I know you're hurting, sweetie, and it's breaking my heart. I keep seeing all these horrible things in my sleep and it's scaring me.
I want to tell you so much, but I'm afraid I'll hurt you again - and I cannot do that.

I wanted to **** myself, and I don't know how I'll tell anyone that, let alone my best friend. I prayed for the end; I knew how I was going to do it: and then an angel showed up.

There are moments when it feels like it's better, but sometimes, they hurt the most, because they are so fleeting.
I don't know if it'll ever get better, darling, but sleep tight, you hear?
Sleep...

Don't you go worrying about me, I'll be fine. It's probably just a phase. I'll be fine in a few weeks, or a month, or a year.
Chin up, darling, you're doing great.

i am not a person of many things
i have only a small family
one brother
i spend my days
using the same few things
over and over
i haven't many followers on social media
or in real life
my grades are fine
though i have not as many points as you

but i have sung thousands of lines, verses
i have birthed hundreds of poems and stories
some not written down
but they have still existed in my mind
and in that space between
spoken and unspoken
the pen
drips gold into my soul
whether real or metaphorical


i am wealthy in my ways

This is only one day out of so many more to come. This set back does not define you, it’s only a folded back tab in a book, that you will look back to every once in a while when you yearn for clarity.

Live for the promise of an uncertain outcome. Stop worrying yourself to the point of fatigue about what you think your future needs to have to make how you lived your life seem successful. 

Breathe
Live for the promise of one day being able to unabashedly love with the force of a tsunami. So many people will pass in and out of your life, let them go when it is time. Learn from the lessons they brought to your attention. Look back fondly on the times you spent with them, not bitterly. let them move on to their next stage while you move on to yours.
You have so many years to live, call them up in 10 years and see if they found what they were searching for.

Breathe
Stop waiting by the phone for a response. Be what you make yourself out to be, No more excuses. Be gentle, trustworthy and patient.
Breathe
This will pass.

The boy went by Samuel and the girl by Beth
He planned for his future while she awaited her death
Never a likely couple, they put romance to the test
She had cuts on her wrists and a void in her heart
Still, he thought she was gods finest work of art
There were years of love, of picnics and fun
Never would you guess their romance would be done
But he thought he could fix her, rid her of her vice
When he couldn't, he felt his love couldn't suffice
Beth's cuts were deep and Sam's patience, thin,
One more slice and his temper would give in,
She tried to stop but still resisted the change,
She found his love exceedingly strange
It couldn't be taken, and alas she cut
He began stammering in rage, screaming, "WHAT"
He ran to the shed, knowing what he'd find there
And hoisted the axe, high into the air
Sam ran her down and looked her in the eye
And brought the axe down, screaming,
"If you want to die, die"

Life is full of sad stories
And painful memories
It's also filled with laughter
And beautiful people to share the moments you adore most with
But its a dark world out there with thunderstorms that dont stop
And disasters that never cease
However, there are rays of light
That i call hope,
You have to hold onto that hope,
That it will all get better
Or you will have nothing at all,
You'll just stare blankly at things watching, waiting for a change.
*But you are the change.
You are the hope.