I know I told you that I just
Wanted to be friends
But..
I want to be more than that
I want you to think of me
Like I think of you at 4 am
Smile at a simple one worded text
That makes the day go by so much better
I want you to look at me
The way you look at her
Noticing the little things I do
That I don't even notice about myself
But mostly I want you to love me
Like I love you and you love her
Look at me and smile
Kissing me at random times
I want to say I love you
And not hide in your shadow
Because I do love you
I just wanted you to know
e.j.

Lie after lie. It ended so soon.
It was just me, and the boy I never truly knew.
Day after day time wasted thinking about you, you are the boy I never even knew.
Month after month I still think about you, even after everything you put me through.
This should be the end, everyone knew, besides the girl in the corner looking at you.
Now I know you are the boy I never, even knew.
H.K

I wish i was not so dark,
Not The skin but in my heart,
Its always a midnight hue,
And in my heart there is a part that waits,
I wait for you.

Had to stop. The color outside
Drew me.
The air smelled like a lake's.
And I begged for the water again.
That's gotta be the next step.
Find water. Float under it.
I gotta see it. And smell it.
The dying light of rain.
It makes me feel like
Dust floating.
A million different pieces.
Thinking for themselves.
Held together. Happy like that.
The dew makes me see lines,
in the grass blades.
Follow us.
I wrote about those connections
In my little pocketbook.
There were flowers.
Thrashed in the wind.
Didn't care.
Wanted to.
Maybe I can. Floating.
Looking at the water.
Maybe paradise is at the shore.
Atlantis. Happy. Under water. By water.
I can see it.
Lawn chair. This book. Me.
Smiling or too happy to move my face.
Just laying there. Sun. Orange with the evening.
Sunglasses. My grandpa's.
He can see it. I can see it.
Found it.
Paradise.
Fresh water. I'll fish in it.
I can run down and swim.
For. Or float.
Not feel nasty when I walk out.
Let the sun bake the water away.
While I figure myself out. In here.
Paradise. I'll go.

Our relationship never seems to work out
It goes so well, that it's almost perfect
Then falls apart like dry sand
I'm always thinking of you
Even if I don't want to
It's like you're always in my mind
But feels as if I'm not in yours
And something wants us together
But something else wants us apart
I don't know what to be more afraid of
Having you always there
My heart in your hands
Or not having you at all
Crying myself to sleep cause I don't have you by my side
All I know is I might fall so hard
That it could be something strange
And really scary
Called love
But the thing is I don't believe in love
Maybe you could change that
e.j.

You're mysterious
With black hair
And dark eyes
No care in the world
A skater guy
Beautiful smile
From the warm state
Shorts and sand
Wet hair and vans
Stay up all night
Till daylight
I want to get to know you
But you're kind of quite
But look over at me
As you want to say something
I'm waiting for the day
You come over
Introducing yourself
Probably won't happen
You think you're to cool
To even say hi
Guess it's for the best
Cause I have a feeling
I would fall
So easily for you
And you wouldn't
Catch me
Letting me hit face first
On the cold ground
e.j.

I miss you
I miss you
I miss you

I miss your smile
and the way your lips would say my name

I miss how you'd just stare at me
and kiss me at random times

I miss the four am calls
and how you'd sing to me even though it was off key

I miss the early morning walks
and late night talks

But mostly..

I miss us
Oh how I miss us
e.j.