicate edge  of whispers
As  the sound of  dawn is gently still

You tore out my heart, and ate it like a sandwich
You cut and gut me like a fish
I needed you more than I needed growth
God's womb planted crab apple trees in me
I had begun to blossom
Unsettling my roots, as fathers branches grasps at me
You would suffocate me just to bring me back to life
His lust outweighed me
My corpse will still taste you
Gods bees will make his honey

Spiny trees dissect the doctrine
Yellowed skulls howling
Graying cheekbones shimmer
Stale jars of smoke gurgling
Pock marked bird skin gasping
Lips of sea grass soiled
Palettes of black and blue astray

Ripples out  in the sea
Skinned deafening pain
As a tragedy blossoms
Unrest days that seemed everlasting
Dandelion eyelids full of fireflies
Miles of wounding prayers
Braches have become weak
A cradle of beliefs that has vanished away