I’ve filled the emptiest spaces of myself with


                          the best parts of you

not breathing, warm like an homage
but sterile
    
                                                                          remote

a gallery of looped memories
beautiful and untouchable
and convincingly bright
so that no matter where I am
my retinas are tattooed with the space you took in the world
cooking in a scratchy sweater- your electric rants about Jung  
drumming jazz on the street corner for the pay of odd conversation
planting kisses in my hands because you hoped they would grow a wife
endlessly reminding me

                                              (from wherever you are now)

that the best things in life weren’t free
and though expensive beyond measure
how graceful- I hardly noticed how much
I was willing to give
just to keep at a quiet distance

                           this neuronal gallery

i will siphon you desolate
and leave a desert
inside your veins

and the oasis that was
once your heart
will become a tomb
sand-flailed
eroded
buried

the same you
did to me

14 March 2014*

There are nights when I find,
Myself alone under your grace
Your presence carved
In my surroundings
I’m lost again.
Why do I never learn?
When you always
Show me the way

Nothing is dark enough
At this night with you
I can’t be afraid
Up there, you’re just
Watching me over
Until the first light
Of dawn rises
Inside of me

This journey along
The dark and long night
Sail through the sea
Of charcoal clouds and
Fish for the stars
Anchor in the moon
And just like that–
Awed by the mixture
Of dreams and nightmares
The beauty of contrast
Of beautiful and grim
The two sides
Of the story

Short days and
The nights are long.
We found each other's
Company.
Loneliness, let’s not—
Put it in the heart.
You’re not alone,
Hold my hand as you
Guide me to safety.
You’re my direction
My north star
Polaris