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Amanda Elizabeth Mar 2016
i can't turn off my mind
when all this energy is circling around me, it's hard to see what is lost
and you say you've lost the air completely
so how are you breathing
with the world in constant motion?
how can you even feel what is real?
is it really brighter in the dark?
the sunrise heats this arbitrary place
mysteries roll down my face like the sun's rays
i'm caught in the backseat with an imperfect view
03/5/16 this started out about someone else but now the identity is puzzling me
Amanda Elizabeth Mar 2016
It’s a green moonlit path; the beauty is greeted with the ethereal flow of semiopaque water. It is not clear of the whereabouts, perhaps somewhere near-maybe somewhere near the sea. And for whatever reason, I picture you there, to breathe in the cool air, the dust from the stars that ricochet off the water, the lights beaming, transcending thoughts and vibrations I want to put in a jar, until I conclude that they are intangible. They only exist in your mind.
How can I breathe through you if I cannot even attain a piece of you?
Deep inside me, you’re there, but to hold, I cannot find you.
Who decides what is real and what is a dream?
I feel you in the flowers, I see you in branches on trees, oh if only life could be so small. The atmosphere has inexplicable elements, elements that make up our story, and I love every part of it.
I could conjure a treehouse, and we can abandon the world. We’ll redefine our own reality. Spirits will live within wood paneled walls, lined with olive branches and glistening with the sound of cicadas. Our veins will match the patterns of that a plant, the lifeblood of leaves, as we coexist with nature, and you’ll remember we are one in the same. We can burn our material things, the things we seem like we care about, but we know that if mankind had not corrupted society with these time consuming ideals... I’ll tear away the misadventures in your brain. We won’t be able to hide ourselves in nature, instead, we’ll live through it. But hurry up, we’ve only got eternity.
i wrote this with flowers bloom by high highs in mind
03/5/16
Amanda Elizabeth Jan 2016
absence of dreaming
and a disembodied mind
let's me choke on the pills
little hollow bones
and hands and toes are fine
i guess my body's clock is out of time
there's no light through this smoke
at least i have chemicals to bloat me,
to haze me with dopamine
but where is everything else?
where are the vivid colors
my life when it was filled with flowers?
i want to sing to another heart
but i'm just caught in layers
unsure how to articulate prayers
whatever i'm hiding, i've already lost
in the dark, fading into gray
no more daydreams
screaming under a veil
30 tiny pills without condition
the strike of a match,
the lip stain on a coffee cup,
the drop of blood in a river
the lighting of a wrinkled cigarette
an empty vial medicating
progressive thoughts
all the unspeakable things
something's wrong,
no one's happy
i envision myself somewhere but
i'm just dark and cold
1/26/16
Amanda Elizabeth Jan 2016
as this flame stares,
i stare back
a light losing,
eyes already lost
the sky is breaking darkness and
my finger burns but,
i'm spiralling,
i float.
it's not chaos,
a swifting fire is my guide
a humble shape shifter under the moonlight.
this language it speaks,
i understand
with a pocketful of dreams to burn, and
clouds breathing through my soul
telling me
i'll be on the salty seas at twilight
01/13/16 or 01/14/16 idk i was high
Amanda Elizabeth Jan 2016
i ricochet my thoughts
as you flood my subconscious mind
I am small and
my world crushes under the pressure
of your hands
but even then I appreciate
your warmth
1/2/15
Amanda Elizabeth Dec 2015
He holds a piece of glass to leak his white sky
He roams around lost in a pipedream, eyes blind
He perceives a false distortion of time
He is lost inside
He falls behind with dreams he can't find
He enables a ghost to host his mind
He haunts me to believe our thoughts are aligned
He clouds his wounds with a flower
He pretends he's not sinking in his sanity every hour
He said We'll all float on okay
He sang Don't you worry, we'll all float on

I remember us walking, feeling colors in our heads
I remember injecting your brain with vibrations unheard
I remember your eyes radiating before you told me you felt something
I remember them telling me my psyche was cracked
I remember the highway glare, halfway there
I remember my mother telling me, "One must still have chaos in oneself to be able to give birth to a dancing star."
I remember she added: "Love is blind, friendship closes its eyes."
I wish I didn't invest so much time
I wish i glimpsed his fathoms before I thought him to shine
I wish someone gave me a sign
11/8/15
Amanda Elizabeth Dec 2015
i want to write a card splattered with ink blots
covered with my smell and imbedded with pale blue tears
folded in half, sealed with devotion, sprinkled with powder
honest intentions, or thoughts to share under the moon
so i will fall into a waterless pond or
love from a graveyard will travel somewhere else
do you want to keep me?
come over in your silver car, stop at the corner store
let's create something sentimental
broken lights are gone
12/7/15 this makes sense in my head somehow
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