You asked
What is the scariest part?

I answer
The scariest part
is not the feeling of loneliness
or the darkness that fills you
despite the looming pain
of emptiness

The scariest part
is the realization  
that you have lost yourself
completely
sinking in as you lay awake
at 2 AM
because you lost the ability to sleep
and you can't even cry
because you don't even care

If I was to tell you
There was a way to love
That was right
I would be wrong

But I've been wrong
A lot

Sometimes you're wrong
And that doesn't make you wrong
But with love
We're only wrong
Until we're right

Which is most of the time

I don't know what I'm doing
And I don't expect someone
To put up with my *******
My pain or hurt
I am not that unique
And none of us are

Our pain is the only thing
That makes us universal
Yet we argue
And debate whose is greater

We are only human
And once adults, broken
Never lose your empathy
Or your own heart

But never,
I, repeat, never
Give someone's happiness
More value than your own
Besides your children

Tomorrow, is a day
With, or without sunshine
You can smile or not
But, I promise
That, is a choice

beg
beneath the shoulder blades

if this touch is nothing more than
lonely synapse
and dopamine

rushing to embrace kin

or run your hand through her hair
as if your fingertips are magnets,
and all her thoughts follow along

if such a small thing

in the midst of celestial bodies
each on their slow decline
interfering, colliding in shadow

would turn us all into a lie

it is a good one

and I will tell it

when you call me by my name

it’s a warm cup of coffee on a cold morning
the scent wafting room to room
the sleep in my eyes just falls away
and although I can’t see you
I can hear the smile on your lips
and I can feel the warmth in your chest

when you call me by my name