her tears fell to the floor
like rose petals,
covering the salty earth
with reddish hues.

she opened her mouth to scream,
but the words
refused to leave her burning lips.

she took another drag of her poison,
letting it fill the gaps of her soul,
drowning her lungs
in the harsh chemicals of the world.

she exhaled all the worries and fears
she’d carried with her that day,
hoping tomorrow would be better.

“i’m sorry
please don’t think it’s your fault. life will go on and you will heal from all these wounds. remember you deserve happiness and nothing but it. remind yourself as much as i did, you’re worth it. every second. every minute. everything. i’m sorry i can’t talk about it. i’m sorry i’m not helpful. i’m sorry i’m not as strong as you. i’m sorry. i wish i could fix this. i wish i wasn’t the problem. i wish i could tell you everything. i wish it didn’t have to be this way. i love you. stay safe and stay strong, i believe in you.”

don’t leave. stay.

i’m still here.

turn off your phone, nobody actually wants to hear from you.
you’re really going to eat all of that?
someone should really cover up all these mirrors.
there’s no hope for you.
lost cause.
worthless.
disgusting.
stay in bed.
die.
die.
die.
DIE.
surviving shouldn’t be this hard, mom.

i wish i could tell you, i know you’d understand.
i’m sorry.
i didn’t mean to trigger you.
i’m struggling.
i’m sorry.
i wish i could tell you, but i’m scared i’ll only make your progress worse.
i wish i could help myself.
am i okay?

It's sad.
I'm sad.
That the society I live in
will shove me in a box
That the people of this world
will look at me
and see not the words of my story
but the art on the cover
i'm sorry
If I'm not what you expected
For my voice leaks from the edges
And I color outside the lines
or
should there have been
no lines
to begin with

learn to forgive
not because they deserve chances

it's because you deserve peace
a peace of mind