If I can't find you in this lifetime,
I'll find you in another.
I'll wait for you forever,
you'll always be my lover.

My arms pull her close to my chest
so that she can lay her head above my heart
and listen to it beat like a ticking clock
where she can keep time and remember she’s alive.
Together we watch the headlights of cars
line shadowed walls in the silence
that is only broken by our synchronized breaths.
I watch her eyelids fall like dying stars,
with much more grace it takes my breath away,
a vision not everyone is blessed to see,
the moonlight’s glow on her dark hair has hypnotized me.
How could I ever long to sleep?

It's on the tip of my tongue,
a chilling breeze whipping my face
that lets me feel every ounce of blood in my veins.
It's the feeling that I could jump and fall through
the air when really I'd just hit the ground
that my feet never found the courage to leave.
It's the place hidden beneath the darkest part of
my very soul that, when touched, makes me
feel alive, no bleeding necessary,
just breathing in, breathing out.
It's standing on a broken sidewalk in the
middle of a grey city, people rushing  by,
and my body is stationary, my legs
molded to cement like weeds pushing
through the cracks because when you
think about it we are not just breathing in
the air, we are breathing in the sky,
constellations filling my lungs, I throw
my head back and laugh them out
again with joy.  I'll take your hand and
you'll take mine.  Together we'll walk
toward the sun until we make it to the
end of the earth and grow ignorant
to the passing of time.

Part One
Cold wind rushes in beneath the cracked
window that was never fixed after you threw
that rock through it in a fit of anger when you
were drafted to the war in your mind,
the one that leaves us silent for days because
your pride keeps your jaw shut tight though
we surge with energy from the tension of our
love that dances around us and teases us with
the knowledge that one day we will come around.
I leave the broken window open now so when
you return again I’ll hear the pebbles
crunching beneath your feet as you make your
way up to the door, fumbling through your
pockets looking for the keys.  You won’t need
them, you know, because I’ll meet you at the
door before you even try to open it.
I have a cold from the draft coming in through
the window.  You’ve returned from the war
but I know it’s never over.  You’ll stay here
with me until you’re drafted again.  I’ll
savor each moment with you until then.

Part Two
I bury my face in your collar bone and I hide
my tears with the sniffling cold.  I have missed
you, I always miss you.  These days I have
with you are too precious to take for granted
I know my time is limited, you always leave,
duty calls, I can’t make you stay, I gave up
trying.  You go to war, you come back again,
you come back for me but there’s always
the draft.  The one through the window, the
one for the war, the constant reminder our
minds can’t ignore.  You come back for me
you always do just like I’m always fighting
for you.  One day the war will be over and
we’ll both see the sunlight from behind the
smoke and together we can close the window.

One look and her
******* eye pierces
me straight through the heart
in one blow the blood
rushes through me
I feel my knees giving
in and I fall
to the ground
I kiss the ground
she walked on
I breathe the air
she breathed
but that's as much of her
as i'll ever receive.
She will never be mine.
Not completely.

The emptiness I feel with her
carves a hollowness within my soul
so large is the cave between my ribs
her numbing cries create echoes.

Hands tied to hers though nothing's left
we try so hard to forever forget about
the loneliness that hangs heavy between us
the memories we've failed, the love we doubt.

We collapse and cry holding one another
but we refuse to let our passion go
our misery feeding off of each other
our poisonous love is drowning us slow.

Though in my life she
ceases to exist, my heart
beats for only hers.