Tethered to an illusion
He'd rather sink than swim
Abandon all six senses
Rather than feel desolation again

Tis' no crime to trace one's edges
But falling off is a different matter
Shame is a seaworthy vessel
Sailing on oceans of greed and clatter

He rappels from throne on high
Storms heed no man's command
An avalanche of fears behind him
Ahead, a bleak and lifeless wasteland

But seams don't tear unless they fray
Utopia costs more than infinite gold
Ambition built this city of avaritia
But he watches it crumble beneath the soul he sold

If I repaid you in kind
It wouldn't be so kind
For I am astray and unable to find
The grace for which I need to forgive and forget

If I repaid you in kind
It wouldn't be so kind
Silent misery drenched and undefined
Vengeance fills my lungs faster than oxygen

If I repaid you in kind
It wouldn't be so kind
For I am simply the blind following the blind
Tripping over skeletons and shackles in this pitch black

If I repaid you in kind
It wouldn't be so kind
Drop another coin in the wishing well
Always a devil at the bottom waiting for his due

Motionless and stationary
Yesterday haunts the steps of my boots
Over you, or just halfway under you?
Watching daybreak with one eye open
Nearing the point where splinters break

Weather is calm, but I'm a soul of storms
Out of the frying pan, out of reasons why
Rational?  No, but I never claimed to be
Seven hours in this abyss of apathy
Traitor!  Keep your distance and your sympathy

Each their own, but I've disowned myself
Nursing bitterness to spark another war
Everyday is just a spectre of deceit
My reflection stares right back at me
You, my friend, have become my own worst enemy

It's obvious when she jumps, she misses
Leaving behind a footprint that tries too hard
To tell a happy story

She loses her confidence, and in turn, loses me
Because running is so much simpler
Than running in place

She scrawls all her feelings with invisible ink
And stores all the dreams she's saved
In a false bottom box

Beyond the layers and beyond the mask
There's a shimmer of something more
Something, I once adored

In the corner of her mind, I drift
Floating like detritus along the open sea
And waiting for an outstretched hand

Sandpaper sharpens the arrow
My mind grows duller with each new moon
I feel vindicated
But is that meant to change my destiny?

I hum carefully crafted melodies
While dodging the traffic of unending static
I love unconditionally
But does that mean I am loved the same?

Lavender wine enthralls scavengers
They forage for another bridge to burn
I watch it blacken and dissipate
But does apathy mean I no longer care?

My arrow is now sharper
Voices whisper, "weakling, loose the final blow"
A single tear slips from my eye
But is one arrow supposed to end this hell?

If I took a walk around
In your unconscious, what would I find?
Would I see myself bouncing around
Like a pinball
Or soaring through the air
Like a phoenix rising?

Would I collide with your dreams
And be annihilated?
Would I see you naked
And cowering in your shame?
Or clothed in all your splendor
Like the day our eyes first met

If I took a walk around
In your unconscious, would I see how to love you?
Would I witness your favorite movie?
And be splashed by your favorite colors
Would I see the pain that you stowaway
Or the smiles you've yet to discover?

Would I want to run from your demons
Or take up sword and shield?
Would I see the same man you see
Everytime you look at me?
Or would I stare at myself, thoughtfully, and wonder
Who is this person I pretend to be?

Happiness is not a highway
It's a green exit sign
Failure is not a collision
It's just the yellow lines

Upon releasing my grasp on my childhood fears
I turn them over to the quartermaster
A burly fellow exhibiting a sneer with no rival
And as I watch, he packs them tightly in duplicity's pouch

The walk back down these stairs made of rotting ash
Is now much more precarious than I remember
For time is traveling at such dizzying speeds
That my balance has become flimsy in its disrepair

Despite the rapping of nightmare's hands at my door
I saunter over in stupor to let unwelcome guests inside
Unleashed, they frantically invade every crevice
Leaving just fractions of those who once roamed these dusty halls

There is now but a dim candle on the cupboard
Its remaining light grows meeker by the day
I gather all that glimmers to my eye, as dull as they may shine
And set foot for the only world within my reach

Outstretched hands
I'm governed by a cycle of choices
Wash.
Rinse.
Repeat.

Dirt under my fingernails
I listen to a thousand voices
Wash.
Rinse.
Repeat.

