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a Sep 2018
I feel cold, lost , and in a daze
whenever you speak
I wish it was just a faze
But the **** I just smoked
fades away into oblivion
Once at a good cloud 99
then you let out this storm
and my wings start to break
crashing down to cloud -9
but thats just the start of it
you continue these winds to knock me down
I've shot through, landed
on the hard white cement,
struck, motionless, razed.
This is what happens whenever you speak.
Dear Dirk,
Still got hope for ya though.
a Jul 2018
uncomfortable
high
tweaky
high
boredom
high
speedy
high
anxious
high
hard of breath
high
failing at chilling
high
fritzy
high
****
****
****
a May 2018
It isn't just her.
It's always been me.
They've always been prettier.
Had more of a pleasant appeal.
Each single one has been called "the it girl"
while I sit here wondering when it will be me.
It'll never be me.
My mentality is so sad, which is exactly why it shall never be me.
Always a bridesmaid never a bride, thats what they say.
Always jealous and depressed never going to be the one getting all the press.
I wish I could but for some reason I just can't seem to change me.
  May 2018 a
Black Leaf
I'm tired.
Tired of everything.
I just want to sleep,
And never wake up again.

No, I'm not lazy,
I'm not running away from life.
I'm just tired of the world and myself,
And too tired to change anything.
a May 2018
Green
Thats the color they always say describes me
I forgot of the fact that being green can also be very mean
Green represents the envy inside of me
I try not to but then you talk and talk so much about how you know you're going to be famous, know how you're going to be rich, know how you can just get any guy you want. Know you're that thang.
I try to let it be and not let the envy fuel inside of me
but I'm green of you. I wish I was so confident I was going to be famous, wish I could get any guy I want, wish I could speak/think so highly of myself everyday. Confidence is grace and I can’t pick up with your pace. But you explain your confidence so much it weakens me and makes me question if I'm the color green because of my energy or of my envy.
Or maybe my energy is envy, and deep inside I'm the only one that knows.
I know this isn't good, I use this as my online journal. Apologies if it makes you cringe
a Mar 2018
My religion teacher doesn't care about the arts.
But what if I don't care about religion?
My parents forced me to go to a catholic school. But I am going to study arts in college. Why can't you accept that the arts is some peoples vocation in life. You explain in class how things we're good at or find an attracting too at a young age is our vocation. I fell in love with the arts at a young age.
Stop being a hypocrite Mr.Majewski and respect the arts.
I'm not religious.
a Mar 2018
A clear face that has this glow
Big brown eyes and bushy brows
Chubby cheeks but somehow still has cheekbones
A smile with dimples that she gave herself
Buck teeth that are super white and bright
4'9 with thighs of steel
Perky ******* that finally grew in
An *** that's bigger than her tiny body
Hairy legs showing others she doesn't care
Scars on her body representing the obstacles of her life
All with a personality that's bigger than her.
join and look in the mirror and find the things you love about yourself. I usually avoid mirrors but my mom put this random one down and it was facing me as I did my homework. First time in a while I looked in the mirror and had good things to say.
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