Tell me when you look at me
do you see me for who I truly am?
Or do you   w i s h  
to see me for who you want me to be?

I am not all that you think I am.
What if one day
that comes    suddenly  
as    all    days    should.
You look at me and find
I am some one new.
Not
who you think I am.

I told you
shown    you    me.
Given you a piece of my soul.

You don't know me anymore?

That's because you never saw me.
Who I truly am.
For all I am to you has been your imagination.

I have always been,
never less
never more
never fake
never anyone
other then MYSELF

You fit into my thoughts like your poems fit in my pocket...

Delightfully comfortable.

I could write you a list so long, outlining all my flaws.

You call me beautiful and I can almost see it.

Hands could intertwine and it could be so wonderful..

But you'd have to get to know me.

Walls could come down...

But you'd get to close.

It could be wonderful for awhile.

Bodies tangled and laughter filling our hearts.

But I get scared so easily.

You are a masterpiece...

I'm resisting the impulse to run as emotions take me.

But I know an absence of you would always linger in-between if I did.

All I know at this moment..

Is I couldn't stand for "us" to be another broken memory along the floor.

But how could that be possible when I'm so consumed with thoughts of you.

I cry in secret,
silent sobs shake me.
Tears roll quietly
and    fall    wasted around me.
Leaving a taste of disdain from showing weakness.

I resent what you have made me become.
You can beat me
damage me with your words     and      hands.
Ill never expose the impact of you
c r u s h i n g    me.

I cry
In secret
quiet sobs shake me.
You will never have the satisfaction of seeing me cry.
Or the realization of how badly
you     have     broken
me into pieces.

I whisper your name to myself,
and it puts this smile on my lips that's hard to wash away.
This feeling that's come over me,
Is so very warm.
It spreads with delight from the top of my head,
to the very tips of my toes.

I'm tangled in words and emotions, thoughts spin out of control. Hypnotising me in endless day dreams. Possibilities as countless as heart beats.

You must be my new fascination.
I'm beginning to settle in,
becoming to comfortable in your thoughts.
I wonder how good your lips might taste touching mine,
How your body might feel under my touch.


Lay me down,
Let me belong to you.
Just don't let me fade away...
I crave to be more then an indent on your bed sheets.
This time,
I want more then a once whispered name.

The sweetest of words escape your lips and leave me breathless.
Butterflies flutter inside,
fill day dreams with your static covered voice,
So smooth and masculine.

Never have I been so drawn to the corners of another's mind,
wanting to fill myself into the creaks of your heartache.
I could heal you....
shower you in affection and adoration.

Your brilliance captivates me,
leaving me wanting more.
I'm to caught up in what ifs...
What lingers between that I can't confess,
is that I'm afraid,
I could get completely lost in you.

The floor is made of glass,
reflecting my slender silhouette.
My bare feet softly slide across the surface,
as gently as I tread I hear its threat to give,
Its cracking beneath me,
wanting to take me under to consume all that I am.
I hold my head high,
constantly reminding myself to breathe. This is a repeat,
I see it daily,
always watching where I place my next step.
Don't push,
or it'll shatter.
Freedom gave me the gift of wings,
yet I alone have stripped them from my body.
Intimacy is all but resolute,
warmth breaks the glass,
as I am undeserving.
I stand still tonight,
watching my reflection,
knowing its a betrayal to my inner person.
One day I'll give up,
bust the glass just to show,
how much I truly despise  myself.

I used to have these shoes,
Worn down and eventually to small.
But I adored them,
Danced in them till the joy faded and they could no longer hold me.

Black and new,
I once thought of the places they would take me.
Dreaming of childish possibilities. Never knowing that they could hold happiness.

I wore these shoes when you loved me most,
Growing and never fading from the feelings of those Mary Jane's,
The lace socks so pretentious.

I wore these shoes when the world was pure.
Way back when pretty things fit little girls,
And daughters where meant to love fathers.

I remember them more,
As you fade into the years.
A flash back of what I have thrown away.
Worn Mary Janes,
Still shinny but they fit so tight,
That day you left me behind.