Gripping a shovel
I break earth and hit layers of shale
Break.
Stop.
Withdraw.

Eight barren harvests
Yielding no fruits, just broken, rusted locks
Break.
Stop.
Withdraw.

I suppose by now my disposition is bitter
The gravitas courses these bloodless veins
Write.
Speak.
Destroy.

I collect no glee from your failure
Nor scintillating coins that rattle like chains around feet.
I just write.
Speak.
Destroy.

Tell us your witty tales, bard
Don't leave us whimpering and suffering
On the other side of this pale, pitiful, world
Tell us anything to ward off the demons
Tell us something to make the ale taste better
As we swim where dreams and nightmares clash

Drench our sorrows with your songs, bard
Send all the soldiers and waifs home tonight
With wrinkled smiles on forlorn faces
Strum your chords as we gambol about
Hit your notes as we hit each other
And laugh spitefully at fate's cruel jokes

In Edinburgh,
Where all her colors were born
Where blues grazed her eyes
And every lavender was torn

In Edinburgh,
Where lips of violet were pursed
Where the greys all surrendered
And the Lothians touched her first

In Edinburgh,
Where cobblestone formed her feet
Where her kiss swept through meadows
With windswept hair like golden wheat

In Edinburgh,
Where her roots took hold in the moors
Where her innocence first trembled
And nimble toes danced along shores

In Edinburgh,
Where her sins became my daydream
Where a tomorrow may never come
And her love only flows downstream

One second glance
Into the looking glass
And I am swept away into a fantasy
Whisked by gales I try not to withstand

Radiant, brilliant, like a summer's eve
You cast a spectrum of light into my soul
Fragrant, ravishing, like flora from Atlantis
You tug and pull at every tout string

I am obliterated with beauty
And awash with such fair grace
Destroyed by the sweetness of your lips
Made whole again by a touch of your hand

If I open my lips I may be speechless
But you walk the ground within my mind
Read me quickly before I wither away
And my song will echo the great divide

I bite down on a sliver of silver
That connects your lip to outer space
I cleanse the stars of all diseases
But find my heart cannot keep pace

I bite down on a sliver of turquoise
A talisman fit for an everyman king
But like the rings around Saturn
Escape velocity is hindered upon your string
                                                          ­                     
Poach me of my skin
And coat me instead with rust
I awake to a lute playing out of tune
Causing my dormant senses to all combust

Teach me to be a vulture
To sink my talons far beyond the surface
So many sharp facets, so many blunt edges
And my one and only distorted purpose

Darting in and out of atmosphere
A slave to bloodstained convictions
You own all the lands between life and death
And all the roads between fact and fiction

Calloused hands.
They are a mother's fallacy.
She trades her beliefs, and the missing pages, for the acceptance of her counter-culture.

Bleeding families.
They are a father's destiny.
He devastates, and intimidates, his circle of trust from the inside out.

Off-key lullabies.
They are a daughter's inheritance.
She is born into subsistence, watching television instead of daydreams.

Frivolous fantasies.
They are a son's one-way ticket out.
He is carefully reckless, boldly reserved, and he will begin the cycle again.

Terrors in the night again
That slither like serpents in the sheets
I ward them off with manufactured lullabies

Cold sweat runs down my spine
Burning my flesh, yet chilling my soul
I clutch my pillow and dare to dream again

The visions have evolved again
From grey to colors as vivid as your eyes
And I am invested, beyond hope of repair

Under willows, the apathy weeps upon my face
Leaving my guardians paralyzed
And yielding all of the secrets within my bones

Pierced through, watching myself bleed out
I smile a broken, transparent, smile
And drift away, where angels dare not tread

She waltzes through his mind
While he trips over her melody
And eyes finally lay down their silent guns
He's a shameless drifter
A bedraggled amnesiac in disrepair
Yet he'll never forget the way she moves
The clouds burst of bronze as she rises
Rivers run of silver as she falls
But he remains a frozen epiphany
Her brilliant eyes like a morning star
Her lips flushed in crimson repose
As she sways her way into guarded memories
She waltzes through his mind
While he trips over her melody
And eyes finally lay down their silent guns

The memories come
The way a flood comes to a desert
But it's too late, I am parched again
Footsteps
Footsteps linger through forgotten halls
But as a father I'm just an echo within

