The taste of adrenaline sits on my tongue
Copper in flavor, or maybe zinc, or steel
I do not know
So many metals have I tasted
This taste burns
Sending jolts of electricity through my body
This taste of adrenaline only comes
When I think of you
Along with the butterflies
How they wreck my stomach
Wreaking havoc within
Causing the taste to become bolder
Unable to rid it with simple drink
The only cure for such a taste
The balm of your lips
The touch of your skin
I need it now more than ever
To push aside this metallic taste
*adrenaline

I'm one of very few people I know
Who enjoys a rainy day
But my least favorite night
Is one where I can't see the stars

And these clouds
They cover over everything

I wouldn't even be able to tell you the moon is new

I want to fall in love
With a rainy day woman

Amongst the sapphire roses
The stems dance along the dust
That spreads on winds of you

Morning came like the past
Beating down a mountain valley
Conjuring up a lovers rally
Could we dally upon subtle dreams?
A kiss planted inside the skin
No makeup could change its view
A façade I bid adue

A world where you are you

And I
Loving the plum blossoms
That formed upon your skin
Nature causing beauty to be natural
Not transformed into potions
Built by peoples emotions
For we learned to love the river
A purest source of freedom
That drifts along your rivers roots
That I bloomed to love

You became nature
And I learned how to photograph with my eyes

I'm drunk!!!!
I can hardly walk straight
I'm glad I don't need to talk
Because I hate slurring my words

they're too important
To be mumbled
And misunderstood

I'm drunk
And I love it
I hate it

Still I don't want to talk
But I cannot help but write
It is the spirit within me
That screams I need to be heard

And when I'm drunk
I understand
The spirit knows more than I do
It knows why I feel so much hope when the moon is new

And such loss
When the moon is full

I'm drunk
But I'm a conduit to other realms
And only by spreading this message around
Can you hear it

I'm drunk
(Hahaahaahahahaahahahaha)
But I still hope
What inspires me
Will inspire you

You are the rose with fake petals
You are the diamonds worth less than lipsticks

You are the Converse with untied laces
You are the Svedka mixed with tears

You are the jacket that was thrifted,
You are the star with a light switch

You are the angel with foam wings,
You are the unseen thorn in the garden

You are the cigarette smoke that drifts
You are the needles in the dear sewing kit

You are the duchess of comfortable silence
You are the countess of disclusion

You are the sweetest pill in the box,
but the most bitter drink in the afternoon

i feel like i owe you a love letter
(or at least an apology):
my love
letters have always been born
of spark, burning bits of bark
or grass, ash -- elements consumed by morning
fed to wind
departed

i do not love
you flash and fade
surge then break

you are underneath all the soil
you are warm and solid and everything
we move together everywhere, slow
but always together moving:
until the heart goes ice we are
together moving, and even in silence
in darkness we will be together
unmoving

i do not love you thunder
i love you stream:
sometimes roar but often murmur
heard but hidden somewhere among the oaks and maples
not tucson wash that flows twice a year
but new york stream that ices over,
floods springtime, bows deep into late summer,
always cuts
steady etch deeper every day until we are
grand canyon love,
see it from space love,
lasts like mountains love

i wish
i could write
these words
smaller,
origami them
through your pores
dissolve them into
your blood

feels
too true
to be
louder
than whisper

I wonder, when John Hancock
signed the Declaration,
if he could feel time pulling apart
then back together,
taking the shape
of his America.

I wonder, when Lincoln
felt the cold bullet
enter the curls of his hair,
if he had enjoyed the play.

I wonder, when ****’s
burned ownerless toys
and 80-year marriage rings,
if they were shaken
by the screams of thousands.

I wonder, when the sailor
kissed that nurse
when the war had been won,
if he thought about bombs
or her soft lips.

there’s something addicting about hot showers.
worse than nicotine
there is no surgeon general warning
or a legal age to enjoy a steamy waterfall.
be cautious in your endeavors,
however,
because just like a pack of cigarettes,
they offer guise in smoke.
they can drown you
in your own sadness
or you can throw out your lighter.

It’s Valentine’s Day.
Daddy makes coffee in two cups heart-shaped cups.
Mommy is in bed, sleeping in.
Daddy waits for Mom to wake up- she doesn’t
but she’s still breathing.
Daddy sighs and goes to work.
Mommy shakes my sister and me awake
and pulls us into boots and coats and gloves.
We tiptoe over shards of glass on the way out.

Mommy drives too fast.
She makes me watch when the light is green for go
at long intersections because she keeps getting something in her eye.
We get to the airport.
Mommy dashes inside like a guilty person in a movie
but I know she’s innocent because she’s my mom.
I sit and watch planes disappear into bundles of clouds that look like white cotton-candy
and planes land pulling their wheels into their chest with a fast whoosh.

Mommy comes back empty-handed.
One long sigh passes her lips
before she starts the car.
My sister asks where are we going.
Mommy only gets a short sound out but I know she means home.
“Good,” my sister says. “I’m tired.”
“Me too,” Mommy replies.

I will always be
And even the stars I am made from
Have become black holes
Fuming with all the light they have devoured
I will always be
And my devolution to a lower species
A primal instinctual beast
That pities passion and hates what's beautiful
I will always be
A hurricane that never meets the land
A bitter force of nature
Who dies alone in some northern sea
I will always be
A bubbling stewing volcano
A ticking time bomb
Just waiting for the right time that never comes
I will always be
Beat down

Because I want to be strong I am weak
Those fickle petty rules by which we live
            Have made me sick
I'm not immune to having dreams and desires
When every better part of me
            Has been seduced
By the velveteen swans that flash as images in my mind
And on the plasma screens for which I bleed

And really I have grown
Grown sick and tired and exhausted
From breathing the air I need to live
The toxic vile air
Causing cancer
From drinking from the well
Which has been poisoned

I like my poison undiluted

I like my poison clearly marked
By sinister skulls and crossbones
          With the worst of intentions
I would actually enjoy the knowledge
That this poison in my blood
           Is going to reach my once enamored heart
Which used to beat with the hope for tommorow
And now is a rhythmic device in a song full of sorrow

And really I have died
Dangerous oderous chemical sand timers
I've died a thousand insecure lives
In a false world
With fake meaning
And my arteries and veins will attest
This disease is a foe that never rests

I like my poison undiluted