She left me
I never thought she would
I don't know what I did
and she wouldn't wait to tell
I went out that night
I never do
well now it's never did
it became routine
arrive at 9
drunk by 10
home by 1
escorting my visitor out by 9
you know most times
I never learned their names
I never wanted to
too personal

personally I think I'm fine
I don't think about her as often
and if I do I drink
until the thoughts subside
the pain drains away
only to refill itself
every morning I'm woken up
by the same pain I'd avoided
the night before
but over time it lessened
my mind learned it's lesson
it forgot how to love
I stabbed myself the other day
and was surprised to see I bled
the pain didn't register
as I lay another woman that isn't her to bed

I guess you're getting tired of my drunk phone calls at 3am.
I guess you don't care about my slurred sentences begging
For you to come back.
And I guess you're happy laying there alone when you know I'm just breaking into peices without you to hold..

you're aching, and tragicly breaking.
living your life in dispair.
your praying, and you're waiting,
for someone who doesnt care,
he was never really there.

you're burning, and you're yearning,
for him to come through,
stop wasting all your time on him,
and just start loving you.

we lay in bed
and speak to the ceiling
through each other
to one another
and finally tell our feelings
to the placeholders in the walls
to the guilt inside our chests
you were meant for loving
and i am craving it
my arms around you
my mind intertwined in this sweet divide
of where you and i started
of where you and i hide
it's easy to lose
when you face the collide
but darling,
all i've ever wanted
was to be by your side

In your hours of loneliness,
when you lie barren
& temptation teases you,
it doesn't really matter,
either one will do my love,
I will be with you
in fiery spirit.

You held me close,
confided in me,
exposed yourself
& told me
you were diseased
& I dissed you.

Christ,
you're the one
I should have kept.
I miss you're honesty
& warm kisses,
you.

I've know every square inch
of your beautiful topography,
kissing you from your crown
to the tips of your toes.
I've memorized every curve,
nook and cranny,
slipped between your hills,
ventured up
into your valley
& journeyed over
your long stretches.
And during my travels
over you,
I learned wanderlust
& I must have you,
again & again.