Bitter is just a different sweet
And sweet is just a different bitter
Tread lightly, each step is more reckless than the last
Trespasser!
You trespass on ground not made for your two feet
So move thyself, and do not return til' storm has passed

I once spent uncertain days
Drowning inside the wishing well
Dry, and drier still the wishes would become
Terrible
Terrible, all the things that I would rip undone
I devoured the essence of all I loved for just a meager crumb

These cracks grow ever wider
Opening, never closing
They breach the road of dawn's suffering

The steam rises in a barren winter
Warmer, and warmer
A preamble to a year of desolation

The chair in the corner rocks in rhythm
Monotone, creaking and shadowing
A ritual of maleficence that lives ever on

The clouds billow in the morning
Hastening, to a new day
They fill empty souls with a devil's breath

The distance grows ever wider
Opening, never closing
Breaching the walls of a windswept hamlet

The garden cowers into the earth
Retreating, for the sounds of silence deafen
Weeping for a dream that was never born

I am a weary traveler, yet I fatigue from sitting still
I've been on this trail, seeking medicine for my disease
Not sure if I'm still alive, or merely ill

I am lukewarm water, yet I burn from the cold inside
I stop at every impasse, pushing rocks out of my way
And wondering if my legs are broken, or if they overstride

I am a rudderless vessel, paying no mind to signs
As I drift from place to place, from dream to dream
Retreating from this world without a finish line

I am a weary traveler, yet I fatigue from sitting still
I've been on this trail, seeking medicine for my disease
Still not sure if I'm alive, or merely ill

So I'm a fool
What does that entail?
Is it because I walk this endless road?
Faceless and alone
Never stopping to settle myself
In all the crevices of life

Or is it because I revel in the mystery?
Stealing stars from the sky
Lapping at dew that tastes like poison
As the sun beats me down
I am just a carnivore
With an empty stomach

I think I'll hatch a harebrained scheme
One to form and mold my self-worth
Is this wonderland all out of wonder?
Or after all this debating
Am I just a politician
With an empty stomach?

April emerges with little ambition
And it will fade as swiftly with similar intentions
So I am proud to be its fool
Careless and divided
Never aiming for the spoils
Just watching out for the watchers

Having fallen into trances before
I am no stranger to the spectacle
I am just a thimble
And you, my love
You are the needle

Together, we sew the regal robes of this affair
With silver heartstrings tout and bare
I am perched on electric fences
And it's true, my love
You are the current

Leaving steps behind heavy feet
These stitches are losing their strength
I am neither a bridge nor water
But I drown in blue, my love
You are the anchor

This loft reeks of expired sunlight
While eastbound clouds obstruct my view
I am no stranger to my senses
But it's no use, my love
You are the senselessness

It's raining acidic dreams and satellites
Sheathed in shadow, she tears her veil
My feet are cut from all the rubble
My throat is clutched, I can't inhale

Empress turns her keel
As she sails further and further away
She is feasting on simple solitude
Like a ravenous bird of prey

The aperture is closing
Soon, no light will pass
She stares through my empty soul
Sharp as starlight and broken glass

Twirling a dress sewn by comet tails
Fabric of penumbra and white lace
I trip into the low gravity of her love
Forever drifting through time and space

Tender helpless hands
Outstretched from the colossal abyss
That is love, loss, and lethargic lullabies

Digging deeper
The dirt is caking underneath my fingernails
Desperately clawing to find a God within his children

Yet finding nothing of the sort
Weary arms become numb and listless
Letting shadows consume the brief pale sunrise

Grappling with faith
Bleeding like horizons over porcelain eyes
Heaven, Hell, or am I straddling fences again?

Bravery before brevity  
Sanity has no sovereign, no direction, no pulse
And honor is a last breath escaping from dying lungs

Denouement.
Make me believe.
Believe I was more than a whisper.

Intermission.
Take a fading breath.
Breathe and release, the rift will close.

Prologue.
We are born.
Into tragedy and the sound of her smile.

Now we're back at where it always ends.
The beginning.

