at 4 in the
morning the sun
is never up
but i usually am

i worry
about things
that are out of
my control
even more about
things that are

get up early
when i work
and earlier
when i don’t
the older i get the
more i learn
sometimes you
need to cry it out

alone
at night
into your pillow
the blankets
wrapped all
around you

sometimes you
need to cry
and cry
and cry

until the morning
sun falls across
the tears dried
under your lashes

and the lump
in your throat has
dissolved so you can
breathe with ease

you need to get up
let hot water
wash it away
let the steam rising
from your mug soften
any sorrow left around
your morning eyes
take a deep breath
don’t mention it
to anyone

and
just
keep
going

i will
just
keep
going

oh the joys of idyllic
small town life in this
whitewashed village where
everyone knows everyone
and everyone knows
everyone’s business

where the groceries are
overpriced and the taxes
are high and everyone but
the wife knows he’s cheating

where everything is a scandal
and nobody will admit to knowing
anything but they’ll still talk
about it behind closed doors

there are supposedly prostitutes
on main street but i only ever see
the drunk and drugged out there
and if someone is single there is
someone determined
to find them a match

all and all a very pleasant
charming life we lead here
what with all the arrests
and the highway department
yammering away on things
and the way the tops of the semis
scrape the bottom of the
traffic lights on their way though

something charming about
the way the sides of the buildings
all need a good power washing
and there’s probably lots of
good clean arsenic in
the water supply

scenic
a most sleepy
little burg
they say

spend some time
with us and
you’ll find a community
you’ll find a home

you’ll also
find a thing or two
you’ll wish
you didn’t know

It's here and it's not
It's come and it's gone
The plague as she's called
Has left for the day
Clad in her red blood dress
Bejeweled with the bones of her captives
What'd you come to do I asked
Is your mission on earth finished
Or are you a forerunner of the demon to fear
A smirk as scary as uncertainty
Spreads across her lifeless face
And with eyes as sure as sky
reveals and answer I fear leads to suspense.

Tonight I taste your cancer,
my memory of your agony so real
and tangible

that I try hard to get rid of it -
mints, toothpaste, mouthwash, soap.

Tonight I hear your cancer too -
the brutality of your words was the vehicle
that tried to burn our bridges.

If I could do just one thing tonight,
I would reach out and hold your freezing hand,
one more time.

I used to make little whirlpools with my finger,
In the dark
When I was a bubble, you couldn't hear my pop
I landed back in the cold water
Bleach to sanitize, never enough
My eyes were bloodshot underwater
And I dove to the safest place
The bottom of the sea
The sea shells were never real
And neither was your face
The pressure in the trench would take my breath away
Float to me, I always screamed
But I was too busy chasing the light.

I met her
at
the local book-
shop
and for a
brief
moment in time
we
didn't feel alone
anymore.

the sun spilled upon her lashes,
her breaths long as she glanced above
by chance, catching wind of his russet hair
obscuring the view of his soft blue eyes.
unknown to him
she watched as he stepped his skateboard down,
noticed his worn black jeans
and colorful sneakers,
him rolling away
not knowing how he caught
the girl's starry eyes.