These hands have held many things
Wiped away many tears
Dusted many books
Pushed away many people
These hand have destroyed many opportunities
Created many scars
Drawn many lines
Painted many masterpieces
These hand have been frail many times
Sliced many foods
Written many words
Changed a few lives
These hands have fortified my being
Strengthened my muscles
Danced across many keys
Tried to clean up broken glass
These hands are tired and tried
Broken down
Beat up
And strong
These are the hands that have help
Shape me

I know
I know
you thought it was best
got news for you, *****
*it ******* wasnt

When i go
Do not cry for me.
i know you dont care
Dont remind me of "happy memories"
between them are memories full of abuse
Do not pray for me
believe me, i will be much better when im away
Do not offer to help
i wont need you anymore
Dont shake my hand
you've crushed it enough
When i turn 18
let me go, and dont talk to me
Because
You brought this upon yourselves.
You wont see your grandchildren
You wont know my job
You wont attend my parties
You wont hear from me at all.
You pushed everything away from me
So when i turn 18, its time that i let go of you and start a new, better life

Every time I swallow one of your excuses I lose a piece of myself.
If you don’t want to go out with me, tell me don’t give me an excuse.
Every time you go out with another girl, I confront you.
You say I’m not good enough and that you need a girl who cares.
I care, I care about you even when you hit me and told me I was a *****.
I won’t leave and you know that.
You make me feel like I can’t live without you.
Your right I can't live without you, I can't buy clothes or make my own choice of what I want to eat without asking you.

Maybe because I've always been
*******--
Or unscrewed, I suppose--
In the mental department
Maybe because I know he's a friend
He's just as scared of the world as me
He's not some evil figure
Lurking about at night
Intentionally trying to terrify
He's a man all the same
I don't care what his appearance is
He just tries to hide
Seeking refuge and comfort
Trying to hide his lugubrious mind
He just wants a friend that understands
So he lays under the bed
Or sits in the closet
He doesn't even say a thing
Except "Boo-hoo"
When he hears your life story spoken aloud
By your conscious lips
Or subconscious dream clouds
But what most people don't hear
Is the important half
"Hoo"
They hear boo
And awake and scream
Trying to climb into bed with parents
But Mr. Boogeyman hasn't visited
In a long while
And I'm starting to miss him
Maybe he'll come back tonight
But I'm not afraid of the Boogeyman
Because I've met much worse

I just want to know
That it's right by that
Feeling in my stomach
And I want it to be magical
Not stereotypically per se
But magical for me
And for her or for him
Because love is love
No matters what's in the pants
I want a love story
Not right now
But soon
I have always dreamed
Of having a high school sweetheart
And it could've been possible
If he wasn't abusive
If I noticed what she was trying to say
Or if he wasn't two-timing
I wonder if she knows
I digress
I want romantic
Like every girl deep down
I just want real love
But I want flings now

If I write about how much heartache and depression I'm facing
I'll never get noticed
anywhere

simply because in order to catch someone's eye
you have to write about what's
real

and apparently, all the hurt I experience on a daily basis
is simply a figment of my
imagination

Im sorry.
I couldnt do it.
See the thing is
Pressure builds up.
Fear takes hold
And i am left a victim.
I wish i didnt have to change for you.
When you told me you loved me
Was it true
or was it because you felt you had to say it.
I love you.
But i cant change me
Not even for you
Because i would never ask you
To change
Love me
Just the way i am
Or leave me