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Adaley June
sleep evades me
in a bed of lies
who is this man
I lay beside

his face haunting
his body relentless
this mattress crawls
with unfinished business

I’m a ghost in his sheets
somewhere between
dusk and dawn
where lovers meet

but he
doesn't love me
I'm just another
He saw the parade of pain,
rough edges worn down
as he moved across town.

The mirror of boy not yet a man,
transitioning between
not understanding anything
and finally learning
that there is a universe full of
thing that he might love,
but will never learn enough
to fully understand.

Neck perpetually bent,
eyes always lowering,
partly from walking
and reading
at the same time,
and being worn down
by the bullies all around,
especially the tyrant at home.

Self-esteem was a strange fantasy,
and anger became
his self-inflicted pain,
but books and tv shows
were a nice way to let go
if just for a short bit.

Racing thoughts that kept him awake,
unless he played a cd to keep those
thoughts quietly tucked away.

Twenty years later with knowledge well earned,
the world still turns, but now it burns.
The boy is a man, so to speak,
and with everything he has read, and listen to,
to help adjust his world view
with the constantly changing times,
he still hasn’t mastered enough to explain
what makes people hurt
and how to ease the world’s ever-expanding pain.
It’s hard to breath
but easy to bleed
with this hole
in her breast,
a gaping wound
in her chest.

She tries to keep
the weeping
to not let her
see her depressed,
but it is beyond

One body missing
from the chair,
and child’s bed.
She still feels
a quiet dread.

No sleep,
but a little drink
to fill the void;
They say
time will take
the pain away,
but another loss
is what she is
trying to avoid.

She goes on,
while her family
tries to bear
the same agony
with stoic despair.
There is only
air and tension
to fill their

No shared connection
or conversation
to help them all
deal with this.

So, day by day
the nothingness
burrows deeper
and eats away.

The space between,
human beings
expands beyond

keep expecting them
to come back together again,
but the crack between
these human beings
becomes too far to leap.
Till, one day they are
too far gone from each other
to even speak.

The reaper’s victory
is totally complete,
because for one,
he got four souls to keep.
As I say goodnight
to my former life,
let go of those
previous blinking lights
that once defined
my divine
yester self.

I fall asleep
and all that was me
is washed about,
swirled around,
and restored.

I awake refreshed,
form regenerated,
mind invigorated,
and ready for me,
the essence of my being
to be reintegrated.

Almost new,
similar to
but not exactly
the same,
as my previous
 Jan 2
Tension pinching
my chest
while I am clenching
my teeth
trying to catch
my bad breath.

Red eyes strained,
and pained
from coughing so hard
that my neck veins
bulges out so far.

So, tired
but I can’t sleep,
haven’t eaten
much all week
and I am feeling
really weak.

and afraid
so many things
I have yet to say.
If I die today
who will know
or care anyways?

I’m scared
and confused.
After all
that I have done,
this is how I lose.

No one here
to talk to me
and I don’t
want to believe
this might be
how I leave
the world.

Is there anyone there?
 Jan 1
One withering look
and I am an unbound book,
pages fluttering away, broken,
smitten with tiny kisses,
or temporary ink tokens.

She can reignite a dying sun,
set solarized skies ablaze
and make them burn
for days and days.

She can shift the seas,
then trade places with
strange faces that
echo older generations
which will never come back.

Five fingers folding in
touching my mind,
burying brilliance in my skin,
she is the door to
Oz, Wonderland,
and Neverland,
making me wonder if I can
fly like superman.

She supersedes the entirety of my being,
enveloping, in all shades of dreams,
making my reality her plaything.

Not a person, more like a metaphor,
or a hint of a thought I’m searching for.
There’s eternity and an ocean’s more
waiting for this dreamer outside her door.
 Dec 2020
She promised revolutions
with the slow movement
of her dancing form;

Of new evolutionary
that may be scary
to the new environment
we would exist in.

Artisan of living,
lips giving
sweet passion’s nectar,
she was a specter
of life and death’s
imaginary perfectness.

A thousand point of
poetic reactions to love,
more than enough
to dream eternity
written within
the cold skin
of infinity.

She promised me
a grand reality,
and I wept,
so ready to succumb.
Then she left
and I was struck numb
and dumb.