Wake me, o' sun
Bring life to these hollow limbs
I have dreamt only in serenity
To fill vacancies left by nefarious thoughts

Dismiss my trials
Ye holy judge of my lungs
Stagnancy chokes at my breath
As I gasp for my heart's appeal

Make haste, calloused heels
Carry me o'er these fruitless hills
Thirst conquers these feeble bones
As this feral enchantment dissipates

Noon will be o'erhead soon
The heat has grated me into pieces
Fast are thou demons in pursuit
Faster is the hardihood of my will

Thou shadows mount, o' moon
Traipsing to and fro along my path
Free shall I be once the lanterns are lit
Macerated but finally triumphant

I am, in ways, a disappointment to my father
Who never once failed to disappoint me
But, my heart was revived once I realized
That I am greater than the sum of disappointing parts

There's but a fortnight now
Until the shadows run off with what's left of me
You should know that there are only scant remains
Of the man you once knew

They say to just be still
And wait as a bystander to my own life
But waiting has never come easily to a man with thorns in his hands
So I fly instead, like a fool with his eyes closed

There's a moonlit ocean in the distance
A place to sink, or learn to swim
For a moment, the shadows have diminished from my sight
And her radiance erases the vile inside my heart

Cumbersome, this game of cat and mouse
You are a kind of wonder I know nil about
My audition is odd and barely audible
Drowning in tears of all my previous tragedies

Careful, you could hear a pin drop
As loud as sandbags falling upon the stage
Somewhere in the orchestra, a lonesome bow
Drags itself across cello strings tethered to my heart

The cherub with the harp is silent
But her echoes scale the room with glory undefined
Shameless, I am down to my final act
For the heart of the heroine, is an encore away

From the broken words
That spill across the pages in my head
To the paintings that adorn
The very walls of my heart
We still have time to rectify this calamity

From the rivulets that run
Throughout my depleted sandy soul
To the shadows that fall
Upon eyes that settle on the horizon
There rests hope on the eve of hopelessness

From the quicksand of mistakes
That have mired my steps for too long
To the whistles of locomotives
Across salty oceans of destiny
There I stand, changing colors like the sky

Chasms and carnivals
I am better left for dead
The fears buried within me
Are burying me instead
Anxiously apathetic
I am a sign nailed upon your door
Have you found a better story to tell
Than crashing recklessly into my core?

From a narrow perspective
Empires collapse
Not because of breached walls, but far, far within

In the aftermath of a gavel's echo
The moon shifts
Leaving us in a constant effervescent imbalance

There are soldiers pacing
Left, right, left, right
Halting our progress in the arc we're set upon

This red sky is draining our blood
Like fleas upon our flesh
Drab and scattered visions, unyielding to good intentions

Brave soul slithers away
A python with no fangs
He flees and fades into swollen glands of fallen visionaries

Leashed curses wrench loose
Boulders fall on empty heads
We are more near to barbarism than we first guessed

Fire, spreading, unfurling
Left, right, left, right
Untie these bonds, and we will watch them all burn

Faded stars and bittersweet Thursday mornings
Where one end of this rope is tied to the dawn
And the other end has frayed and broken free

I find scattered amidst this sunrise all that I have hunted
Taunting me, delicately erasing hovering shadows
And exposing the darkness for the liar it has become

A fleeting slumber is the crux of my discontent
Where one eye opens to a world of majestic wonder
And the other opens to the aftermath of my dreams

She is aimless.
He is distracted.
I am imperfect.
We all pour salt in our ***** wounds.

She is gravity.
He is weightless.
I am destitute.
Just a scream lost in the vacuum.

She is deliverance.
He is patient.
I am astray.
Forever a breath that stains the salty air.

She is aimless.  
He is distracted.
I am imperfect.
Still a coward lurking in bravery's lair.

I remember our heyday like it was yesterday
Starswept and bittersweet
I revolved around your sun
And jumped in with both feet

I remember our heyday like it was yesterday
You were extra and I was ordinary
I dismantled my world and myself
Everything but you was secondary

I remember our heyday like it was yesterday
Feast or famine, we ate our fill
The minute-hand lost its meaning
Time, a well-behaved child, sat perfectly still

I remember our heyday like it was yesterday
Three hour drives within a culdesac
Just to grasp at the straws of you
Just to drift away into a sea of black

I remember our heyday like it was yesterday
Golden years brought silver tears
But we weathered and eroded away
Became sandstone, and finally disappeared

I keep a faded picture
Thirty-two cents
And some lint in my pockets

The picture is who I was
The thirty-two cents is who I am
And the lint is what I will become