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I'm running on Bacardi
Drinking like a slob at this party
My heart reaches for her hand
But only on the bottle does it land
I pour another cup of drink
And into a mattress I sink
Thinking just of her
As the world around me blurs
My heart twists and turns
While my esophagus burns
My face goes numb
And now I am drunk
Don't drink that stuff.
 Oct 2015 cait
Lora Lee
I'm hanging out
our ***** laundry
tonight.
Sticks and stones
and broken bones.
Words actually do stain
as my whites mix with colors
and flow through the air,
pegged down to the last insult.
The best stain remover could be love.
But we've got a really
tough collection,
here tonight.
Despite the hot water wash, those
hard-to-get spots are
still there.
And my brain and heart are
being tumble-dried
the heat, the harsh words
washing out my pride.
My outs are in, my ins outside.
The world's a-tumble
As we wear the cloth down
to the last few threads.
As usual, we forgot
a good dose of softener
to make mellow
the words as they jump
from  our tongues
and enter our heads.
I would save my heart
if I could save yours, too
But it's just all spinning too fast,
What on earth
Shall we do?
We'll just have to hang it up as it is.
Let the world see
that there is no perfection
Let those dulled brights
be a kind of reflection.
Perhaps next wash will be better.
We'll know by then
what to use.
Perhaps love will take over,
rekindle the blown-out fuse.
Right now I'm just gonna
curl up in this
basket. Wait for the
stormy cycles to end.
One thing's for sure.
We must clean up our act
Lest the cottons unravel
We must sew up each tear
Before our hearts start to travel
We must take care of the frayed silks and satins
the polyester
before they are beyond any repair.
Tend to those stains,
Straighten each snare.
Take my love
In a many-hued heap
Smelling of sweet soap
Warming your cheek.
A leap of faith
A dash of desire
Let's wash out the pain
Rub away all ire.
Let's have a laundry party,
Tonight.
Naked on the clean bright sheets.
Let the kisses remove
the harshest of stains
Let caresses replace the words
of pain.
The only softener we'll use
Is the creaminess of tongues.
Let the world see
Our love, tonight.
Flowing on the line
for all to perceive.
Darling, we must give just to give
And then we'll
receive.
From 2013
 Oct 2015 cait
A Lopez
Unwanted
 Oct 2015 cait
A Lopez
I just nodded my head
Gave him the gracias he
Wanted, went off to bed
I felt dead
Unwanted.
 Oct 2015 cait
Phoebe Caitlin
you promised to pluck the stars from the sky
to place between our hearts
but oh my, you already held galaxies in your fingertips
when your hand touched mine
grasped it tight and we thought of home
among the shining, shimmering embers
i loved you more than all the stars in the sky
oh god
if you ever came back
i would open my heart
and the stars would stream out
and I could love you again
when my stories stop ending in tragedies, maybe then I could love you again
 Oct 2015 cait
Phoebe Caitlin
Is it a bird?
Is it a plane?
No! It's the kid with the gender neutral name!
They'll catch bad guys
With a flick of their eyes
But we still don't know
What's between their thighs
Save kittens from trees and babies from homes
But who knows their ***? their chromosomes?
They'll steal your girl
Then steal away
It's the Gender Pretender
who'll save the day
 Oct 2015 cait
Phoebe Caitlin
Gender
 Oct 2015 cait
Phoebe Caitlin
Girl things

An old friend ; a common alias
A time worn facade
A mask, protection
A lie, deflection

Boy things

Alien ; foreign
Yearning
Bad tasting, false 
Fear , persecution

Girl things? Boy things?
My things

Girls like boys they say
Boys like girls the same way

But girls like girls like I do
And boys like boys too

Girls are girls they say
Boys are boys in the same way

But I am neither
Not girl things
Not boys things either

Boy? Girl? Me

He? She?

They
 Jul 2014 cait
Phoebe Caitlin
A wise man called and asked his son
'What would be changed in the world
if I were gone?

Nothing would be changed.

The moon would set
And the sun would rise
The Earth would keep on turning
And clouds would still tumble over eggshell skies
So why should I stay?'

The son got up and replied in haste
'But father, it would be such a waste
For the stars are nothing
Without man to behold
To marvel how creation
Could ever be so bold

And although new days would dawn
And the sun would still rise
I would look upon the sight
With hardened eyes

You don't mean anything to the world
But you mean the world to me.'

So the wise man laughed
Then the wise man cried
And when the new day broke
He looked upon his son
With hope in his eyes
 Jul 2014 cait
Phoebe Caitlin
When I came out to you
You laughed at me
And I felt like ****
I like you - we went on holiday together
But you don't like me

"Gay guys are alright
But it would be weird to know a lesbian
What if she had a crush on me?"
I like you - you have a cute laugh
But you wouldn't like me

Two girls at the back if the bus
"You guys aren't lesbians are you?
Because if you are, we won't sit with you."
I like you - you're popular and funny
But you wouldn't like me

There's a strange boy at Scouts
"Oh yeah he's such a *******,
he must be gay."
I like you - we went to camp together
But you wouldn't like me

"I was at the cinema the other day
I saw two girls kissing
It was so gross."
I like you - you'd always beat me at cards
But you wouldn't like me

If I told you I was gay
How would you react?
I'd still like you
But you wouldn't like me
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