Now, I wonder
who taught her
how to lie so
 Dec 2020
“I hate to be this way,”
mother nature says.
“I gave you a chance
to be the steward
of the animals and plants,
on this little blue planet,
but you made other plans.

You prioritized greed
and made impossible demands
on the resources
you claimed to command
in this beautiful land.

There were signs,
obvious trends
to portend
a horrible end
to all men,
but you wouldn’t listen.

Even the children
you claimed to cherish
jumped on this important
climate issue.

So, despite several generations
of obvious observations,
about natural education,
and the best efforts
of kindhearted
people who have started
social movements,

at this particular moment
mother nature declares
that you are not important
and should proceed to locate
another biosphere to occupy
because while you have been
grabbing and destroying
evolution has decided
you’re no longer invited
to stay on this planet.”
 Dec 2020
With our attitudes
towards IQ
and academic aptitudes
our human metrics
makes us
and unjust.

is a modern
mass pathology,
by outdated

So, what gives rise
to precise
intense inner
creative drives
that elevate
and surprise
humans before
great creations
are fully realized?

The core of
is not centralized,
but synthesized
from your insights.
It is up to
you to decide,
bring out your
unique light
and brighten
our lives.
 Dec 2020
Half asleep the creep
takes a back seat.

Eyes ahead I drive instead
of acknowledging anything,
but something is nagging,
some question is blinking,
like a bright red turn signal.

He sits silent, but present
all stillness in my presence,
while the sound of rain
pelts this metal carriage.

No words, but I know
where I am supposed to go.
No time but I still stall,
try not to move at all,
cause I am not ready
for what waits at
the end of the road.

The engine hums some
endless tune,
rattling on like a sad song,
with skies that are so clouded
that I can’t see the heavenly crescent
that should be right above me.

I panic, crying and frantic
tell my passenger that “it’s too soon.
Give me till next June,
cause there is so much
I still want see and do.”

He leans in, breathing
and I can’t believe
what I am seeing
in my rearview mirror.
Eyes like mine,
lips that match,
same hair of black.

He says in a voice
I am sure is mine,
“don’t look back.
You’re driving to **** fast.”

The rain subsides.
The night finds beautiful moonlight
and I drive.

I turn on the radio,
let my stress go,
and move with the
Billy Joel flow.

Somehow, I can tell
my passenger is grooving as well.

In the distance I can see
carousal like lights
swirling in front of me,
glorious shades and hues
of reds, greens, and blues.

The highway is slick,
and for a millisecond I can feel
my tires lose their grip.
I let the pedal up and turn the wheel
into the spin before it begins
and keep on driving.

Memories follow.
My friend is still riding.
Night turns to dawn
and I keep on driving.

Towns come and I go out.
I see a lot and learn to doubt,
questioning what this questing
is all about.

Not a word from the dude in the back,
and I am okay with that.
The road never ends
and I don’t remember
where this journey began.

I am just driving on man,
just driving on.
 Dec 2020
I hang on to
childish memories and dreams,
but they don’t seem
to want to hold on to me.

I lost the leaf laden road
with the overhanging oaks,
soft swaying leaves,
and blinding sunlight
that flickered as we
drove underneath.

I’ve misplaced the place
where I would sit and read
with my bare feet
dangling out in front of me.

I cannot locate the field
where we picked strawberries,
or the local grocery store
that has been closed for more
than ten years.

The old wooden swing
that hung from the branch
of a sturdy front yard tree,
the one with a fraying rope
that I would further fray
when I twisted myself up
and spun back and away.

The little baby boy,
with his soft little head,
tiny fast chubby legs
and pink teddy bear
has managed to grow up
and no longer lives here.

The space faring
cape wearing
wonder kid
who dreamed of doing
such amazing ****,
no longer exists.

I miss all of it.
 Dec 2020
I’d like to be celebrated,
for what I wrote,
what I stated,
how I used words
to debate hate
and help others
change places
with alien faces
so, they could feel
just a fraction of
the pain they instill
in those they should love.

I’d like people to recall
how I helped others,
a hand for those who fell
kind words to wish
those dealing with grief well,
an ear for people in pain,
and a joke to spring them
back up again bringing in
the remnant of past smiles.

I just want to be remembered;
Don’t you?
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