It waits and baits us
with fear and pain
spraining our already
sore souls
and struggling brains.

The dark eclipse
that does not miss
this foolish *******.

Where more time
is spent in
then we had existing.

It leaves us hollow,
a brand that burns
our throats with sorrow
cause that brass fact
is hard to swallow.

It does not give
a single whiff
if we try to deny it,
and there is no way
to bribe it.

It cares not for
the quality of our character
that maybe
reflected in
our charity
directed towards
our human kin.

But without life
it cannot exist,
this deeply distasteful
state of nothingness.

Forever isn't really long,
We call it Love in a two minute song.
I've witnessed it in my cat's jaws,
Saw a dove impaled on eagle's claws.
It's a moment in grasslands and water,
A flash of colour, then the slaughter.
It's a nanosecond at conception,
It's a blitzgried in insurrection.
It has no width, length or depth,
It continues the second of our last breath.

We are
putrid flesh stained with
crimson pools that fall
as we drain it all.

We are fate’s fallen foe,
fragile beings
finally seen
as sparkling truths
that become
angelic paintings.

We are floating feathers
that mingle with
soft pink petals,
forming a new nest
were we can burn
and be reborn
from our old ashes.

If any stranger asks us,
we are walking frames
of fractured madness
little glass figurines
that fall between
the cracks that we have
never ever even seen
and cut other
soft bleeding things.

It's hot, stormy nights like this
With tip-taps on the glass and
Sudden loud claps rumbling
Thoughts of my past come
Scrambling back

That summer night party where
Our eyes struck a match and
We danced in the smoke while
We sweat out the high and
I couldn't stop my mind from wondering between your thighs
Whiskey burned holes in my memory
But not as big as the one I tore in your leggings...

But we burned out that night
I didn't know, I just hoped you
Might have wanted to stay but
There was someone else and you
Told me that you made a mistake...

You were art to me...
Just the way you walked through life
And talked with a lisp and didn't
Take anyone's ****, what a bad ***
Punk rocker *****, I swear to GOD
If I would've known you were
Sticking needles in your arm...

I doubt I could've taken it away
Addiction is something that stays
Even when it's unwelcome, and
There's nothing I can do to change the past, but it's nights like this one that
I just wish I could tell you
That you were art to me.

Despair is fear
that no one cares
and that
your life
won't be a mad cap comedy
or happy ending tv series,
but just an endless state of
existing unloved.

It is a pillowcase
wetted with
saltwater
and snot
to top
it off.

It is breaths
that cannot be
caught
as sobs steal
the air you wish
to fill your
lungs with.

It is the anxiety
and voices that
say you will hurt
the ones you love
and the only action
that is good enough
to protect them
is you dying.

It is a certain suffering blindness
where a pleasant future
does not exist
and only pain persists
in all future events.

I missed this,
magic instance
that happened
when I finally noticed
my heart was breaking
in tiny increments.

Tears tare
at time’s restraints,
making moments
of minor pain
seam epic
whilst
major sorrows
become speckles
in the distance.

I am disconnected,
disturbed
by this disjointed
society
that does not share
the same values
as me.

Humanity could be
lovers of poetry
and science
but instead
it chooses
greed and violence.

I am lonely,
left longing
for a companion
but unwilling to venture forth
into the storm
because life has informed me
that despite reports to contrary
I really don’t matter.